To think the 'Disrespect NoBody' ad campaign is horribly sexist?

[p4rmaviolet]

Not sure if this has already been discussed but has anybody else seen the 'Disrespect NoBody' TV adverts that are supposedly raising awareness for healthy relationships and domestic violence?

Every single scenario in the advert is targeted at men abusing women whether it be physically or emotionally. Y'know because men are never victims?

No it's not sexist.

HTH

So all focus should be on abused females?

The vast majority should be, yes.

Just a thought, but if you're so concerned about male victims then instead of whining about how sexist and unfair these campaigns are and expecting everyone else to do something about, why don't you actually do something about it yourself?

As far as I'm concerned, it is not my job as a woman to fix men's problems, it's their job.

I have previously read that 40% are men, and considering men are less likely to report domestic abuse, would it not make sense to raise awareness on the subject?

80% of reported abusers are men, but 40% of those reporting are men, a large chunk are same sex relationships.

It's certainly a problem that abused men are under represented. BUT That doesn't mean adverts targeted at helping women should be reduced.

To be fair in the advert there are five scenarios, of which only three are specific to females and no one suggests whether the relationship is straight or gay!

"If you are checking your girlfriend's phone, telling her who she can and can't speak to, that's not OK." (specific to a females, spoken by eyes with male voice)

"If your boyfriend's telling you how to dress, that's not right (specific to anyone dating a male, spoken by feet with female voices)

"If someone asks you for a nude pic, or keeps on at you to share one, you shouldn't have to deal with that." (not specific to anyone, spoken by breasts in a bra with a female voice)

"When it comes to sex, only an idiot would put pressure on someone." (not specific to anyone, spoken by boxer shorts with male voice)

"If you turn to voilence when your girlfriend disagrees with you, well that's not the way to deal with it (specific to females, spoken by hands with male voices).

Sorry, only two are specific to females and one to anyone dating a male, plus two which are not specific to anyone. I expect in most cases someone dating a male will be female but as I just said it's not specific to whether the relationship is straight or gay!

And the advert is freaky and I think they could have done much better!

This one is much better, shocking and sad ....

and this

Except it would be better with teenagers doing the talking (and UK accents for a UK audience).

PS - I expect in most cases someone dating a male will be female - I mean statistically.

I have previously read that 40% are men, and considering men are less likely to report domestic abuse, would it not make sense to raise awareness on the subject?

It's much less than that, and the way it takes place is often different.

Do you think we should stop screening women over 50 for breast cancer? Some men get breast cancer but no screening.

What about skin cancer? We tell pale people to be careful in the sun but not black people, black skin can and does burn and black people can get skin cancer.

Sickle cell disease? Why is all the information aimed at black people?

So because the vast majority of abuse victims are women the male victims should be ignored?

No, but you should really look in to the facts and see how patterns are different in male/female offenders (including in same sex couples) and how the violence towards women is usually (no not always) much worse ie broken bones and for 2 women a week death. That's over 100 women a year killed by a partner or ex partner, the number of men is less than 20 per year.

No that doesn't make it right, violence is still violence whether it is a slap or a stabbing, but one is less likely to kill you.

The reason there are no refuges for men is because of the different pattern of violence/other abuse, not because men are never victims but because the perpetrator acts differently.

Both men and women can be victims of financial abuse, but usually the man is working and has to hand money over whilst for female victims they are likely to not be working (obviously there are exceptions - like at Mick Philpott) so the support that is given needs to be aimed at the individual.

As for being a feminist fucktard - well if that is about saving lives (I believe women's lives are just as valuable as men's) hell yes I am.

Given how acutely you feel the injustice of men's lot in this world, Chrismet - I can 100% guarantee that had you been born a woman, you would've been the most rabid, frothing feminist to walk the earth.

Here ---> You seem a bit overwrought.

The only bit I felt a bit bothered by was the mention of boyfriends checking phones.

In RL it's overwhelming women I know that do this. One friend even tracked her DPs phone and would question him when he got home about where he was to try and trip him up/ It eventually split them up. He never lies once about where he was or cheated.

On here if an op says her dh is always checking her phone, she is told its controlling. But women are encouraged and even told how to do it. It does make me uncomfortable.

But women are overwhelmingly the victims in DV cases so of course it's going to be aimed that way.

