To have told my father my DC get bored at his house ?

[CorsaKan]

I have two young DC - both under 5.

I rarely see my father as he never comes to visit (we live an hour away) . All visiting is done by me .

My father has asked me to visit him to exchange Christmas gifts . He will not come to me .

It's a two hour round trip and my father has no interest in my children .

There are no toys there. He will say hello to them but not interact with them .

He will stress about noisy toys , lids off pens , hand prints on glass etc so it's stressful to me .

I'll be lucky if the toddler lasts 30 minutes before she's whining to come home .

I asked my father to come with me to the soft play near his house but he said no.

I was trying to explain to my father that I am reluctant to drive for a long time for a short visit - I'd rather visit when my nephew will be at home (lives next door to my father) as there will be toys at his house as well as other children to play with .

My father wasn't getting why the visit will be short and I said that the DC will get bored being in the house and will start to play up / whinge etc.

Now I feel mean . WIBU?

The only person being mean is your dad. If he wants to see you, he can come and visit. He's not welcoming to your children so why would you take them to see him?

The only alternative I can see is meeting him halfway at a park. Otherwise, I'd say no.

go without the kids?

I can't leave the kids at home as my DH works away .

I'm doubtful he will meet me half way .

I'm more bothered that I told him my kids would be bored at his house

Take toys/books/DVDs with you? What does he expect them to do on your visit - sit quietly in a corner and twiddle their thumbs?

Really no need to feel mean - just explain that young children get bored with nothing to do, so you will be bringing something to keep them entertained. A couple of favourite DVDs playing not very loudly on the TV might be your saviour, then distract him from the "stress" with endless cups of tea.