To be fuming with ds teacher and speak to the new headteacher

[PiperIsTerrysChoclateOrange]

Ds is asd also SN and has a statement. In general homework is a nightmare and despite him being in year 5 ( age 9-10) I can not understand his writing neither can the teacher.

This week after a lot of encouragement and tears and tantrum he learnt his spelling but come to the test he had 1 right. I have already told the teacher of my plan which involves financial gain if he got 1/2 right. In which her response is what went on Adam, how come it went pear shaped.

Now that left ds confused as with asd generally they don't get sayings and 2 why question a child like that.

The homework set this weekend in which he was made to write I can not understand in which the teacher replied that she could not either.

Should I complain as I feel like the teacher has no clue ( sorry to the teachers on MN I know 1 bad apple don't spoil an apple field)

I think that the real issue isn't with your ds' teacher, so it's unfair to be fuming with her, as it would appear that in actual fact you are concerned/angry that despite having a full statement he is still struggling at school, not producing legible work and his teachers have apparently not had even any basic ASD training - although that may not be the case, I slip up occasionally myself, even as a parent of a child with ASD. None of that is actually the teacher's fault.

Complaining about the teacher using a phrase your ds is unlikely to understand isn't going to address the wider issues.

My eldest ds also has ASD and a statement and we made sure the wording on his statement was such that all staff working with him had to have a certain level of ASD training. This was achieved through an INSET session at his primary school and actually benefitted multiple pupils, not just ds. He is now at a secondary where there is a rolling programme of ASD training to make sure all new staff are included (this was already in place before we chose to name the school in his statement).

At this stage his handwriting issues do need properly addressing, if his writing isn't legible, regardless of his ability he won't be able to achieve his potential. We were advised by his Ed Psych, ASD Outreach Teacher and a physiotherapist from Cerebra that specialises in handwriting issues, that at this age you're fighting an uphill battle and while they need to maintain a degree of handwriting and this should be practised daily, it's probably more important to teach them to touch-type and arrange provision of a laptop. Ds also has his handwriting recorded by either the class TA or teacher, as if it's left to him he wouldn't have a clue what to do and I wouldn't be able to help him because I wouldn't be able to read it. You can either deal with this at his annual review or if you feel it's massively undermining all his schoolwork, call an emergency annual review to get it addressed more quickly.

Re common sayings etc, we used several books like this and this to teach ds the most common phrases and now at almost 14 years old he rarely comes across one he doesn't know, although, as I said earlier I do slip up sometimes and if that happens we use it as a learning experience for him (and me).

The teacher is obviously not trained in asd or would be very aware that such idioms are confusing and stressful to the child.

I have 30 children in my class. 3 of them have asd (both ends of the spectrum, all with different strengths and weaknesses), 2 have global delay, 4 have dyslexia, one has dyscalculia, 4 are under CAMHS, several others have a whole range of issues. I'm supposedly 'trained' to deal with asd. I still use idioms. How else are they supposed to ever get their heads around them? If needed, I'll explain or rephrase. (Hard to believe, but I even use big numbers in Maths,...although they might scare my child with dyscalculia. There are 29 other kids in the class, who need to get to a year 6 standard!)
Apart from expanding my class' vocabulary,...I'm also human and sometimes will absent-mindedly say something without having analysed it from fifty angles before it crosses my lips.

Complete over reaction. Just because he has ASD it does not automatically mean that he doesn't know different sayings. Just speak to the teacher and explain that he does not understand them.

If his writing is bad ask if he can use a laptop, alphasmart or have s scribe.

Fgs a teacher has 29 other children to see to, let alone switching on and off at a seconds notice about phrases she shouldn't be saying. Honestly the crap teachers have to put up , who would want to be one.

Apologies, my post should have said my ds has his homework recorded by the teacher or Ta, not his handwriting.

I can see the teacher got it a bit wrong, but it really doesn't justify "fuming". I would suggest you calm down, then ask to see her to talk about how you can deal with the homework issue. Whilst doing so you could just mention in passing that it's not a great idea to use figurative language around DS, and explain why.

Could he be allowed to type his homework? not sure if this would help or not xx

As the parent of a late teens child with ASD I actually think using idiomatic phrases is a good thing as long as they are explained. Children will come across them in everyday life and need a memory bank of them. My DC can recognise and apply most common ones now.

I'd just remind the teacher to explain them and remind your DS to ask if he does not understand.

Piper sorry to hear this it sounds very stressful.

My dd is dyslexic and really struggles at school. Her handwriting was hard to read for a long time but in Year 5 we saw a real improvement, so hang on in there.

I think a chat to the teacher about idioms would be good and a general review of how he is doing re writing/spelling etc.

Totally agree with poster/s suggesting learning to touch type is a good idea.

Think learning the idioms would be helpful, but of course writing any down for himself will require him to be able to write legibly. Could you teach him to cut and paste from a list and form his on list on the computer of ones that really might be useful.

It's all gone pear-shaped is not one of the most common! It doesn't even appear on this list of food-based idioms!

examples.yourdictionary.com/examples-of-food-idioms.html

All the best.

The homework needs sorting.

The idiom complaining is just silly.

Typo ...form his own list on the computer....

