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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To want to live in a fur free home?

105 replies

Yulia989 · 13/01/2016 14:31

Background: Three years ago me and my partner got together. He has a dog. THere was no question of the dog leaving despite my allergy, but I didn't mind as I could deal with it with antihistamine, as long as the dog was kept downstairs and off the furniture. A year ago we had our son and moved to a different house. Recently the amount of fur shed by the dog is ridiculous. We've got a dyson pet hoover, but even hoovering every day, within hours the floor is covered in fur again. The fur gets everywhere - on the furniture, the kitchen counters, the beds - just from being moved around. With our son crawling this is causing me real upset, as every time I pick him up he's covered in fur, and I'm ashamed to say that sometimes it makes me not want to pick him up because of my allergies and the hygiene issue. I'm afraid to bring it up with my partner because last time it turned into a big row over the dog leaving my car covered in fur and me "acting like the dog is a burden". I just want to live in a clean, fur-free home, and have my son play on the floor and come up without fur all over him. AIBU?

OP posts:
araiba · 13/01/2016 14:52

you moved in to a home with a dog so yabu to complain about a dog being in your house

nextusername · 13/01/2016 14:57

Can your partner brush the dog regularly so it doesn't shed as much hair indoors?

wowis · 13/01/2016 15:00

this is really difficult op, why is the dog suddenly shedding so much more? why was it manageable in the last house but not here?
As an animal lover I don't think I would give my pet up if you had initially agreed to cohabit knowing the pet was part of the deal.. do sympathise though.

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 13/01/2016 15:00

Yabu, the dog was there first.

Dog hair is a bit of an issue here at the moment. It's so warm that mine are shedding it by the bucketload. We need some cold weather.

TheoriginalLEM · 13/01/2016 15:01

is there a reason for the additional loss of hair?

do ask your dp to brush daily too. that will help a great deal.

must be difficult

Original poster
Yulia989 · 13/01/2016 15:05

I don't really know why it's started shedding more! It just seems that in the last few months there is so much more of it. I don't want to ask him to give the dog up at all, but I do want to find a solution so I don't have to live like this. I don't want this thread to turn into "dog-owners vs non dog-owners" either, just a reasonable discussion and perhaps any tips.

OP posts:
MaxPepsi · 13/01/2016 15:08

What kind of dog is it?

I have a yellow lab. The amount of extra hair he has at the moment is bloody ridiculous. With it being so mild he just doesn't need it and it's driving him crazy!

I too hate dog hair and I love my animal!

I bought a new brush for him recently, quite an expensive one considering it's just a dog brush, in an attempt to alleviate the problem. It's a miracle worker.

I'll try and find a link but I got it from TK maxx so not sure what brand it is.

theycallmemellojello · 13/01/2016 15:10

YANBU at all - yes you accepted the dog when you moved in but that's hardly the point - you've now had a baby together and all couples have to make lifestyle changes when they have a child. If it's affecting your relationship with the baby and your health then I think either the dog has to go, or your DP has to get a lot better about cleaning up after it. If you put it in those terms - ie in terms of the health of his child and the mother of child and her ability to care for the baby - surely he won't put the pet first? If he does - I think that's a bigger problem.

Original poster
Yulia989 · 13/01/2016 15:11

Thanks Max, it's a jack russell - corgi cross.

OP posts:
specialsubject · 13/01/2016 15:12

I'm afraid to bring it up with my partner because last time it turned into a big row over the dog leaving my car covered in fur and me "acting like the dog is a burden"

uh-oh....

This problem could be easily solved if he brushed the dog.

pets ARE a burden. Who is bearing it?

theycallmemellojello · 13/01/2016 15:13

To be clear, it sounds like your DP's attitude is problematic: "acting like the dog is a burden" - you are allergic to it and it covers your house and car in hairs and affects your ability to care for your child - of course the dog is a burden! It's a huge burden for you. He needs to recognise that, and take steps to lessen that burden.

Original poster
Yulia989 · 13/01/2016 15:16

To be honest the "burden" row came before the baby was born and we sorted it out. We both work and share the household chores, but I don't do anything involved with cleaning the dog. I honestly don't think he has the time to brush the dog every day - how long does it take? This is a small dog.

