to ask if its a really bad idea to TTC when we are in debt?

[neonrainbow]

DH and I have agreed to start TTC later this year. We are have our own house (with a mortgage) and are both in full time (hopefully secure) reasonably paid jobs. We also have about £15-£18k debt. (Some is from the wedding and a consolidation loan but the bulk is from where DH struggled when on his own with paying mortgage and bills and therefore racked up credit card debt and debt to family to avoid losing his house) We have already moved as much as we can to interest free and low interest arrangements.

We are keeping up with minimum payments on the debts with no problem, and paying off as much as we can but still its going down extremely slowly. Would it be a really bad idea to TTC this year with this hanging over us? If we did have a baby I think I would want at least 9 months off on maternity leave if not a year and then go part time, and I think we would struggle.

DH thinks we would find a way to manage. Im 31 and had always had this sort of age in my head as a good age to start having children and DH would have one yesterday if he could. I would be happy to get most baby stuff second hand so its the drop in wages and potential childcare costs Id be most worried about. I think it would take 2-3 years at least to completely clear the debt and not sure whether we should wait that long.

Is DH right? Do people just find a way to cope? Or would we be really foolish to take the risk?

Lots of projection on this thread.

My honest opinion? You'd be absolutely crackers to try to get pregnant with such massive debts around your necks. 15 to 18 grand is a bloody fortune! And it will remain an absolute fortune as long as you're just making the minimum repayments.

You'll need to be debt-free AND have savings for when you go on maternity leave. Most especially if you're fantasising about going part-time.

Live on one salary and use the other to get yourselves solvent. For as long as it takes.

Yes I agree re projection. The problem with ttc is that you don't know what will happen. At 30 I came off the pill to ttc and I got pregnant before I even got to my first cycle. The op needs to be able to cope financially if she gets pregnant quickly and a lot of people do. 1 in 6 couples have difficulty conceiving meaning 5 in 6 don't.

It doesn't have to be either or - either start TTC now or start TTC when the debts are cleared. I wouldn't wait to TTC until you're debt free - the perfect time to TTC will never come.

I would first aim to have a sizeable chunk of the debt gone though. Things like working overtime or getting another evening job are nigh on impossible when you have a baby to consider - in your position, i'd be spending 6 months doing that now, while you're free and you both can, and pay off as much as you can manage.

The 'your fertility massively declines after age 35' school of thought is now considered to be outdated, so you shouldn't hang up on this as a deadline.

Many women become pregnant easily in their late 30s or early 40s.

But obviously TTC now depends on your income and plans/entitlement to maternity leave, disposable income, why the debt arose and childcare arrangements if you choose to return to work. If you could still service the debt, fair enough. If it would leave you in a situation where you risked losing your home or facing serious debt management arrangements, perhaps not. May be better to focus on clearing the debt over the next couple of years and then reconsidering then.

This time next year you could be on mat leave with a tiny baby and your husband gets made redundant with no replacement job on the near horizon. You'd be totally fucked.

Don't think it could happen? Think again!

This time next year you could be on mat leave with a tiny baby and your husband gets made redundant with no replacement job on the near horizon. You'd be totally fucked

As would a lot of people. And you could get hit by a bus tomorrow, and the sky could fall in and...

The people with 15-18k of debt would be a bit more fucked than the people without, though. I wouldn't wait until they're debt free either, that's taking it older than I'd personally be willing to risk and I think you and I both advocate the middle ground here. But OP does need to be clear on how vulnerable a position they'd potentially be in if they don't make a real effort to clear more debt. There also needs to be thought about how ML would be funded. I don't agree with a poster upthread who said you need savings for it, that's not always necessary, but in a scenario with two full time incomes, debt and what sounds like at least some minimum repayments only, there might need to be some money specifically put aside to cover costs.

OP have you sat down and worked out what you'd get on ML, what DH would if he took some, what you'd get if working part time and what childcare would cost? There are online calculators you can use to calculate after tax income, though if you're on a modest income and you go PT you may not pay much either. You could also use the tax free childcare scheme.

Thanks for more opinions. I spoke to dh last night and set out my thoughts and this week we are going to have a look at our budget in greater detail. He has said if im at all uncomfortable about ttc we will just put it back and take things as they come . he would never put pressure on me so it was really good to have the talk with him so i know for sure we are on the same page. I feel quite positive now that we will be able to clear this if we put our minds to it.

Thanks for updating, sound positive. Good luck with budgeting and attacking your debts!

Good luck!

Thank you for all your input and help