To make nanny and DC travel economy?

[BooAvenue]

We are planning a trip to NY in the autumn and plan to take nanny, DD who will be 6 and DS who will be 16 months.

DH and I will be flying business, partially because I am a crap flyer despite flying frequently and partly because we have quite a lot of air miles that we want to make the most of.

The plan is to bring nanny on the 5 day trip so she can help out with the travelling and babysit for us on three of the nights. I've discussed it with her and she's very eager to come, and the plan is she will have 2 days and 2 evenings completely free to do as she pleases, plus TOIL of 6 days. We will of course pay for all hotels/flights/meals out and she's welcome to join in with us on her days off if she wishes. She also gets her own room whilst we have a 2 bed family room.

The difference between economy and club is about 2.5k per ticket, which whilst we are not poor is still a fair chunk of money.

So AIBU to fly business whilst she flies economy? And will DS need his own seat or will he need to go on one of our laps?

Agreed imperial

In fact there are startling similarities to this thread

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/what_would_you_do/2544617-Son-2-5yrs-Invited-To-Paris-with-Mother

recallstill very alien to me though!
peridot bang on.

I get where you're coming from Imperial but its still alive and well where these demands are the norm. Believe me I know

Actually, no, my nanny doesn't usually care for my dc while I work.

I am a sahm. And I have a nanny. Judge away. And yes, we take our nanny on holiday too.

I honestly don't get why other people having different lives, and different solutions to whatever logistical problems they may have, is such a problem for some posters.

She's a frequent flyer but planning this trip to NY in 9 months' time as though it's a big, special event

I'm a frequent flier but a family trip to NY would still be a big/special event for me.

It's a bit more in depth than me grabbing my toothbrush and clean knickers and jumping on a 2 hour flight to Munich and back in the same day.

What age can I bribe my kids in economy with iPads and a mountain of sweets and some bribes and travel with DH in business (ignores the fact that we can't afford business for anyone)

We went to Australia with our small children. I would have loved a nanny in terms of an extra pair of hands, sharing meal times etc. but I cant imagine not sharing their first flight with them - wonder as the plane took off, watching things get smaller out the window, following the flight plan etc.

Very very very different relationship with children in this world to the one I'm used to. (At times when traipsing through national trust properties I kind of like the idea of my children being presented to me all ready for bed after a formal dinner and a token story.... but I'd hate to live like that really!)

YANBU. It's hardly that long haul to NY anyway assuming you're flying from London, the nanny will be fine.

I am a sahm. And I have a nanny. Judge away. And yes, we take our nanny on holiday too.

pandas - I'm not being argumentative and am genuinely interested, but why do you need a nanny? What role does she play if you are a SAHM?

One of my friends doesn't work and is due her first baby in a month and I'm pretty sure she's going to get herself a nanny

I thought the days of children being treated second class and just being brought out to kiss mummy goodnight were over.

Using the excuse they will see you nervous or won't enjoy trips is crap, why bother having them in the first place if neither of you can be bothered to parent them.

If the young one is with you in business and the 6 yo with nanny in economy it would work. In business you have a bigger seat and toddler could fit on seat too. It is very hard to have a little one on your knee the whole flight and then nanny won't be able to help the 6 yo. I have travelled long haul on my own with 2 DCs, one on my lap, and I wouldn't wish it on anyone.

I don't think Rose is being that serious....too many grinning smileys, and 'disgusting!'. She hasn't responded to any of responses to her points. I think she is just having fun now.

Pandas, before I returned to work after maternity leave there was a 4 month period where I was a SAHM but had our full time, live in nanny already in place. One of the happiest times of my life. So much time with DS and lots of freedom too. I am jealous!!

Peridot you've said in a more measured way what I couldn't articulate. Members of my family always fly Business or First, but their children aren't stashed away in Economy. It's a family trip.

I can't possibly imagine wanting to sit apart from my own child, but then there's some pretty queer folks out there.

I also can't see how sitting in business class will make the OP less anxious. It's still the same plane, you're all going to hit the ground at the same rate if it crashes.

But if you insist on doing this, please buy your toddler a seat. Expecting your nanny to have a 16 month old on her lap for 7 hours is absolute crap. She won't get to go to the toilet, or have a meal. And as someone who was stuck sitting next to a 17 month old on her mother's lap for a 12 hour flight, it was an absolute nightmare for me. The kid didn't sit still, and certainly didn't remain within their seat. My hair got pulled, drink got spilled on me, a tantrum occurred when I wouldn't change my personal screen to a kid's program. The mother was up and down the whole time, which meant I had to get up to let them out (I was in the aisle seat), and then when I went to the toilet she put the kid in my seat and refused to move it because it had fallen asleep. I spent seven hours standing in the galley because there wasn't a spare seat anywhere else on the plane. All children should have to have their own seat, regardless of age.

