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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be fed up with 'Leavers' nonsense in primary school?

35 replies

EmojiOverload · 23/02/2016 18:35

I am really disappointed with my DD's school this year. She is in P7, the equivalent of Y6 (without the SATs!).

There has been Leavers' this and that since August- hoodies, yearbooks, prom (Hmm) already on the go. It is turning what should be a fairly straightforward transition (90% of them are going to the same high school!) into a massive 'thing'.

The P7s are given certain privileges and these seem to be getting more and more numerous. For example, they are allowed to sit in their own classroom at break instead of going to the playground. There is no supervision. I am worried about behaviour (boyfriend/girlfriend stuff seems to have tripled recently) and about phones being used.

They keep being referred to by the HT as 'our young people'. They are children FFS (this is picky admittedly).

For the past 6 years I would have said this was a very strict school. This year they seem to have let all standards drop!

OP posts:
Katenka · 23/02/2016 18:37

I can't see the issue with 'young people', they are young people.

But I couldn't cope with all the rest.

We had a leavers performance. And a leavers assembly. That was it.

Dd couldn't wait to leave and wouldn't have gone to a year 6 prom anyway.

LindyHemming · 23/02/2016 18:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Sparklingbrook · 23/02/2016 18:40

I know what you mean. it's 3 tier in these parts so we had a Year 4 Leavers' do/show/church service etc, then another round in Year 7.
Luckily then nothing til Year 11 prom.

TattyDevine · 23/02/2016 18:40

We have a leavers disco, a leavers "trip" day, and a leavers assembly. It's not "too much" at this point, but if they were to introduce a prom and a load of other bumf to buy that might be pushing it! It's nice to mark it out as a special year but they shouldn't go crazy with it...

FranHastings · 23/02/2016 18:43

We have a 'prom' (just call it a bloody disco), a hoody, a special day trip, photos, a ride in a fecking limousine and an evening meal out. The world has gone bloody mad.

Original poster
EmojiOverload · 23/02/2016 18:46

YY, prom, meal out, outward bound trip, assembly, yearbook, hoodies. Madness.

I am very suspicious of the classroom at lunchtime. I don't think they are daft enough to do anything big. I do think there is an awful lot of emotional pinching and pushing going on though (if that makes sense). I wouldn't call it bullying, but there's definitely been a big rise in she said and then she said back stuff.

OP posts:
RubyRoseViolet · 23/02/2016 18:46

I know what you mean. That all sounds totally over the top. Expensive as well! In terms of the break time thing though I do understand where the school are coming from. This time next year they'll be in a high school and will have to get used to eating their lunch unsupervised and being much more grown up. I think this is quite a good idea really. I'm surprised at the phones being allowed in primary school though!

ProcrastinatorGeneral · 23/02/2016 18:48

Y6 residential is fairly standard.

Leaver assemblies standard.

Leaver play is yet again standard.

Referring to them as young people is no bad thing. They will be responsible for being role models to younger pupils in their current school, and responsible for a lot more of their own care in their next one.

It really does sound as though you're just fucked off that your child is growing up.

wigglesrock · 23/02/2016 18:51

My eldest is in P7 (NI)- they have a BBQ, end of year hoodies given out, extra school trips, a lot more leeway in school - they get various fundraising responsibilities. It is a big deal to them - they have worked really hard, P6 and up to November in P7 is a nightmare of a year for them (transfer tests). The vast majority of them won't go to the same post primary schools - my dd will be the only girl in her class going onto the "big" school she hopefully will end up in. P7 is "sold" as a reward for their hard work - it was the same when I was in P7, over 30 years ago (minus the hoodies).

QueenLaBeefah · 23/02/2016 18:52

Our school does a leaver show at the end of primary 7!! It is every bit as bad as it sounds.

Don't get me started on the limos after the prom. Urgh. And the past few years the boys have been hiring kilts and the girls look like they are in my big fat gypsy wedding.

