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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to know how much of your pregnancy you put on Social Media?

109 replies

YouAreAWizardHarry · 01/02/2016 20:29

I'm posting here as I have a strong opinion on everything Grin but haven't ever given this any thought, and AIBU is full of strong opinions Grin

I am pregnant with DC1, and have seen a number of people mention they don't like scan pictures on FB - why?

I'm quite private on social media due to my job, but had though of putting one scan picture on, and then announcing the birth (no thousand statuses about pregnancy in between). Im also conscious of a particular friend struggling to conceive at the moment, but live over 100 miles from family so still want to share some.

How much did you share and why/why not?

OP posts:
Ineedtimeoff · 01/02/2016 20:42

a lot. it was a big deal for me. one I wanted to share with family and friends some of whom lived in different countries/spread out over the UK. I shared what I was happy showing. I'm sure some got bored of my posts. They always had the option of scrolling on by or hiding my posts. No biggie in my opinion.

x2boys · 01/02/2016 20:43

Ds1 was born in 2006 and I wasent 9n facebook ds2 born in 2010 and I only went on Facebook just before he was born my dsis announced his birth which is fair enough as we have a lot of relatives 9n facebook and at the time I only had about five facebook friends.

AbbeyRoadCrossing · 01/02/2016 20:43

Announced after 25 weeks with both. No scan pictures though. I just don't want my uterus and personal details on Facebook - some even put them as profile pics so not even limited to just friends. But each to their own

AbbeyRoadCrossing · 01/02/2016 20:43

Although if you count mumsnet as social media absolutely everything Grin

OvariesBeforeBrovaries · 01/02/2016 20:44

Unpopular opinion but lots Grin

Scan picture at 12 weeks, 20 weeks and 28 weeks. Lots of whining about glucose tolerance tests and being the size of a planet. I even blogged about it all prepared for the MN lynch mob . Practically live-Facebooked my induction because everyone was messaging me constantly asking for updates. Birth announcement.

I liked sharing it. My family all live hours away so it was nice to keep them involved, and I was the first of my friends to have a baby so they all a) had an unusual level of fascination in the whole thing and b) were super protective of us as a family and christened my baby "the course baby" (I was pregnant/had a newborn while at uni).

LBOCS2 · 01/02/2016 20:44

I put up my 12 weeks scan pic as an announcement and the odd post relating to pregnancy over the remaining 6 months. I do post on Facebook quite a lot though in general. I didn't post any bump pics though!

This. Mostly my pregnancy related comments are related to hideous maternity wear and my inability to paint my own toenails anymore.

MintyBojingles · 01/02/2016 20:44

Post to announce, couple random pregnant statuses, then announce the birth. I think people like to know, but not be inundated. I had one friend who posted daily how many weeks/days to go, every little symptom etc. It was tedious, I had to unfollow. Generally I do like seeing when people are expecting. Just not daily updates Confused

PunkrockerGirl · 01/02/2016 20:45

God no, absolutely nothing. There are appropriate ways of announcing births and deaths. Social media isn't one or them.
Good luck with your pregnancy OP Flowers

Original poster
YouAreAWizardHarry · 01/02/2016 20:46

Ha Polly I was suprised by the amount of men who post pregnancy/birth things on LinkedIn...

On a side note Oyster have you found anywhere decent that isn't all pink and blue? It's driving me mad already. I know h and m are alright.

NHS I have someone who does that when talking in RL Grin.

I don't think either way is bad to be honest, but good to know I'm about middle.

OP posts:
Chillyegg · 01/02/2016 20:46

I didn't put anything on social media what so ever. I don't regret it at all.

Facebook of for fun pictures of food and friends and gatherings.
No one needs to know about my sciatica or how many stretch marks I have. Also now I'm aware of how things can change so quickly during pregnancy I don't want others to know all my business if times are tough

Chocolatecakefan · 01/02/2016 20:46

I didn't mention either, couldn't be arsed really as everyone I knew in RL knew so didn't really see the need....
I find scan pics a bit odd as basically they all look the same anyway, plus I didn't really want to post pictures of my insides!! Haha

Announced the birth with a few pics, prob only put on half a dozen or so photos of her since, so hardly prolific

goodnightdarthvader1 · 01/02/2016 20:47

Oyster Me too! I've been known to rant about the division of "boys" and "girls" clothes sections in Boots, stereotypes on gender reveal cakes, and boys/girls toys. Had to unfollow BabyGaga on fb as there was so much gender stereotyping shit Angry

Mothersruin75 · 01/02/2016 20:47

I had numerous Ivf attempts, on my 5th cycle I became pregnant with twins. No scan pictures just a simple one liner at 20 weeks saying both babies doing well then nothing pregnancy related until the birth. I went onto have a further child naturally very quickly after & only posted the birth announcement (after sil had already posted it - but that's another story).

