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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think that this is completely weird?

200 replies

whyistherumgone · 29/12/2015 23:14

OK, before I start I know this is going to sound like I'm trolling but I absolutely promise this is for real.
My cousin and I have been whatsapping tonight - she's just bought a house with her DP having never lived together before and we often end up having chats about those annoying habits you discover when you move in together.
Tonight she mentioned that one thing has happened and she can't get her head around it and doesn't know how to tackle it with DP, whether to bring it up or just leave it so wanted my advice. I'm afraid I'm just slightly agog and can offer no explanation but have her full permission to post here to see if anyone else has any gems to offer...

DP is out and she was tidying up the bedroom. She opened his top drawer to put some socks away and found a ziplock bag....full of what can only be (her words) neatly trimmed pubic hair. Just resting on top of the socks. The dustpan and brush was sitting on top of his chest of drawers. She's a bit freaked out by the whole thing - why didn't he just flush it or throw it away?it's mainly the effort of having swept it into the bag that's bothering her, I mean why keep it?? She feels like she should bring it up but isn't sure how... I think she should leave the bag on top of the drawers so it's visible and see what he does...

Any ideas? I have to admit I'm been torn between laughing like a complete loon and complete bafflement. We've now had a few glasses of wine between us and the whatsapps are becoming completely hysterical. Do join us with any wisdom you can offer.

OP posts:
IJustLostTheGame · 30/12/2015 09:35

Does your friend have a neatly coiffed lady garden?

He's secretly making her a merkin as he craves a big old bush.

He's very planateer and is saving it for the compost bin.

Or he's a druid. Some occult save their hairs but I can't remember which.

CalleighDoodle · 30/12/2015 09:37

Well that just got weirder. What an odd reaction to a simple question of, 'why are you hiding a bag of pubes?'

Vedamakesthebesttoast · 30/12/2015 09:40

Roaring at the image of him asleep on the sofa 'clutching his bag of pubes'

She's got a keeper there Xmas Shock

Original poster
whyistherumgone · 30/12/2015 09:43

He is such a nice, normal, well-adjusted guy (well so we thought), very open and easy going, which just makes it odder.

Ijust all amazing suggestions. One of them on here has got to be right, surely? I'm secretly hoping for one of the more outlandish ones to be true.

OP posts:
Aposey · 30/12/2015 09:47

Is he saving it to make a hair rat? If he has long hair and she suddenly finds his man buns are much more eh luxurious than usual, maybe hes stuffed it all in a hair net as padding?

SausageSmuggler · 30/12/2015 09:55

Maybe he wants to stuff a pillow? That would probably raise more questions though tbh.

pictish · 30/12/2015 10:18

Oh my God! What is happening here? Shock Grin

No I feel for your cousin though. This is super weird. Hope he's got something to offer up by way of explanation this morning. I wonder if he's spent the night concocting a story in which it's no big deal to have a bag of your own pubes.
Perhaps we'll never know.

LindyHemming · 30/12/2015 10:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Grrarg · 30/12/2015 10:25

Very odd! Not place marking at all honestly :-)

AliceScarlett · 30/12/2015 10:25

I'm going to vote ocd. Hate to pathogise, but I am.

Original poster
whyistherumgone · 30/12/2015 10:30

So.
He said he was grooming himself one night when she was in the bath having a soak, as he was planning on DTD when she got out and wanted to be all neat and tidy, and as he couldn't flush he popped it into a ziplock bag instead, put it in his drawer and forgot about it.

Thing is, she doesn't believe him - there are many holes in this - he had to go past several bins to fetch the ziplock bag to begin with, and the dust pan and brush and they have a downstairs loo so why not do it in there?
When she brought up the previous incident of pubes on a line on the toilet seat he got quite shirty and said he would not discuss this with her any more, that she was being hysterical and ridiculous and is now giving her the silent treatment. Bit of an overreaction don't you think?
Perhaps pictish is right and we'll never know...

OP posts:
Original poster
whyistherumgone · 30/12/2015 10:32

Maybe I'm just too determined to find an odd reason. There were so many greta suggestions on here, I'm not quite ready to let them go.

OP posts:
BrienneofQarth · 30/12/2015 10:32

Years ago, a friend of my dbro grew a fairly impressive beard. He eventually shaved it off, kept the clippings and sold them on eBay. All proceeds to charity.

place marking, me??

pictish · 30/12/2015 10:34

Oh God he is totally telling the truth. He is. My last tenner bets on it.
Poor sod. Lololol... Grin

PurpleHairAndPearls · 30/12/2015 10:35

You see, this is exactly why you should never buy a house with someone you haven't lived with previously. I'm considering printing this out and keeping it as a cautionary tale for my DCs.

I'm liking the pube merkin theory. I once bought DH a book about knitting little toys out of cat hair (we have a long haired cat who sheds copious amounts of hair and it drives DH demented). I wonder if there are similar books out there for little toys made out of pubes. I'm not googling this.

msrisotto · 30/12/2015 10:36

Eugh. God it's so disgusting though.

Original poster
whyistherumgone · 30/12/2015 10:41

purple I love the idea of you filing this away and starting a 'warning' manual for your DC.

I feel slightly let down by the whole thing, which is very selfish of me as poor cousin is stressed that he's not speaking to her now.
Bit mean of him really, but he's probably hungover and didn't really want to have a long convo about his pubic grooming habits first thing.

Also purple, I did google, but it came up with an article about a woman knitting with wool from her lady parts. I didn't click on the video. Shock

OP posts:
DoreenLethal · 30/12/2015 10:43

If it was innocent, then he would still be talking to her!

OTheHugeManatee · 30/12/2015 10:43

It's for Build A Bear. It must be. Why else would he take the pube bag with him to cuddle when sleeping on the sofa?

AliceScarlett · 30/12/2015 10:49

Click the link! Its rough.

pictish · 30/12/2015 10:51

Hmm no - I'm keeping my tenner. I agree if it was innocent he'd be embarrassed but not angry.

pictish · 30/12/2015 10:52

Oh who knows. I can't decide.
We will never know.

PerspicaciaTick · 30/12/2015 10:57

I think that there are probably other bags stashed elsewhere in the house. I doubt he has suddenly started hoarding clippings and if it is an ongoing situation he must have amassed quite a collection.

Gliblet · 30/12/2015 11:00

This thread has made me giggle - to be fair to him though, if you're OCD and embarrassed about it it's not going to make you feel any more supported and ready to discuss it if someone follows you round the house badgering you for an explanation...

SaucyJack · 30/12/2015 11:00

Is his nan still alive?

Am now wondering if he snuck himself a little trophy from the wake.

Would explain the sentimental value.

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