99% of them are all going to the same high school. ConfusedHmm

NotnowNigel · 23/02/2016 18:52

Totally ridiculous!

Mine had the girls in really tarty 'party' skimpy dresses, riding in a limousine, screaming and drinking pink 'champagne'.

The boys the minority who would be persuaded to go were utterly bemused and looked at the girls as though they were aliens.

Was a horrible, irritating, expensive evening.

Original poster
EmojiOverload · 23/02/2016 18:55

Fair enough if it is standard- but it's February. They're at school until June and they're mostly all going to to the same secondary!

OP posts:
BackforGood · 23/02/2016 18:57

I'm with you OP - sounds completely ridiculous - all part of some people's rush to make children into grown ups Sad
I'm glad none of this happened hen my dc were leaving Primary.

titchy · 23/02/2016 18:57

It's not just about saying farewell to friends who may be going to other schools - it's about marking a pretty massive (in their lives so far anyway) transition to secondary school. Don't you remember the fuss you made of them when they started school - all the exciting things they'd learn, new friends, uniform etc etc. It's as big a deal....

Original poster
EmojiOverload · 23/02/2016 18:59

I think they are making too much of the transition. I know it's a big change, but there's a way to deal with that sensibly and without hyping them all up.

OP posts:
Creatureofthenight · 23/02/2016 19:03

Good grief, the older kids proms are bad enough with the money that gets spent on them - why do 11 year olds need a prom - just have a disco?
And leavers stuff should be kept for the last term.
I would agree that they are children, not young people, but is quite normal for Y6 classes to have more responsibility and therefore a few extra privileges, no bad thing in most cases. But would probably be a good idea for a teacher or midday supervisor to at least pop their head in over the lunch break if they're all in the classroom unsupervised.

Twinsareplenty · 23/02/2016 19:05

It's only february?
We organised tee shirts, yearbook (completely blank so they could write in each others books) and a 'prom'/disco. Whole lot was sorted in the last two months of the school year, if that.
Since august? Mental!

MrsJorahMormont · 23/02/2016 19:13

I have family in Northern Ireland and they still talk fondly about being allowed to go to the chip shop for lunch after their 11 plus. It was the highlight of the entire primary school experience :o

oldlaundbooth · 23/02/2016 19:31

'YY, prom, meal out, outward bound trip, assembly, yearbook, hoodies. Madness'

This is all at primary school? Shock

Original poster
EmojiOverload · 23/02/2016 19:38

Yes! I didn't get as much when I graduated from uni!

OP posts:
Flashbangandgone · 23/02/2016 19:41

titchy. Perhaps, but it's February ffs!

Flashbangandgone · 23/02/2016 19:44

And however big starting school was, none of had 'about to start school' events crammed into the calendar from February onwards.... What is it with the crazy pressure to do more and more as though it validates an experience! I had an emotional leavers assembly, that was that, and that was enough imo

NinjaLeprechaun · 23/02/2016 19:47

"I would agree that they are children, not young people,"
Confused Children are young people. That's the point of children.

The idea of a 'prom' for 11 and 12 year olds does sound a bit silly. How do they pitch it, especially to the boys? "You have to dress up, and dance with girls... and it will be fun." - Not most 11 year old boys I've known.

anotherdayanothersquabble · 23/02/2016 19:53

I agree that it has gotten ridiculous.

My son spent Y6 having 'meaningful' experiences (weekly ice skating trips taht took all morning???) I wanted him to be bloody working!!!

There were many school traditions to follow, some dating as far back as the year before, in addition to a special one off Y6 musical production (in which the children mimed the songs!! This will make me identifiable if anyone else from our school reads this!!) The production rehearsals seemed to take up a huge amount of time, during which most of the cast were standing around.

Most of the class were leaving to go to school down the road.

Obs2016 · 23/02/2016 20:00

Ours was the same OP, with what seemed like endless events that just went on and on.