...to not want to sit on a huge turd??

[ILoveACornishPasty]

We are looking for a new sofa for our new house. I'm happy to go with leather but my husband has chosen this. He loves it. I think it looks like a huge turd! Please tell me it's not just me.

Shift

The ones we have here are similar to the Nic Cage one, but with Justine's face on, obvs.

PMSL at the toilet roll wallpaper.

There's definitely a foot "stool", but it scarily looks almost acceptable when compared to the armchair .

Also, are they definitely actual leather? Looks a bit pleathery in the photos (or maybe that's the finish that appears when one polishes a turd? )

The armchair looks even turdier!

I hadn't found the stool accessory and I am so tempted-it's The Husband's birthday in two weeks!! What better gift could there be?!

Apart from a Nicolas Cage sofa of course (am considering a Nicolas Cage/Vulva front room combo with bog roll curtains and perhaps I'll throw in a couple of tampon light pulls. Classy like.

<a class="break-all" href="https://www.google.ie/imgres?imgurl=cache4.asset-cache.net/gc/74772703-mancunian-stand-up-comedian-bernard-manning-gettyimages.jpg%253Fv%253D1%2526c%253DIWSAsset%2526k%253D2%2526d%253DX7WJLa88Cweo9HktRLaNXlHqTAD%25252FFgQUEt%25252F1MUn8j8SISb2oUbi1jlEdR1NNRPYxMapk1DKZnghJXbBATqXRWA%25253D%25253D&imgrefurl=www.gettyimages.ie/detail/news-photo/mancunian-stand-up-comedian-bernard-manning-gestures-news-photo/74772703&h=469&w=594&tbnid=37JdMMxmwYaOYM:&docid=ktP5NWjkSXRLdM&ei=Y5vLVvb7N4XQO7v8i_AJ&tbm=isch&ved=0ahUKEwi2ucXexIzLAhUF6A4KHTv-Ap4QMwgfKAQwBA" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Step too far?

It looks like a chocolate brownie

You're right, this is almost the ugliest sofa but I've seen worse in those TV ads. What are you going to say to DH? Will you allow it in your house? Does it at least come in a better colour?

Ok, in a previous job(bie) I was employed as a consultant ergonomist so will give opinion based on whether this sofa provides good lumbar support and the answer is no, it doesn't. He'll end up either slouched or lying along it instead). In my professional opinion, I'd seriously give it the bums rush and look for a compromise...something that's comfortable and looks less shitlike.

Ps my 6 yr old thought it was a sausage and got all indignant when I said most people thought it looked like a poo. It's clearly a sausage according to her so be told people lol!!

Only available in brown!!!!!

Is he winding you up, OP?

Well, that makes me feel better about the fugliness of the sofa I have that is older than god.

Awful Colour! Point out that the back rest is particularly low and not to mention looks incredibly uncomfortable. The arms just look wrong. If you go for a big piece of furniture it needs to look beautiful/elegant.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha! There is a link to this in the editor's picks email.

Utterly horrible and I couldn't live with it - it would annoy me to look at it day after day! Black might look slightly better, but yuk! It won't be very comfortable to relax on either so I would emphasize that to your hubby. You need something a better shape so you can kick back and relax properly. Can you quickly find an alternative and tell your hubby that you are in love with the one you chose and beg him for your choice instead?
I like leather sofas btw - I have one myself and I find the leather soft, warm and cosy.

at the Justine sofa!

That's horrendous op

This is gorgeous, cheaper, and doesn't look like a turd or a gaggle of ladyminges.

Well he was strangely enthused at the thought of a sofa punctuated with vulvas!! Bloody hell I've been with him since I was 16, I can't divorce him now (have considered it on the grounds of 'insisting on Gulliver's turd being the faecal focal point of our sitting room).

I've tried to find redeeming features. I've tried to think up methods of disguise but it's fucking awful. I'm afraid the only way this will enter our house is if David Beckham personally delivers it. Naked. And asks to see my vulva (sofa).

Ps heynonny I've never considered the collective term for minges. A gaggle, you say??

HelenMumsnet we need to see pictures of that! You could commission one on expenses as a surprise for Justine, she'd love it.

I wonder, as a percentage, how many owners of the vulva sofa have had sex with it, and how successful they were. I think if I saw one in someone's house, I'd rather stay standing than sit on it.

I'd say gaggle was about right, although I think 'a colony of beavers' would also do nicely.

Better than my husband's suggestion which was a 'squelch'....but we all know hat his suggestions are like...

Why do we need a collection WHY?

(Colony of Beavers?)

A mingle of Minges?