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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Dais choosing almost same name as my dd..

85 replies

Littlecatbigpanther · 02/03/2016 14:52

Aibu to find this a bit odd, my dsis is due to have her baby any day and has told me they are planning to call it almost the same name as my dd, who is 1yo.

I don't want to say the names for fear of outing, but it's like my dd being called Maisie and her dd being Macey. It's hard to tell the names apart when spoken. I am quite bemused by the whole situation, until now they had several names on their shortlist, but apparently this final choice is for definite...odd?

OP posts:

ExitPursuedByABear · 02/03/2016 16:57

We used to stay with a family who had two dds. Hannah and Annie.

Never could understand that.

lastqueenofscotland · 02/03/2016 16:59

Meh out entire family seems to be called Alice. Wouldn't bother me

willconcern · 02/03/2016 17:02

Have you thought that maybe this has always been the name they've wanted to call their child, and they may feel you 'stole' it for your DD?

SatsukiKusakabe · 02/03/2016 17:03

That should say "dneice" not Denise! She didn't even make the list.

I think that's why it's worth having the conversation about it, you don't know their reasoning, they may not mind, clear the air.

Original poster

Littlecatbigpanther · 02/03/2016 17:03

I don't mind them using it but do find it quite bemusing, as they had a few on their shortlist and it's not a name either of them have liked for years or anything like that, they found it in a baby names book. Neither name is very common but they sound almost identical.

I suspect a few people in the family will be as bemused as me by their choice. Oh well never mind!

OP posts:

mathanxiety · 02/03/2016 17:04

Some people don't make a connection at all -- I know a baby named Jacob James. Then there are names that to one person sound similar but to another they are completely different. Or families where one person has a compelling reason to want a particular name - deep affection for a grandmother, etc. Then there is pregnancy tunnel brain, which renders you oblivious to all other babies or small children, even those you have known for a while.

SatsukiKusakabe · 02/03/2016 17:07

They may subconsciously like it because it sounds like your dd's name, and they are taken with it on her, but have convinced themselves it's different enough.

CamboricumMinor · 02/03/2016 17:12

It could be worse; my half sister and I have the same name. Yes, exactly the same - until I got married anyway.

mcoy · 02/03/2016 17:16

Depends how close you are and if you spend a lot of time together

2 siblings in our family both had James' a few years apart

Daily life makes no odds as they live in different cities and during the holidays when they're together - one is Jamie and the other James

Original poster

Littlecatbigpanther · 02/03/2016 17:19

There is no shortening/adjusting of the two names so they will always sound the same.

I suppose it's a bit flattering as I know they like my dd but then she is a lovely baby I wonder if they'd have chosen the name if my dd had been a nightmare baby?! like my ds

OP posts:

orchidnap · 02/03/2016 17:20

my sister did it to me. wont say the names in case of outing, but she gave her child a shortened version of my DSs name.
I was really annoyed at the tim,e but was told i was being unreasonable by almost everyone who knew!

Alisvolatpropiis · 02/03/2016 17:24

It's odd. Hopefully someone else will mention it to them.

Are we talking Ada/Ayda sort of thing?

Original poster

Littlecatbigpanther · 02/03/2016 17:27

Yes alis very similar, the spelling is slightly different but if you said both names no one would know which one you meant. I suppose family gatherings may become interesting!

OP posts:

Happyrouter · 02/03/2016 17:31

I have a cousin with the same name and it never occurred to me that there was anything wrong or odd about that. I guess we're not as cle in age as your child and your sisters but still...

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 02/03/2016 17:33

Laughing over 'pregnancy tunnel brain' !
There is time yet for her to change her mind, or for other family members to point out the possible confusion which may occur. If you're close, I think it might be worth having this conversation with her yourself.
Obviously not worth falling out over..

Greyponcho · 02/03/2016 17:37

Will DNiece be "Maisie hyphen middle name" perhaps?
But yes, it is odd, but there's bound to be many other poorly thought out alternatives she has managed to avoid though (surely??)

NotCitrus · 02/03/2016 17:39

My dd and friend's dd have nearly the same name (like Anna and Annie).

I didn't mention the name to people before birth in case friend got upset, but luckily she thinks it's great to have more people with similar names, and their older brothers think it's great to have them named like in Octonauts (Gup-A and Gup-E....)

Everyone will manage. Even went on holiday with DP and friend with same name, let's call them David, and other-David's stepkids immediately managed to refer to DavidCitrus and DavidOurname with no problem at all.

Xmasbaby11 · 02/03/2016 17:40

Odd! It would bother me. I think I'd mention it in a lighthearted way. Ultimately it's not your decision but better to mention it now than afterwards!

MelanieCheeks · 02/03/2016 17:43

It's not odd at all! Firstly, it's not the same name. Secondly, even if it was, LOTS of cousins have the same name. Heck, even many fathers and sons have the same name.

OvariesBeforeBrovaries · 02/03/2016 17:52

Sort of like Eva and Ava? I can see how that would be really difficult. YANBU I think she's making things difficult. She'll have to cope with your DD being (for example) Ava, and hers being "Little Eva".

Bogeyface · 02/03/2016 17:53

My cousin was going to call her DS a shortened version of my sons name, but we used the shortened version for DS almost from birth. So she would say that they were calling the baby Sid (say) and people would say "Oh the same as Bogeys DS?" "NO!! His name is Sidney!". She got more and more pissed off, mainly with me which I didnt get at all since my Sid is 8 years older than her DS, until in the end she changed it to something completely different.......oddly enough the name for a boy that I had chosen when I was expecting DD

It was when she did that that the penny dropped that this was not really about names at all!

emilybrontescorset · 02/03/2016 17:54

I think it's odd.

Biscetti · 02/03/2016 18:07

Meh. One of my brothers named his son the same as my youngest son. Another brother named his daughter after (specifically after) my oldest DD. Delighted that they clearly have the same excellent taste as we do.

Vixxfacee · 02/03/2016 18:10

It's not bad if it is for example holly and halle

VikingLady · 02/03/2016 18:20

We've got 5 Chris's in our close family. Not really a problem, tbh. They get nicknames or descriptive prefixes: uncle chris, baby chris, so-and-so's chris, convict chris...

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