SockQueen · 01/02/2016 20:48

Having struggled with TTC for over a year, it hurt just as much finding out someone was pregnant whether it was via a scan photo or a birth announcement. I don't really object to either, but massive oversharing and endless updates will make me unfollow people.

I'm now 8/40 and don't plan on posting anything until the birth, if all goes well. Sure, if I'm in photos before then with a bump, I'm ok with that and people might work it out, but that's all.

jusdepamplemousse · 01/02/2016 20:48

I'm 35 weeks and none so far. I cringe at most preggo posts I see and therefore don't kid myself...!

Pacothepidgeon · 01/02/2016 20:54

Don't plan on announcing anything on facebook until the birth. Everyone I want to see a photo of the scan will be shown it in person.

jaykay34 · 01/02/2016 20:56

I didn't post anything at all.

I had several other Facebook friends who were pregnant at the same time and were posting announcements/scan pics etc, but I never felt the need.

For me, pregnancy is a very personal thing and full of uncertainty. As I hadn't realised I was pregnant for 14 weeks due to having periods, I was convinced something was probably wrong.

I got outed, when a distant relative posted on my wall "Have you had the baby yet?". She has no privacy settings and her posts to me seem to be seen by all my friends - so I then had an influx of messages from people saying "OMG. .are you pregnant ?". Thankfully I had given birth that morning to a perfectly healthy little boy and I didn't mind then sharing the news. I would have been pretty pissed off had I still been pregnant though.

Dachshund · 01/02/2016 20:57

I don't have Facebook so no 'statuses' and I actually only posted a bump pic at 20 weeks or so because we got engaged and I realised I'd announced that with a ring pic and not even mentioned the baby which to me was far more exciting!

Then nothing really until she was born, and quite a few pics since then I have to confess (well she is the world's cutest baby Grin)

Spudlet · 01/02/2016 20:57

I put a status up to say I was pregnant (no pics) then stuck mostly to mentioning it in a humorous way - how much I was enjoying scaring people with wicked braxton-hicks, for instance...

Put a pic of the boy up when he arrived, since then (all of 5 weeks) I've been trying not to turn into someone who only posts baby things! Quite hard as I have no life outside him right now, so I'm just not posting much.

CalleighDoodle · 01/02/2016 21:04

No scan photos. They are the inside of my uterus and not for 100 people to see Grin

Announced dd pregnancy at 20 weeks, a few (covered) bump shots, birth announcement.
Had ds pregnancy mentioned on fb by a friend, which snowballed, at 32 weeks. A couple of covered bump Shots and birth announcement.

I dont get the whole posting photos in underwear, or the photo of just after the birth with naked baby and half naked woman. Would these people normally let 100+ people see them in that state?

Each to their own.

TrollTheRespawnJeremy · 01/02/2016 21:05

I put absolutely nothing on. I didn't want to be defined as a 'pregnant woman'. I keep my family stuff seperate. Social media is generally for business/sharing opinions

madsaz76 · 01/02/2016 21:14

Facebook silence here too - even had to have a few conversations with my sister who overshares everything.

Took us a while to conceive and seeing other peoples stuff can be hard - I was concious I had no idea who out there was struggling to come to terms with fertility or losses.

I'm also an older first timer and felt like the chances of something going wrong were high so didn't want to share just in case. THe further on I get the less that really mattters, but just feels like we are not doing a facebook pregnancy now.

Baby due next week - when he/she eventually turns up we will share a picture. I will probably ruin all my discipline and be ridiculously over the top with photos and stuff. If people vaguely mention stuff on my profile now I don't remove (I was doing early on) but it just feels like I need a baby in my arms before I am going to start posting

I don't think there are any rules, but I do think OTT facebook sharing risks turning people off or causing distress that is almost certainly not intended.

Spotsondots · 01/02/2016 21:17

I didn't post with previous pregnancy and won't with any future pregnancies either. I have experienced endless scan photos and pregnancy statuses when struggling to conceive/during miscarriage. It really got me down. So I guess for me, I am not a fan of posting because you never know what others are struggling with. (I also hate making announcements in general so would happily just let people find out as and when).

Osirus · 01/02/2016 21:21

20 weeks here. Not posted anything about it but I don't really post anything else either!

Faye12345 · 01/02/2016 21:22

I know a girl who posts picture after picture of scan,clothes,names etc. I get shes happy but really? Its overkill and quite a few people have unfollowed herConfused