Modern women are uncaring pieces of shit who don't give a fuck about men.

chris Statistically, there would have been more men than women involved in the commissioning, production and broadcast of this ad.
Are they "utter cunts" too?

Wasn't there a similar campaign about DV towards men fairly recently. I'm sure I remember someone whinging about it on MN saying it was stupid because the vast majority of DV victims were female.

The fact that it happens to women more often doesn't make it OK to abuse men. I think there is probably alot more DV by women to men than is ever reported because no one takes it seriously. I remember when there was the same attitude to DV by men to women. DV is never OK.

I agree with this.

It has disproportionate depiction of female victims and / or male perpetrators (in line with real life). But the tag line isn't "blokes! Stop abusing women!" It's a neutral campaign.

Mind you issues around male abuse victims might better be addressed in a format specifically aimed at gay men, since they're disproportionately the victims (and perpetrators) and the way to open the subject of female-male abuse might need a different approach altogether because of prevailing stereotypes.

Is it just me who's curious as to why someone rocks up on mumsnet for the first time today, and chooses as their username a name almost identical to a frequent poster in the feminism section, only does so in order to post anti-women, MRA shite?

Isn't it? Actually linking to MRA research too.

If someone Asian complained about racism you wouldn't turn around and say and be patronising with "what about the blacks" as if their suffering didn't matter.

Irony overload
for the hard of thinking, campaign featuring violence about women is mentioned, poster saying 'but what about men!?' as if the women's suffering doesn't matter

Modern women are uncaring pieces of shit who don't give a fuck about men.

Leaving aside the fact that this campaign will have been made predominantly by men.....
Did women used to be better?
Back when we weren't allowed opinions, or jobs, or the vote, or our lives revolved around caring for our husbands and indulging their every whim?

Modern wimmin! With their freedoms and liberties! The fuckers.

If women don't give a shit about men being abused

No, women tend to care about anyone being abused.
But I for one care more about the hundreds of women killed by their male partners, and the hundreds of thousands abused on a daily basis by them, proportionally more than the tiny minority of men to suffer the same.

Here's what people like you tend to fail to grasp. If women have problems for which they need to access support, it's a long slog. We need to campaign for it, campaign for awareness, acknowledgement, funding, support. Then we need to ensure that other women who need it can find this help. Then we need to ensure that places can remain open, secure further funding.
Then we need to try to change public views and attack the root of the problem.

If men have problems for which they need support, they tend to shout 'WHY HAVENT YOU SORTED THIS OUT FOR US YOU UTTER MEN HATING CUNTS, YOU JUST CARE ABOUT YOURSELVES YOU SELFISH BITCHES' to the nearest woman.

Think about it.

And I'll just leave this here whilst you're mulling it over -

So because the vast majority of abuse victims are women the male victims should be ignored? Then you get people with the "what about the menz?" comments. Well done on being a bunch of cunts. Modern women are uncaring pieces of shit who don't give a fuck about men. Fuck the lot of you.

Thanks for proving that modern women are spoils entitled feminist infested fucktards. Women are constantly acting the victim yet when a man says something it's the worst thing in the world. Throw yourselves under a bus you utter cunts.

"Well done on being a bunch of cunts. Modern women are uncaring pieces of shit who don't give a fuck about men. Fuck the lot of you."
"Throw yourselves under a bus you utter cunts."
"you hateful harridan cunts."
"Fuck you."

combined with

"yet when a man says something it's the worst thing in the world."

Fantastic spokesperson for your gender there, Chrismet

DV victims are women. Overwhelmingly so. I work in DV and a lot of the male "victims" you see are men who have reported their partners to the police out of spite as the woman has snapped and lost it after years of having the shit kicked out of them. The stats also show a majority of male victims have also been perpetrators.

I'm not saying genuine male victims don't exist but they are extremely few and far between whatever the MRA might want to say.

Pretty representative though Dani - were this not all preserved in text you can bet we'd be hearing 'but what did I saaaaaay?'

Are they "utter cunts" too?"

Yes they are, unlike you I don't base my opinions on things based solely on their gender, while people like you only give a fuck when women have it bad.

Ah, I see. You're not sexist. Everyone's an "utter cunt" unless they agree with you. I bet you're a delight at parties - in fact, did we meet over the weekend?!?