boys are like dogs?!!

[waitingforsomething]

Text a mum friend today who had a 2 DS one the same age as my dd (3) to see if they wanted to pop over for a play. She text me back to say she thought she would go to the playground because 'boys are like dogs and need to run'. I said Dd loves and needs a run around too (true) but it was Raining...she then said I didn't understand because Dd is a girl and she doesn't need it and I don't know how hard it is to have boys only. I am so lucky that DD will so quiet stuff sometimes and I will apparently understand when my DS learns to walk....
Aibu to think she's being a bit silly? Are boys really so different to girls? She is right that my DS is still a baby so perhaps I don't know but as far as I can tell all young children need a good airing....for some reason I'm dwelling on this and not sure why ...

No, you're wrong. I think it's quite acceptable to notice that a lot o boys have trouble sitting still for a long time. It would be unacceptable to not expect them to because of it.

(My post was to Culture)

insistance not insurance

How about we look at each child as an individual and notice what they need rather than rely on stereotypes, assumptions etc based on gender.

Someone said that to me after I had my son - "boys are like dogs, they just need food and exercise".

I asked if that were not true of girls too, or I had been missing a trick all these years by not just watering my daughter like a plant.

Three boys here, and a collie with boundless energy. I can indeed vouch for the fact that all three of my children and girl collie dog indeed need to be run each and every day or they go batshit crazy and torment the living hell out of me.

I'm firmly of the opinion that this may well indeed be more than a gender thing - all children are individuals and deserve to be treated as such.

I may well have three girls who need the same or one boy who likes to chill while the others want to knock hell out of each other for three hours.

I don't think you should get too hung up on it - I have said such things myself to people, more because I know how much energy my dog needs to use up daily and also as a kind of semi-apology to others as to how ba-shit crazy my kids are.

They are happier after they have been run!

It's completely daft, and a bit dangerous.

"The reason why bots are like that is because people indulge it in boys and punish it in girls."

^^

This is true.

I used to take my dd swimming when she was a toddler (I still do, but that's irrelevant). She liked to "run" (but which I really mean toddle) around the edge of the pool rather than being in the pool. Usually we got told off for this and similar non-conformist stuff. Climbing out and jumping back in etc.

One day I forgot her usual (pink) swim nappy and had to buy a new one at the pool, which happened to be blue. No one complained about her toddling round the edge or any other such mucking about. She could have got away with murder in it. It was a complete eye opener.

But in answer to the question, I have found that both of mine (girl and boy) need to run off their energy during the day, especially when very small.

If anything DD had more energy to release that DS but both have a lot. She was like a frustrated ball of energy wanting to take on the world before she could walk, where as DS, although energetic, is calmer and more relaxed.

I have two older DDs and a younger DS. I used to think it was all gender stereotyping before I had my DS. We haven't raised them at all differently - DS is very fond of a pink tutu and high heels just as the girls are fond of going outside and getting muddy. However, there is a marked difference in DS's behaviour if he HASN'T spent at least 20 mins running around outside somewhere. He really is like a dog - give him three meals a day and some exercise and he's as happy as Larry (who must have been an awfully happy chappy). The girls can not go outside for a few days to play (if it's horrible weather) and they'll not behave any differently at all. My DS is on the go all the time, always active, always very physical, simply cannot sit still at all!

Samosa you have 2 who don't need exercise and 1 who is calm after only 20 minutes? Gosh I have 3 and can't imagine having such laid back kids. It definitely must make you're life easier, I am jealous!

I don't like generalising boys and girls, mostly because you can see all types of behaviour in both genders. However I have never witnessed (neither have my friends with DDs) the utter pumped up, energy flowing through every pore and cell, crazy jumping running behaviour in my boys when they were 4-6 at the end of the day, if they hadn't had enough activity. We have to give DS2 physical challenges like planking or Street dancing otherwise he'd literally be jumping off the sofa for an hour after teatime. I have never seen anything like it in a lot of girls that I know, including lots of physically strong, active types.

Jamin, I take dd for a 3 mile walk every Saturday, the same route. We often have to leave by 7am! In the holidays I was in the park by 8am nearly every morning. We have no choice unfortunately.

