To be nervous about spending this money on the house?

[Ughnotagain]

We moved into our house July 2014. Since we moved in we haven't done much really - repainted the living room and decorated a room for DD, that's about it.

With the bad weather recently it's become apparent that the front of the house needs repointing. We're also going to decorate the hallway, stairs and landing, and re-do the spare bedroom and get some big wardrobes in there for storage. Plus new carpets for living room, halfway/stairs, possibly DD's room and spare room.

Budget for everything is about £4,500. We have the money there to do it but I just feel so nervous about spending it! It was the same when we paid for our wedding. So anxious about handing over such big sums of money (and our wedding was cheap compared to some people's!).

The money we have is from an inheritance so it's not even money we've saved up, but... I think part of the issue is that it makes everything seem so permanent. Obviously when we bought the house that was a big step, but this work seems like it'll tie us here that bit longer. Like it seems definite now that we'll be here at least another 5 years. I do like the house though we do have loud gobshitey neighbours but it's not our "forever home" I don't think. But we can't live in a shit falling-to-bits house until we are able to find our forever house can we?

I think I'm being a bit silly.

I know exactly how you feel, you're not being daft. We've just moved into our first owned house and total spend for doing it up is about 16k, which is what we paid under the asking price. We've been saving for years for exactly this but I still felt that spending it was unnecessarily extravagant for some irrational reason. We've never really spent any big money on anything before apart from a car.
I knocked a chunk off the utility room so we could have a door going straight into the garden which didn't NEED doing but now I love it and it was totally the right thing to do.
Enjoy your new house, it will be nicer when you have it the way you want it.

It's what most people do when they move into a new home, put their own stamp on it and enjoy living in it.
Sometimes paying for big stuff can be a bit scary but a sensible way to spend your inheritance imo.

Youremywifenow that's exactly it, it feels extravagant! Even though it's totally not.

I think it's just because I've never had to do this kind of thing before. It feels very very grown up!

It can be a bit scary to spend large amounts of money, but investing in needed maintenance such as the pointing, and gradually working through room decorating is what comes with the territory of home ownership. After all, even if you don't plan to stay too long, you won't be able to sell if it doesn't look like you've looked after it.
would it help to break it down in to the individual jobs.... the pointing is £x... doing the hall/stairs/landing is £y..... new living room carpet is £z....etc. ?

BackforGood yeah, that's exactly what DH says.

I've written a list. The pointing is definitely the biggest job so once that's done and paid for I'll probably feel a bit better!

Yes, it's the grown-up-ness and becoming 'proper' which is scary. I had a sleepless night before the builders knocked the wall down as it just seemed so drastic. We've spent 20 years living like students in rented houses which always had stuff wrong with them and making do rather than having it the way I wanted it. I now own a dishwasher and tumble dryer for the first time (still in boxes in the hall, but they are mine and they represent a major upgrade in lifestyle).
I'm now really excited about making it lovely now the major stuff is almost done.
Most of our stuff is still in boxes though. I go on mat leave in 2 weeks so will unpack now we have furniture to put stuff in.

It can be terrifying handing over a lump sum of cash. YANBU at all, especially not if you like the security of a bit put by for a rainy day.
Remind yourself the house will be easier to sell if the work has been done.

Maintaining a home doesn't mean that you've made a lifetime commitment to it. It would be foolish not to do the pointing - you may as well take a few chunks out with a sledgehammer every so often, as you're effectively damaging your home (and your investment in it) by neglecting that.

Also, having it redecorated makes it nicer for you to live in, and easier to sell. If you do a good job of it, you can even add value, or at least save a lot of hassle over negotiating price etc when/if you sell it.

For the sake of not having too much mess at once, I'd suggest doing the pointing first, then the interior stuff later.

Unless you have a deliberate policy of watching the house disintegrate and devalue around you, you do need to do some maintenance and decorating every so often.

neglecting the place so the water comes in means you are LOSING money. Unmaintained houses are hard to sell and worth less as buyers think that there are probably a lot of other hidden problems.

at least sort the pointing.

if you don't want to pay for maintenance - that's what rentals are for.