I hope the OP has also considered that the flight (including security, customs, travel time, waiting for baggage) to be working hours, and as such, the nanny will be entitled to breaks, as well as a certain number of hours off after arrival. I hope she doesn't expect to arrive at the hotel and just leave the nanny to babysit so they can go to one of their special restaurants.

rosewithoutthorns
Most people work for a living and don't have your life. We all come in the same way and go out the same way. You are a terrible snob that has a "servant" mentality. Disgusting.

The nanny is obviously from another country and paid pittance.

And AFTER that last gem (& after yet another one then two more gems: Mostly foreign by the way and paid pittance. Disgusting! ...they get paid jack shite for a thing that they should be paid more than your PA for! ), you THEN ask the OP what country is from???!! Are you high?

Leaving aside the absurdity of your nuts assertions prior to asking the question WTAF does nationality of the nanny have to do with anything? Or don't you like forriners Rose ?

Just in case you ARE actually interested, nannies earn a frickin fortune & if they live in, have zero expenses. DC are all old enough now that I don't need a nanny but when smaller and with both of us working it was a necessity, not us being 'snobs'.

You are also seriously patronising those who choose nannying as their career path don't you think? I've never met a nanny that thinks of herself as a 'servant' or who would EVER work anywhere she/he felt they were being treated like a servant. My last nanny earned in excess of £35k pa, hardly a 'pittance'

Truly, on what POSS basis can you claim OP's nanny is both a foreigner and paid a pittance? You are laughable.

I also can't see how sitting in business class will make the OP less anxious. It's still the same plane, you're all going to hit the ground at the same rate if it crashes

Now there's a thought to calm anxiety But I do agree. A billionaire is just as mortal as a pauper, which is well worth remembering for all sorts of reasons.

why bother having them in the first place if neither of you can be bothered to parent them.

Well quite.

"then when I went to the toilet she put the kid in my seat and refused to move it because it had fallen asleep. I spent seven hours standing in the galley because there wasn't a spare seat anywhere else on the plane."

Whaaaaaat????????

Why on earth did you not tell the flight attendant to sort it out and get the child shifted???

I have 3 dc, all autistic.
My older two are at different schools, always have been and always will be. My eldest's school is 2 counties away, and I (or the nanny ) take her daily. She is eligible for transport but wouldn't cope with it.

My youngest (only 3) was spending his entire life in the car before we had a nanny - the morning school run takes just over 2 hours if done as a round trip. The afternoon run takes longer due to after school clubs for my middle child. We am were leaving the house at 2.30pm, and sometimes not back until 5.45om - that time being spent in the car, and waiting around at pick up etc. Hardly a decent life. And it became untenable as my eldest got bigger, and once I had dc3, as eldest need full time 1:1. It was not possible to be waiting around middle child's school with the other 2 dc, but also not logistically possible to go home.

Youngest dc will start school in September. At another school. So 3 at 3 different schools, none of them able to complete the journey by themselves. I can't be in two places at the same time (youngest and eldest will finish at the same time, 20 miles apart; no after school care at eldest's school) let alone 3!

Luckily, we can afford a nanny. I managed with my eldest 2 for many years, but it Was very stressful due to severity of needs. Life is much simpler now, though no less busy. I am hardly a lady of leisure , we just split the multiple drop offs/pick ups between us, and split looking after ds too.

It also men's that after school, when dc2 is trying to get homework done, she has some peace and space to do it as there is an extra person to supervise/help out with her siblings.

In the school holidays, it isn't possible to take all 3 dc out, even to the park, alone due to differing ness and ages. And so again, an extra pair of hands means that we are not all housebound and suffering from cabin fever!

In one of the Home Alone films the parents do this, don't they? Except they don't have a nanny so they forget how many children they have

And OP - you've obviously had clear convs with your nanny and recompensing her really well given will be both paid for working as well as then time off in lieu (so essentially double bubble and plenty of free time for herself in NYC too) so I'd ignore the mosre extreme of the snipers here. Jealously, end of.

Only thing I would say is to echo all those who say you def need that 3rd seat and you and DH each take over for one hour so nanny on for 2 hours with hours break, then on for another 2 hours followed by another hours break, then just one hour before lands. Will work fine, have a great trip

LMAO

Guilty as charged

We are currently on holiday and took our nanny but we all went business class.

Bit different as we have a 23m old and a 3.5 year old and it was 11 hour flight. So didn't feel that we could leave them with just her for 11 hours. We therefore had to all be in the same cabin, and seeing as we wouldn't fly economy that cabin had to be business. We bought the 23m old a seat. I would DEFINITELY buy a 16m old a seat.

Having them on your knee that long (and in economy!!) wouldn't be any fun at all. I think you could have nanny and 6yr old in economy and baby on YOUR knee shared with husband in business. But get the two middle seats if it's BA as there is loads of floor space for him to play.

Have one of the kids in business class with you. It could be the six year old. But if it is, make sure the tot has her own seat in economy.

You can't leave the nanny to look after both in her own - it won't be fair. For a start, kids usually fall asleep towards the end of a flight. How is she supposed to carry her hand luggage, the kids' and the kids herself?