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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Dais choosing almost same name as my dd..

85 replies

Littlecatbigpanther · 02/03/2016 14:52

Aibu to find this a bit odd, my dsis is due to have her baby any day and has told me they are planning to call it almost the same name as my dd, who is 1yo.

I don't want to say the names for fear of outing, but it's like my dd being called Maisie and her dd being Macey. It's hard to tell the names apart when spoken. I am quite bemused by the whole situation, until now they had several names on their shortlist, but apparently this final choice is for definite...odd?

OP posts:

MelanieCheeks · 02/03/2016 18:44

Just asked DH to comment on this. His son, and his sisters son, have the same name. His response was;

"Really? Whats' the issue? No-one has the copyright on a name.".

NinaSimoneful · 02/03/2016 19:23

I have a cousin with the same first name as me, different surnames and she is five or so years older. She would be called Big Nina and I was Little Nina.

I wonder if it ever bothered her, she was always tall and slim and as a child I was as wide as I was (not very) tall! Probably not, it'd be more likely to have annoyed her if it was the other way around and see was 'big'.

Spandexpants007 · 02/03/2016 19:27

It's fine

Bogeyface · 02/03/2016 19:36

Although it could be worse. John Paston lived in the 15th century and for some reason names both of his eldest sons John! So there was John Sr, John II and John III

Must have been chaos when the post came!

lalalalyra · 02/03/2016 19:42

FIL has this in his family. Him, his Dad, his nephew and a couple of cousins all had the same name, but that's because they were called after his Grandfather. It amuses me because his nephew is known as "Wee Xxx" despite the fact he's not 6'5 and towers over the lot of them.

If it's a family name it's fair enough imo, but if it's not then it's a bit odd.

Quietlifenotonyournelly · 02/03/2016 19:58

It wouldn't bother me, in our family (think cousins) we have three and two with the same name and two with very similar sounding names.

Quietlifenotonyournelly · 02/03/2016 19:59

Oh and ds1 has the same name as DH.

ILoveACornishPasty · 02/03/2016 20:05

Reminds me of a cheating wanker man I used to work with. He was having an affair and his other woman got pregnant at the same time as his wife. Wife found out and chucked him out. He begged her to have him back and so his other woman dumped him too. He ended up alone, no doubt with a huge maintenance bill and two little boys called Jacob. I'm not sure if that's hilarious or depressing. Sorry, no help op! Personally, I wouldn't be bothered but equally I can see why you would think it is a bit strange X

FeliciaJollygoodfellow · 02/03/2016 20:05

It wouldn't bother me at all. They don't live together, and even if they see each other every day it wouldn't matter.

I've seen this a lot on here and I don't get the angst! If my sibling chose almost the same name as my kids for theirs I'd rib them till the end of time about copying me

CalleighDoodle · 02/03/2016 20:08

Ive two cousins called elaine.

Lmao at convict chris and denise!

TopHat33 · 02/03/2016 20:12

YANBU to be a bit peeved/surprised. But - as you say - there's nothing you can do about it and your DSis is not BU really as it's only up to the parents to choose the name they want for their child. Take it as a compliment!

15 years after my mum and dad married, my dad's twin married a woman with the same name (and same occupation! Twins thinking alike!) my mum was a bit jokingly 'that's me!' But although obviously that's different as no choosing of names they were called in the family Bob's Liz and Harrly's Liz and everyone got used to it - no one registers and no problem

Tink06 · 02/03/2016 20:32

Going against the grain here but I don't think its right and would be really annoyed about it. My youngest dd and niece are like sisters and it would be just weird if they had the same name.

NotMeNotYouNotAnyone · 02/03/2016 20:33

I have two cousins with the same name, their fathers are brothers. We have a big family though

Alisvolatpropiis · 02/03/2016 20:37

I completely agree that it was historically normal. Hence the nicknames for names which people now longer realise this is the case for - Jack being a nickname for John, Harry for Henry, Daisy for Margaret (from Marguerite, which is French for daisy) etc.

But as we have far wider name pools and people are more adventurous in their choices now, I do think it is odd to select a very similar name. And would be annoyed in op's shoes. I wouldn't say anything to the parents, but I'd be annoyed nevertheless.

spankhurst · 02/03/2016 20:50

I think it's a bit odd. There are hundreds of beautiful names to choose from.

MatildaTheCat · 02/03/2016 20:58

I have the same name as my SIL. In the family we are known as Big Matilda and Little Matilda. My SIL does not like this much.

Perhaps point out to your sis that your DC could be known as Maisie And Macey Junior since they will inevitably be muddled up.

Rather different but I once knew of a man who left his wife and ds for OW and then had another son who he gave exactly the same name as his first ds. After that almost anything seemed OK.

Grapejuicerocks · 02/03/2016 20:59

I wouldn't like it.

CountryRoadTakeMeHome · 02/03/2016 21:15

Mia/maya? Myla/Mila?

Coconutty · 02/03/2016 21:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

molyholy · 02/03/2016 21:40

My dneice has the same name as me. I am big moly and she is little moly. I was very flattered that my ds couldn't think of a better name . Although I do wonder when I am 60 and she is 40 will it change to old moly and young moly.

liquidrevolution · 02/03/2016 21:53

Names run in twos in my family. There are 5 'doubles' amongst the cousins in my generation and a few in the cousins children.

It matters not. And my name sharing cousin is my best friend. We think its fun! She has a DS and I have a DD so no name sharing yet but it wouldnt bother me at all if she did.

WonkoTheSane42 · 02/03/2016 23:26

My grandmother went to school with two brothers with the same name. The elder brother was named after his mother's father and the younger after his father's father. The fact that both grandfathers had the same name seemed to be of little concern.

Bogeyface · 02/03/2016 23:28

THinking about this thread and I think it makes a difference what the feelings between the rellies are.

In my case, my cousin really didnt like me or my sister, because she saw my sister BF behind my sisters back, I found out and she was not popular when it came out. I know that she did the name thing to prove a point. So if there is bad feeling then its not ok as its usually point scoring.

But if it is just a case of people who get on and care for each other just really liking the same name, then thats different. Only the OP knows which it is.

Theresomethingaboutdairy · 02/03/2016 23:53

I don't think it really matters. My brother and I are the only siblings in a close family. We see each other with our children every other week. He had an Oliver, then I had an Olivia. I then went on to have a Henry and, two months later, he had a Harry. We manage!

Katarzyna79 · 03/03/2016 00:21

my husbands niece has same name as me. he named her before we met,because he liked the name so much, so i guess we were destined for each other ey? lool

i used to like my name but because she has the name i now find it common , its not common in the west but may be in some parts of south asia.

i would hate to be called big x and little x. thankfully my husbands bil refers to me by my sons name (because he's the oldest), followed by the word mother, i find this a respectful compromise , as i have no middle name.

we are in a pickle over names right now most of the ones we thought of before we had kids have been used, yet we still like them. ive been through all Arabic, farsi and Persian muslim names nothing jumps at me. i prefer names with good meanings and maybe pious figures. But if the name doesn't sound nice i still wouldn't use it just for the context. i have a boys name in mind that was easy but im struggling for girls names. everyone seems to have used it so many girls in my extended family.

my husband has said theres no copyright we can use whatever name we like, he;s right in theory......

good point bogey

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