It took us over 3 years to find the right place for us. In that time we pulled out of a couple of properties and we were gazumped on others.
We became so desperate to move several times during these 3 years that we found ourselves offering on properties out of our required location and with other issues, and lots of compromises.
We also often wished (in hindsight) that we'd gone ahead on properties that we'd missed out on.
At one point last year we were in the process of buying a place 3 miles away from the location we needed, it was on steeply sloped ground (I have mobility issues) and had boundary issues as well as subsidence problems and drain/sewer problems (private, so at our cost).
We were looking in an area that is very popular and we'd become so disheartened/desperate that we were ignoring all these issues. The vendor wasn't at all helpful:
He hadn't disclosed any of these issues himself; we found out about them via our survey and by doing some digging, etc, and he wouldn't lower the price. As it was in a high risk area for subsidence and having already suffered with such issues within the last 15yrs we would've struggled to get house insurance (and from the one insurer we could find the price was extortionate).
Looking at the work the house needed (rewiring, etc), the fact that it was at the top of our budget and that there was a high possibility of a large development getting the go ahead a few streets away we must've been mad, but we were so fed up of searching we felt we had no choice.....(what if nothing better came up, etc).
Fortunately, we came to our senses after a lengthy chat (triggered by the vendor being difficult) and decided that we'd have to pull out and that we needed to stick to our original criteria. We were happy to compromise on some things (eg house instead of our preferred option of bungalow. ..as long as it had the potential for bedroom and toilet downstairs), but we couldn't compromise on location as DH needed to be able to walk to the station and the DC needed to be able to walk to school.
I'm happy to say that about 2 months after we'd pulled out of the last place and during quite a slump in suitable properties (when we wondered what the hell we'd done) we stumbled across a lovely, but small, bungalow with a lovely garden in the right area. It hadn't been touched since the 70s wrt decoration and the electrics need rewiring and the whole place needs extending/modernising, but it had a lovely feel to the place and the neighbours were really friendly. It had only come on the market that day and was actually well, well under budget (if you exclude the work that needs doing).
We offered the full asking price and although there were a few issues that slowed things down (not registered on the land registry to name one), we finally moved in in November 2015. It's cramped, but we have our vision which is currently going through pp, and the neighbours are lovely, and we couldn't be happier.
We were talking about our 3 1/2 year search recently and we're so glad that we waited and had the courage to pull out of the others. Out of all the houses we liked at over the years this one is in the top 2.
The other one had a bigger garden/plot and I loved the style of it, but we were gazumped by a cash buyer and there are only 5 houses like it on the street (and only 3 have the large gardens) and they rarely come up so it would've been pointless waiting for that to happen.
My point is to give you hope that you'll eventually find somewhere you both agree on, and to encourage you to stick with your gut instinct. Don't compromise on the major things you originally wanted (like location), I think you'd regret it; and don't go ahead just to be able to say "I told you so!"
Have you thought that you might struggle to get house insurance, or that it might be ridiculously expensive with regard to the Japanese Knotweed problem???
Anyway, I hope things work out for you 