And what your children do from tea mine often starts at 5/6am!

I have two boys and although they are both pretty active there is also a big personality difference. One is quite happy to draw, be read to and other calmer and potentially indoor activities. Second needs less sleep, bounces on the spot if he isn't running and runs in circles around things when outside... I struggle to tire him out enough and he really doesn't want to spend time drawing etc. If they were both like my second I would fully subscribe to the stereotype but I can see the obvious personality difference. We also have a friend with 2 dd and the same split with one calmer and more activity focussed and one very phsically active.

Our antenatal course group, we have 2,5 year olds now and whenever we meet up, there really isn't a boy/girl divide. They all run around, they all draw and do some crafts, some are more energetic than others (the most active ones incidentally are girls).

I do agree though that the same behaviour is encouraged in ine gender and discouraged in other, since birth if not before. Of course kids are influenced by this.

Even if you think are raising your children gender neutrally, the influences are there in the outside world.

Strangers on the street used to stop me and want to discuss how I was "in trouble" with my boy, but I'd be relieved when they were a teenager, boys need so much exercise, they remembered how their boys were exactly like mine, their girls were so much easier.

Problem is, DD is a girl. She got constantly told to her face, that no, she wasn't, she was a boy. She used to get stopped on the street and asked if she's been at her sister's clothes, and not in a nice way. She even got harassed (as a 2 year old!) in a swimming pool once because she was wearing a one-piece costume. They pick this stuff up and next time, they want to wear something different because they remember the mean comments.

Strangers will praise your boy for "boy" behaviour, and react negatively if they display girl behaviour. It's pervasive and endemic. Dress your boy in a pink t-shirt for the day, and you'd be surprised how peoples expectations change, as pp said.

I think the average boy is more physical and energetic than the average girl.
However it is a real shame if people do criticise girls when the wrestle and take part in rough and tumble play. Because just because the average boy is more physical than the average boy that doesn't mean lots of girls won't love rough and tumble play (and lots of boys will be very gentle too).

On a side note my cousins kids are interesting (both boys). Their parents are ridiculously cautious, all I ever hear from both of them is "boys be careful" etc etc. So their two boys are now terrified of the stairs & dogs (and other stuff too). They do however play fight almost constantly. The cautious ans constant be careful / be gentle doesn't seem to have had much effect on their energy levels.

This drives me mad. My Dd is terrible at sitting quietly and doing a craft or colouring or whatever. If it's raining too hard to go out, the house is turned into an assault course. My bf and I are both pretty active so that's how we've bought her up - at this age (5) it's nurture, not nature.

My ds is the laziest, most laid back child I've ever met. Nothing like a dog whatsoever, and run?!? My god I'm lucky if I even get him to walk 5 mins to the shop with me and he's 4. My dd on the other hand constantly needs to be in motion, is excessively loud (but to her credit she does need grommets and her hearing is currently quite low because of it). It's a miracle if you ever get her to walk instead of run so I think your friend needs a major reality check.

5 DD's here and they all go stir crazy without outdoor play - I dread bad weather as I can guarantee I have a houseful of fed up children who really need to bounce around outdoors.

Angel I found with mine that the beginner zumba videos on youtube satisfied her need to be active when it's too wet outside (like now!). She's just turned 6 and finds it great fun, she can't always do the moves but she loves it anyway, might help? Probably quite good for older children too, if they like that sort of thing.

With dogs and children, the more exercise they get, the fitter they become, the more exercise they need to tire them out.
Rain has never been an excuse for not walking my dogs or playing outside for DD.

I have two DS who couldn't be more different in personalities, and when people say things like that I say something like oh didn't realise my DS2 was a girl then? it's just silly really everyone is different regardless of gender. I was labeled a tomboy when I was a kid and still don't like dresses and stereotypical women's things, I still identify myself as a woman though.

Sounds like a load of nonsense to me. All kids need excercise, and go stir crazy if they're in too long. Our dad took sis and I out most Sundays, for about an hour while my mum cleaned. Wellies and raincoats. Then straight in bath when we got home. Not if weather was really bad though, we'd play cards or a game. She's not wrong to think going out for a bit wouldn't do her ds any harm, but she's wrong thinking it's because he's a boy.