To be really irritated by the 'motherhood challenge'

[Kitkatmonster]

I'm sure you've seen it, it's taking over my news feed. I seem to be the only one who thinks this is a nonsense, and a bit worrying as the number of photos of Friends of Friends' children that I've seen this weekend is actually scary. Does no one lock their page down as private anymore?! Aibu in getting irritated and wondering how many women have shed a tear secretly over seeing this, the ones battling infertility, having accepted infertility, the ones right now miscarrying a longed for baby. It seems insensitive and crass, who needs to post photos to the fb world that make them happy to be a mother? What about the mum with PND who gets inadvertently tagged? Isn't something like this likely to make her feel pretty rubbish? Are we all just so selfish and desperate to show off our perfect families that we have to take a 'challenge' like this without any concern for the people among our friends who might be experiencing one of the above? Seriously, AIBU? Am I taking this too seriously and getting irritated by a bit of fun?! It's really fucking bothering me.

[99percentchocolate]

Not hospital - prison! Sorry!

[expatinscotland]

I never participate in these things and don't like them. My DD1 died when she was 9, 3.5 years ago. So I really hate things like this TimeHop and that memory shit. I also emigrated here well into adulthood, so all photos of my childhood and early adulthood at thousands of miles away at my parents' house and long before everyone had a camera at the ready. I also don't own a smartphone so all my photos have to be downloaded from my old, crap camera.

I have a memory. It's called a mind. I don't need to fucking put it everywhere.

YANBU.

[TheSeptemberIssue]

I'm finding it all a bit hard too. It's fine to post about your kids, yes people expect that and I do love seeing how friends children are doing, but this seems to be every single thing on my newsfeed right now and it just makes me feel a bit empty and useless as someone who hasn't managed to have a child yet

[tellmelies]

When did procreating become something which women are proud of, as if it was something unusual or a major achievement? Don't get me wrong, I love my DD more than life itself but I'm only doing what most women who ever lived have done. I don't expect a pat on back.

Exactly.

[tinofbiscuits]

YANBU

[tellmelies]

At least it reveals the weirdos so I can hide them

[ThumbWitchesAbroad]

Haven't seen it yet, but will be ignoring it when I do. Like all those FB PM bollocks ones, that say "You are a wonderful mother etc. etc. blah blah now send this on to 10 more wonderful women and I expect to get it back too!"
Shameless bollocks.

[PurpleDaisies]

I feel the same theseptemberissur. I wouldn't expect anyone not to take part but I'm not liking it. It isn't the photos of the children, it the motherhood club aspect.

[Sallystyle]

Can I suggest people don't post pictures of their fathers on father's day because it hurts like fuck to see all these good dads when mine is a sociopath who wants nothing to do with me, and my children lost theirs.

No, I suck it up and don't tell people that celebrating their relationship with their dad is hurtful to those of us without one. I don't belong in that father and daughter 'club' but I don't think people are being insensitive for celebrating that day on FB.

The 'challenge' is a bit silly but to say it is insensitive isn't really fair. I am sure my children feel a moment of pain when they hear/read people moaning about their dads because they would love to have theirs back.

Everything you post on FB has the ability to be insensitive to someone. When my SN child couldn't talk for bloody years I found it hard when people spoke about how they wish their child would give them some peace and stop talking, but I realised it was my problem.

[Highsteaks]

How is it a 'challenge' to put up yet more pictures of you with your kids?

It's just part of this whole 'no one ever managed to raise a child before Facebook' thing.

Fuck. Off.

[RaptorInaPorkPieHat]

I've just untagged myself from a friends post.

Teenage DD is going through a difficult phase for 2 years right now (my friends know I'm struggling) and the last thing I feel like doing is putting up photos and pretending like I'm a wonderful mother (That, and I've never done airy fairy shit like this on FB anyway)

[WorraLiberty]

I'd actually like to challenge my niece and my friend's daughter, to go 1 hour without posting photos of their kids...

[LittleLionMansMummy]

My 6yo niece was an IVF baby. I struggled with fertility for 2 years before finally falling pregnant. My other sister had 5 failed IVF attempts before adopting my two fabulous nephews. The photos I posted were all of ds with his cousins. I'll post what I bloody well like - hide my posts or de-friend me if it bothers you, just like I do with God botherers, racists and homophobes etc.

[JustAnotherYellowBelly]

Posting photos of kids? Fine.
It being every other post on your news feed? Not fine.

Sometimes, though, I think it's my age and the fact I'm a small town girl...

[tinofbiscuits]

Has anyone ever seen a challenge to support people with fertility problems?

[chicken2015]

YANBU theseptemberissie that is how I'm feeling, been trying for over a year, and finding it hard also like I'm not part of motherhood which is like a failure as won't be able to be nominated

[Oldraver]

I just thought 'oh here we go again'. My mad SIL was the first one to do it but only nominated three people..obviously she doesn't think anyone else in the family are good mothers

I did think it had the potential to piss people off who are into this type of thing who dont get nominated

[60sname]

FFS it's just some social media guff, jump on the bandwagon, or ignore as you see fit.

[IreallyKNOWiamright]

I find these things quite offensive because if no one nominates you it makes you wonder why!!!!

[LovelyFriend]

I do see this on FB (just via 1 or 2 people) but they know better than to nominate me for such a thing.

I treat it with the same disinterest as I would an 'amen' or 'pass it on ' post.

Not. For. Me. Cheers.

[Philoslothy]

I really do not get the FB angst on here, surely it is lovely to see your friends sharing lovely memories. I have had miscarriages, PND and my eldest had repeatedly attempted suicide or been violent towards me because of his special needs. I can still enjoy watching others share special memories.

I have been tagged - I suspect because I have lots of children rather than because I am a particularly good parent. I shared pictures representing my parental failings - I had a lot of choice!

[LovelyFriend]

I also ignore all the "share if you love your daughter/mother/etc" shite.

Never forget you can edit and to some extent control your own fb experience.

[woollytights]

I disagree with the points about offending people who aren't mothers. How does anyone cope in the real world if they can't bear the sight of a child?