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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To find this poster in a train station wrong?

781 replies

megadude · 15/02/2016 16:43

Hi Mumsnetters,

I'd be interested to read your opinions about this poster. I don't want to say right now what I think about it, as I'd like to know how you'd interpret it.

TIA,
Megadude

To find this poster in a train station wrong?
OP posts:
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8
BertrandRussell · 16/02/2016 12:20

I am still fascinated by the many women who seem to think some sort of vested interest in thinking this sort of thing's OK. Who say victim blaming doesn't exist, and that "everyday sexism" is just people being professionally offended. Why??????

Also, why has there never been a poster aimed at men saying something like "Look after your mates- if you think one of them is going to sexually assault someone- stop him"

BertrandRussell · 16/02/2016 12:21

have some sort of vested interest......

LumpySpacedPrincess · 16/02/2016 12:23

Saramel, the don't rape poster is aimed at changing the attitude of society. Then maybe more than 15% would report a sexual assault, then maybe juries would convict more rapists instead of the woeful and shameful rape conviction rapes we have in this country.

Racism is not acceptable but it was so casual 30 years ago as society just accepted it, as we now just accept sexism.

TooOldForGlitter · 16/02/2016 12:26

I don't get it either Bertrand. I've never understood women like that, I never will.

Baconyum · 16/02/2016 12:27

“The children's campaign about talking to strangers, it reminds me of that.”

That campaign is now widely acknowledged to have done more harm than good because it reinforced the idea that most molestation was by strangers which we now know is so far from the truth. Children are no more likely now to be the victim of abduction molestation crime than in the 1950’s.

“The majority of men are not rapists and don't need telling how not to be one!” most rapists are unaware they are rapists because of our society's shockingly poor understanding of consent. The TV show I spoke of earlier and several pps posts of other campaigns eg the Canadian one ‘don't be THAT guy’ are aware of that.

I think the point re drink driving is about making certain behaviours not socially acceptable which has been shown to have a greater effect than legal change. I'm 43 and well remember it being normal to drink and drive even with children in the car. The various campaigns have made a massive difference to this and iirc the campaign aimed at the effects on drink drivers themselves (losing licence, losing job, spouse angry, social embarrassment) had the most effect on drink drive rates.

As for why a train company, perhaps because there is a major problem with sexual assault on trains, even rape on crowded trains with people not stopping it.

“It doesn't follow that all men therefore need to be told not to rape people.” but all women need warned to protect themselves from potential rape? The video I posted does a good job I think of showing how we are all responsible in ending misogyny and rape culture.

“no one wants to see us going back to the days when women wearing short skirts were said to be 'asking for it'” that's still now, trust me attend rape trials and you'll see it in practice. Judges who don't sentence because the victim ‘shouldnt’ have been drunk, provocatively dressed, ‘flirting’ etc

OnlyLovers · 16/02/2016 12:33

Also, why has there never been a poster aimed at men saying something like "Look after your mates- if you think one of them is going to sexually assault someone- stop him"

Such a good point, Bertrand.

BertrandRussell · 16/02/2016 12:36

I wonder if it's because some women just can't think about the possibility that a man they know might be a rapist, so it's easier to insist that a) men don't need to be told, and b) women are ultimately responsible for men's behaviour anyway?

TooOldForGlitter · 16/02/2016 12:36

I would bloody love to see a poster like that ^^

TooOldForGlitter · 16/02/2016 12:41

Yes I think you're right there Bertrand. I also think there's an element of othering, I said the same last night. These other women are slappers and risk takers and they flirted with him anyway so they asked for it. The 'good' women won't get raped because they follow the rules society has imposed on us.

MackerelOfFact · 16/02/2016 12:42

I've blanked out the text on this National Rail ad from 2012.

Does anyone want to have a guess what it originally said? I'm just curious.

To find this poster in a train station wrong?
TooOldForGlitter · 16/02/2016 12:44

Something to do with the height of her heels I'm guessing. She can't run away if she's wearing those silly shoes can she. ffs.