It can be terrifying handing over large amounts of money for maintanence and improvements but once it's done its a great feeling. We have just spent 2 years renovating our house and spent around £100k but it's definitely been worth it. Not only have we a beautiful house but it's now more energy efficient, has no leaks, is more comfortable, looks and works better, oh and is worth more than when we started (although as we aren't planning to sell that doesn't really matter)
I'd say to make sure you are happy with what you are getting, get quotes (at least 3) and ask for references/recommendations and examples of previous work done.

specialsubject I didn't say I don't want to maintain it just that I'm nervous/anxious about spending so much money. It's not something I've ever had to do before.

yes, you did, you bought the place and signed up for a much, much, bigger debt.

CBA with the oversensitive MN type. Especially ones who spend large amounts on frilly-frock day.

welcome to real life. Bye.

When you say handing over, are you paying people to do it so literally coughing up 4.5K? We do ours ourselves, spent the weekend putting coving up and patching up walls. Amazing how much you don't notice all the trips to B&Q adding up! I wouldn't know what we've spent (and wouldn't want to add it up). I do know what you mean, but I've also found it less painful as we've not handed over big lumps to anyone else it's been dribs and drabs here and there (aside from 2K on electrics..!).

specialsubject lolz yeah alright My frilly frock cost £150. Jog on.

jevoudrais bit of both really. We're going to do what we can ourselves. We have high ceilings as it's an old terraced house so some of the decorating we're getting someone in as don't fancy balancing over the stairs (3 floors so double staircase kind of thing). Getting someone in to do plastering and pointing. But the basic stuff we'll be doing.

Maintaining a house does cost money, there's no avoiding it. Think of the value you'll be adding when it comes to selling. We'll have spent around £10k when ours is done, refurbishing every room. But we bought it for £15k under the asking price, and it's gone up a further £15k in value, and we're paying off the mortgage. So all in all it seems like quite a sensible way to spend money!

think of it an an investment

if you don't keep the lace spruced up to a certain level, it will depreciate in value and when you want to sell in the future the outlay (or fall in price) will be much more

we are currently doing u our kitchen, dining room and back sitting room from scratch

I reckon it will be 15k in total. But we will be here at least another 8-10 years I reckon (teen kids not looking like they are heading off anywhere any time soon...) so I want to live in nice surroundings

*place

I understand the reluctance. I inherited a significant amount from my dad, and I've been really cautious about spending it, because I know how hard he worked to save it and I know it would be difficult for me to replace it. I find it much easier to spend money I've earned because I can see where it's come from and how I can put it back. I could draw up reasonably accurate accounts from memory for what I've used Dad's money for over 7 years, and all of it was purposeful although only the house repairs were absolutely essential. I almost feel as though I have to be able to account to him for it.

It's an investment. Property is rising in price. Spending the money doesn't have to make things permanent. It could also make the house easier to sell.

Definitely and investment, although it is massively scary handing over thousands.

If it's any help, I had nightmares over forking out nearly 6k for a posh kitchen and bathroom in my old house. But I got £25k more than I expected when I sold it!

HippyPottyMouth that's interesting because I think I feel the same in a way. If it was money I'd saved specifically for that purpose I'd have no worries in spending it!

I know it is an investment and it's better for us in the long run. And it will be nicer and worth it once its all done. It will be good not to have to worry about water getting in next time there's a storm!

I am an old gimmer and have lived in several houses. My biggest regrets have been NOT spending money EARLIER. So in 2 or 3 houses, we didn't spend the money while we lived in the house, then spent a fortune doing it up in order to sell it - all the time thinking: "why the hell didn't we make it look like this for the past 4 years while were living here?"

Spend the money, enjoy living there. You're worth it x

I understand where you are coming from. We bought a long term home a year ago and it needs money spent on it. I'm due a significant chunk of back pay that would allow us to do the most pressing things, make good a loft conversion, new boiler, update a bathroom. It's scary to think that I'll spend all my money on the house, just like that (am snapping fingers here, btw), so I question "should we"? But it needs done, we can afford it and it'll make the house work better for us, so I think it would be silly not too. Even more silly not to spend on jobs that, left undone, could cause damage to the house.
But when you've never been flush, it's natural to feel anxious about big spends I think.