OP posts:
MaxPepsi · 13/01/2016 15:20

I'm going to look tonight as I have no idea where to start!

I know it has tiny hooked pins tho, so it gets to the undercoat not just the top coat. My dog looked about a stone lighter after I'd used it the first time!

In the meantime, ask your DP to wipe the dog down with a damp disinfected cloth. That can get rid of loads of hair sometimes. He should be doing it anyway as a matter of course. It's not the dogs fault he's hairy!

Most dog lovers don't like dog hair either, we are just more accepting of it so don't let him think you are being out of order!

BarbaraofSeville · 13/01/2016 15:21

A few minutes brushing each day will make a huge difference so there is no 'doesn't have time' argument. He must spend a lot more than that amount of time walking the dog, so it's just a tiny bit extra.

But it does sound like you might be getting into a bit of state over it - surely if you are vacuuming daily, there can't be that much hair - the dog would be bald by now.

HermioneJeanGranger · 13/01/2016 15:23

Get your DP to brush his dog! But other than that, YABU. The dog was there first!

Twitterqueen · 13/01/2016 15:25

YABU. To a dog-owner it's pretty much like saying you want them to get rid of their child.

littlewoollypervert · 13/01/2016 15:26

Get him to incorporate brushing the dog into the dog walk - and to do it outside the house? A dog that small - it should take about 2 mins.

Twitterqueen · 13/01/2016 15:28

And I do suspect you are exaggerating more than just a little - your child is covered in fur... .really? Sounds like you've got Chewbacca, not a small dog Biscuit

Original poster
Yulia989 · 13/01/2016 15:29

The dog wasn't there first, the dog was in a different house. This is our house so we were all there at the same time.

And Barbara, I'm not getting into a state, and I also can't believe that the dog isn't bald by now! I swear she must be buying the stuff in and spreading it around.

OP posts:
HermioneJeanGranger · 13/01/2016 15:31

The dog wasn't there first, the dog was in a different house. This is our house so we were all there at the same time.

No, the dog was there first - your DP owned him before he even met you. You knew he had a dog when you first moved in with him, so you can't complain about it now.

Original poster
Yulia989 · 13/01/2016 15:36

I can't complain if the situation changes? haha.

I think I'm entitled to have an opinion on something that is detrimental to my quality of living, and try and find a solution to the issue.

Are you the real Hermione Granger? You seem about the right age with your "my way or the highway" attitude.

OP posts:
KatharinaRosalie · 13/01/2016 15:36

I unfortunately have to say that YABU to expect a fur free house when you have a dog. There will be fur.

You can expect a little less fur covered house though - get this www.amazon.co.uk/FURminator-DeShedding-Tool-Dogs-Medium/dp/B00Q2SUEGE/ref=sr_1_7?ie=UTF8&qid=1452699214&sr=8-7&keywords=furminator

Get your DP to give the dog a good wash and brush - they always shed loads after being washed - and then regular brushings as often as he can manage. Outside, of course. Even just a few minutes will make a difference with such a small dog.

goodnightdarthvader1 · 13/01/2016 15:38

Partner needs to brush / de-shed the dog daily. We do this when our cat starts shedding in the summer and it helps loads.

HermioneJeanGranger · 13/01/2016 15:41

Lol, really? Insults now? Hmm

I get the fur is irritating, but you knew he had a dog. Dogs shed. Nothing can really change that except regular brushing and making sure you vacuum. While the dog is alive, you won't be able to live in a fur-free environment.

goldierocks · 13/01/2016 15:42

Hello OP....friends of mine had a similar issue.

They invested in a Dyson Groom Tool (about £30 from Amazon) and they swear by it. It's an attachment that clips onto the end the hose - you vacuum your pet.

If your dog won't tolerate the noise, I'd recommend a Furminator traditional comb. They come in all sizes (I have the small one for my cats). They both hated normal pet brushes but love this comb - they come running when I get it out. It combs the undercoat and removes LOADS of loose hair each time.

I think the unusually mild winter means that pets are shedding their winter coats much earlier than normal. It should slow down/stop if we get a sharp cold spell.