(That list is American I think so that may explain why pear-shaped is not on it, but hungry bear and pop-corn are!)

If the head disciplines her, perhaps that will be, "The cherry on the cake?"
Your ds is struggling, but don't vent your frustration on the teacher.

DS has informed me a child was put in detention today for laughing at him 'misunderstanding' a word.
He didn't misunderstand the word, he took it literally or rather out of context. English lesson and asked what a sidekick was. Of course he said kicking to the side as couldn't put word in context of a literacy meaning - eg robin to batman!

he does need to understand and learn - the issue is not the misunderstanding but people's reactions to it IMO.

My complaint is that a teacher should know how to address a child with asd, after all every one who knows about autism knows that general sayings confuses them.

Everyone who knows about autism knows that when you've met one person with autism you've met one person with autism. I personally have never been confused by idioms. They're currently a special interest of mine.

He is going to live in a world where idioms are used all the time in all sorts of situations. It will help him to understand them.

YABU

Yes, perhaps the teacher shouldn't be using idioms routinely but she is only human and it was probably just a mistake. No-one is perfect! Unless this is something she does very frequently I think that fact that you are "fuming" at this mistake seems a bit OTT. At least she sounds interested and was trying to get him to think about what wasn't working. If you must speak to someone about it (and I think it would be better left) then I would speak to the teacher about your concerns before going to the head-master. This teacher is going to be teaching your son for the rest of the school year- wouldn't it be better to try to be constructive and save "fuming' and "contacting the head" for significant problems? It will probably make life easier for you all.

I agree issue with homework needs sorting. Again, I think you should speak to the teacher and agree a more suitable method of communicating his homework to you (e.g. she checks it before it goes home, she sends home written instruction or on a laptop). I would only go to the head if the teacher is unhelpful in this regard.

I too believe that it is useful to expose children to idioms, but I don't think 'pear-shaped' about your ds's spelling test is particularly nice. Leaving aside asd and training for teachers, she is talking to a young person with a learning difficulty that, ahem, makes learning very difficult for him. Pear-shaped may be friendly enough to some of the others in the class but is not best language for all, including nt sensitive pupils that have really tried.
She may not fully understand his needs but I think when talking to him about a test it would be far more appropriate to say something along the lines of, 'Well done for getting the first one right. Spelling can be very difficult'. 'Do you know why the second one was harder?' 'We'll practise spelling that word some more'. She's in the classroom, not in the playground with her pals.
Also, think it's ridiculous that at this time of the year (assuming taught since September) that she isn't more aware of the handwriting issue and how this will affect homework. He has a statement so the ta should be checking.
I would try not to fume, it won't help, but keep a note of these examples and any others so if it gets worse you have evidence that she is not interested. In addition, carry on telling her in a friendly way each time, but try not to be too petty and do it with a smile.
If the homework situation improves then good, if not by half term, ask to speak to head of ks2 or senco.

Youarentkiddingme you can buy it here www.thedyslexiashop.co.uk/pull-your-socks-up.html

God, I feel for teachers these days. Every parent seems to be "fuming" over something ridiculous.

YANBU to point out that many children with ASD are completely bemused by simile, metaphor, and a wide variety of idiom, due to the tendency to take language completely literally. I would have expected someone teaching a child with ASD to know this.

I don't understand why you and/or the teacher is so focused on spelling if your ds finds it as difficult as you describe. Skip the spelling and teach him how to use Spellcheck and use the energy to work on something he can be successful at and which will be more useful in the modern world of ubiquitous computers. And why isn't he typing if he can't write legibly?

I understand that the ASD complicates things, but it might be better to try and work with the skills your ds has rather than trying to force antiquated skills that he can't master on him.

I have a ds with dysgraphia...he was typing all his assignments by age 6 and now at 15 is successful in his classes because he wasn't held back struggling with trying to learn penmanship. Similarly, my dd has some sort of spelling disorder...it's been assessed and identified, but not named. She misspells 3 letter words, but always read at a very advanced level, so we gave up trying to get her to learn to spell. Now (at age 13) she still spells terribly, but is very well trained to not turn in any assignment or put anything into the public domain without running spell check and getting someone who can spell to double check her work.

Christ on a bike.

Stop 'fuming' about something so minor, and go and have a chat with the teacher.

Love, the teacher has done nothing wrong.

Your use of idiom is highly irregular, and it's ok for your apples, but not for the teacher to use pears.

It is your job as the parent of a child with ASD to challenge the ASD wherever possible, to give the hold the tools to understand and navigate the confusing world around them.

Every unusual turn of phrase you and your dc hears is an opportunity to celebrate the strange and rich make up of the language. You can ask him to ask you whenever he comes across another expression or idiom.

YAbu to financially reward him based on getting half right. That's too high a bar to hit.

My ds doesn't have ASD, but he doesn't perform well in tests. The more he drills for spellings, the lower the score. The more pressure on him, the worse he does.

If money motivates your son (as it does mine) then reward for every correct answer so he gets at least something.

If he doesn't get a single one right, perhaps rerun the test at home and pay him half per correct answer.

In every event for the home test you have to insist on legibility, takes his time and gets it right and legible.

Sorry, give him the tools

iPhone autocorrect