This probably seems completely random, and it's a long time ago, but it still bothers me to this day.
I moved in to a flat with a male friend I met online, we had been chatting and skyping for several months before deciding to be flatmates in a new country (England). He told me he couldn't see how we would not be a couple eventually, but I was head over heels in love with someone else, so I didn't agree.
Long story short, we moved in to this flat, I couldn't afford a bed, there was one included (no other furniture) in the flat, which was in his room.
I used to have this awkward thing that if someone (male) paid me attention, I had to have sex with them as a "thank you" if they took initiative. Ridiculous I know, I'm over it now.
So I had sex with him, once. And then evening came, and we decided to share the bed. In the morning, he then told me he'd uhm... been touching my private parts when I was asleep (sleeping pills so slept very heavily). I completely freaked out, ran off to a friend's house, and slept on the floor the next night. In the end he decided to move out because I wouldn't look at him or speak to him after this, as I felt so violated.
Though I still feel so guilty, because I did have sex with him the day before - but I didn't consent to him touching me up like that when I was asleep. Am I being completely unreasonable or is it acceptable that I feel bad about this? It was in 2009, so this has been bothering me for a while...