To think that everything has to be a 'thing'

[Abbinob]

These days?
E.g
Going to a mates house to play = play date
Feeding baby bits off your plate = baby led weaning.
Baby playing with bowl of rice = sensory play
No one goes on a diet anymore they make a "lifestyle change"
A coffee can't even be a coffee anymore it has to be a mochalattaoohlala. At home! At home!! Wheres the nescafe!?

Maybe Im uneducated or something but jeez

I agree with most of these, but attachment parenting is something specific.

If your baby sleeps in a cot in his own bedroom, goes everywhere in a pram, both parents work from baby being a few weeks old, you get your baby on a routine early on, then you are not attachment parents.

Doesn't matter because your child will be fine, but that is not attachment parenting.

emilybohemia There is a mum at DS' school who insists her kids call her mama, it's so cringey walking behind them on the school run!

Dear all....

Re: minibeasts

I've looked this up and seems like I have to eat humble pie. Apparently it's a genuine term for invertebrates that aren't insects.

I guess when I heard it I just assumed it was just yet another example of the general trend towards the infantilising and commodifying of language.

O tempora O mores... I feel old!

Don't get me started on my other pet hates. "Serving suggestion" is one. There are five separate reasons why that pisses me off.

Mancave.

No. It's just the room where you've put your xbox, fridge of beers, and pictures/books etc that your partner won't tolerate anywhere else.

Over - stimulated = had enough
Face time = chatting to someone

If I see #BLW again I will fucking choke someone. The hash tag gives me unreasonable amounts of rage.

You have to admit, Americans are the best at that kinda shit though : baby shower, meditation whatever the fuck.

Also, whilst I'm at it - biggest waste of fuck time ever = Baby Yoga.

Engagement photoshoot - why???!

Everyone goes on a 'journey' these days. It's never 'i had a great time ' it's ' I've had an amazing journey ' - you started working here as a secretary, you're still a secretary - you haven't been anywhere!!!!

What in actual hell is a wet coffee? or is it code for something porny

I think I must be a generally narked person because virtually all of the things mentioned so far irk me.

Particulars:

• Forever home
• Photos of food on social media
• Social media statuses bragging about how far they've just run - the "I may be slow, but I'm lapping everyone on the couch" BS particularly infuriates me
• Parents who say they are 'babysitting' for their own child
• 'Won the internet' - wtf?!?!
• Off of e.g. Take it off of the table
• Hacks - they are tips

hand-cooked crisps - wtf???

I keep imagining some poor sod dunking individual crisps into a fryer ffs.

load of guff

I've nodded along and laughed at so many of these posts. It's like lots of 21st century Victor Meldrews gathered together

Bangs=Fringe

I'm still calling it my fringe...

Clarice bangs & fringes are actually different things

the food related ones remind me of how every single ingredient has to be listed on the name of the food. As in not fish, chips and veg but "gently seared sea bass with a chunky chipped potatoes, accompanied by a mix of seasonal vegetables, on a bed of 7 types of lettuce, with a creamy tartare sauce and a jus of freshly squeezed lemon".

Bloody starving hungry by the time you get to the end of the menu!

NoCapes Really?? What's the difference? My fringe sort of parts in the middle but it's quite a heavy fringe.

Minibeast isn't in my dictionary from the late 80s. The schools here have used it instead of invertebrate and have included insects within the term.

Invertebrate is a fine word for children to learn. They seem to manage complicated terms for dinosaurs ok!

Bangs are cut into a centre parting to form those kind of curtains to frame the face
A fringe is brought forward to cut so no parting and just covers the forehead

Adding to my list:
Reached out - it's just talking to someone
Squad - your friends (or bunch of randoms your pretending are your best friends for your selfie pics from your night out you spent mostly on your phone!!!)
Goals - usually just a lot of nonsense that is of no interest to anyone
The posting of every detail of a workout, trip to the shops or meal out with twenty hashtags,
#sorrynotsorry - what does this even mean?!
The names for storms for non-hurricane weather

Sanpro....do people really say it.... Actually out loud...

Ha I just came on to add SanPro - inspired by another thread
Hate it!

Sanpro just seems to be a mn term its irritating to read though

Yes to all of the above!

Date night
Meds
Play date
Hash tags

All of it!

'Reach out'. Only acceptable if you are a member of The Four Tops.

Also, 'fun architect' and 'mumtrepreneur' - ban these heinous terms/words immediately.

Sanpro is the standard term in the manufacturing and retail sectors.

And it's a heck of a lot shorter to say or type that 'sanitary towels (disposable and washable) panty liners, tampons (with and without applicator), cups and natural sponges etc'

toffee a wet latte is a latte without the foam. I have been known to order one because I grudge paying for air in suspension. And there's no point in foam in a takeaway cup. Please don't throw me off the thread though, I promise I don't curate the beans....

Rock or rocking when it's used to describe someone wearing something.

Super, as in super-excited.