AlpacaMyThings · 16/02/2016 12:47

What worries me are there are so many people who have an issue with this when we should all agree any message to stay safe has to be a good thing.

It appears there are too any offended feminists who are prepared for a young woman to come to harm because they don't agree with the message the poster is giving.

I don't know Cambridge RAILWAY station, but associate it with the university. There could be hundreds of young girls away from home for the first time and this message acts as a reminder to stay safe.

LumpySpacedPrincess · 16/02/2016 12:53

90% of rapists are known to the victim, how does the vague "stay safe wimmin" poster help exactly as it doesn't address the problem, at all. Confused

JeanneDeMontbaston · 16/02/2016 12:55

Why should we all agree, alpaca? Confused

You're saying 'what worries me is people who disagree with me, disagree with me', basically.

Plenty of us don't agree, not because we're 'prepared for a young woman to come to harm', but because we believe that this poster will cause harm. Do you actually not understand that we're saying that, or are you trying to pretend you didn't understand so you can twist what's been said? I'm sorry, I know that sounds quite aggressive, but I just can't get my mind around how badly you've misrepresented what people are saying.

I do know Cambridge train station, and yes, there are lots of young women in the area. They don't need to be encouraged to believe rape myths.

JeanneDeMontbaston · 16/02/2016 12:56

(Oh, and FWIW, there are two universities in Cambridge. While we're being pedantic in an irrelevant and nit-picking way.)

BertrandRussell · 16/02/2016 12:57

"It appears there are too any offended feminists who are prepared for a young woman to come to harm because they don't agree with the message the poster is giving."

Bloody hell! That really is an extraordinarily stupid statement.

LumpySpacedPrincess · 16/02/2016 12:58

Alpaca, 85% of sexual assault isn't even reported and posters like this contribute to that. The facts show that we have got it very wrong when it comes to rape, surely you can see that?

TooOldForGlitter · 16/02/2016 12:58

Ah, now we're offended feminists too. Yay.

JeanneDeMontbaston · 16/02/2016 12:59

It does infuriate me that 'offended feminists' are constantly treated as the enemies of other women. You know, feminists get raped too, right? Some feminists even get into feminism because they want to do something about rape culture.

LumpySpacedPrincess · 16/02/2016 13:00

The fact that women don't report assault and when they do the conviction rape is laughable offends me a lot.

Consider me an offended feminist.

TooOldForGlitter · 16/02/2016 13:02

"Some feminists even get into feminism because they want to do something about rape culture"

Yup, that'd be me!

ghostyslovesheep · 16/02/2016 13:04

I am amazed that people actually think that without a poster young 'girls' wont know about the threat of sexual assault and rape - I mean they have all been locked away from society until that point right? Hmm

and comparing it to a campaign aimed at CHILDREN - really?

Women are fully functioning human beings with brains and everything

I'll ask again WHY DO THEY NEED POSTERS TO EDUCATE THEM

limitedperiodonly · 16/02/2016 13:05

These are the only kind of posters I want to see about behaviour on public transport

ghostyslovesheep · 16/02/2016 13:06

yep one of the main motivations for working with Rape Crisis for over 10 years was my feminism - I wanted to support other women through the trauma of rape and abuse - fucking dangerous feminist that I am - and proud

Pollyputhtekettleon · 16/02/2016 13:08

I think we have to accept that as women we are a greater target. That is not our fault but it is our responsibility. It's important that we understand that and protect ourselves accordingly. We can't control what other people do but you wouldn't leave your house unlocked anymore than you would (or should) wander down a dark alley alone, and this is especially the case as a woman. I'm am a feminist but do accept there are physical and biological reasons why we are more vulnerable. Its not about victim blaming! It's about keeping in mind your own safety and vulnerability. I do think very drunk men are also quite vulnerable so if it's about alcohol (which it doesn't say it is) then I think it would be appropriate to include men in the poster.

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