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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To dislike seeing young children with pierced ears.

381 replies

Singsongsungagain · 21/12/2015 19:10

Inspired by a picture on FB today of a friend's young child (6 years old) sobbing her eyes out whilst getting her ears pierced.
Why the hell would any decent parent hold their child steady to allow their ears to be pierced? What is it all about??

OP posts:
noeffingidea · 21/12/2015 22:33

notimefortossers I see loads of adult women walking around without earrings, whether they've had them pierced in the past or not. My mum never had hers done. My daughter won't ever have hers done either. I might as well not have done seeing as I haven't worn earrings in over 20 years.

Burgatroyd · 21/12/2015 22:35

I had mine done as a baby as it was the cultural norm.

Never thought twice about it and never knew it was thought of as 'chavvy'.

Oldest dd does not want it done so am glad I didn't pierce her ears but if she asks will have no problem with it.

honeylulu · 21/12/2015 22:56

I'm an adult woman without pierced ears. My Dad was strict and said it wasn't allowed until age 18. By . By then (early 90s) it was far more unusual/rebellious NOT to have them done. I love my unblemished earlobes. My sister has never had hers done either.
I think it's ok as long as the child has requested it. Unforgivable to make your baby cry for nothing. It also annoys me that baby piercings for cultural reasons are seen as more "worthy" than those I've heard deemed as PWT (but it does happen).
All children are innocent and start with a blank slate. Why not leave them be?

MaryPoppinsPenguins · 21/12/2015 23:04

I hate it... I think it looks awful, is barbaric and it's pretty much the only thing I'm snobby about. I could actually look at a mother who has had her DD's ears pierced and feel 'I'm a better person than you.'

That's awful I know, but that's how bad I think it is. Blush

Runwayqueen · 21/12/2015 23:12

My dd (5) has hers pierced. Her choice. I said she can have them done when she accepts it's going to hurt. I told her all the gory details thinking it would deter her. She asked for them, next day I took her, much to my shock she got them pierced with no fuss at all. She wears a simple gold stud.

I didn't like them at first but she is happy and has kept up with the cleaning/turning routine.

Crazybaglady · 21/12/2015 23:13

Im not a fan. My cousin recently had her 3 month old ears pierced and was going on about how upset SHE was and how she couldn't watch, and how she wanted no part in it (she wanted her kids ear pierced, but not to see it be done) one friend was even commenting about how 'you gotta go through pain for beauty' Hmm

Alisvolatpropiis · 21/12/2015 23:36

Three months crazy?! My daughter is 6 months, I can't imagine doing that to her now never mind 3 months ago.

Your cousin sounds fucking nuts.

counthedays · 21/12/2015 23:47

My DD had hers pierced when she was 7. She has looked after them perfectly and they have never got infected. I'm not keen on them on tiny children but after about 5 or 6 I think they look rather cute

Etak15 · 21/12/2015 23:49

Salem - because 4 lots of gold earrings could get a bit pricey! Wink

BooAvenue · 21/12/2015 23:53

I think they look truly foul on children. My own DD won't be allowed until at least secondary age when I feel she'll be able to make an informed decision.

Original poster
Singsongsungagain · 22/12/2015 00:14

On a 3 month old I'd struggle to not see that as abuse. I'd question the professionallsm of the organisation that did it. We don't own our children. What right does any parent have to put holes in the ears of another human without their explicit consent?

OP posts:
justalittlelemondrizzle · 22/12/2015 00:35

My DD's had theirs done earlier this year, they were 6 and 7 at the time. No tears, they were grinning the whole time and were very proud afterwards. I always said 6 was the youngest age I'd let them have them done as that's when I had mine pierced. I don't agree with babies having them done, I think as long as they are informed and it's their choice + being able to sit there independently while having it done then what's the problem?

Unreasonablebetty · 22/12/2015 01:07

I don't like to see it on young ones. And I had always said, nope no way will my DD have her ears pierced until she's 12. 12 is the age that I was when I had my ears pierced for the second time, before this I had my nose snd upper ear pierced as well as my ears the first time.

I despise at my mum just allowed me to have these piercings as a small child, and absolutely no care was given, I just wouldn't want to do the same to my child.

She had however been asking to have her ears pierced from the age of 5, and I caved in at the age of 7 and 6 months, but this was purely a want of hers.

I wish we hadn't of let her have them done so early, but she is still very happy with them in.

derenstar · 22/12/2015 01:21

Oh do get over yourselves. Yes, of course entire cultures, ethnicities and other non-White middle class people must be 'chavs' or common for piercing thier childrens ears. Wow, just, WOW! Who the fuck died and made your view point any more valid than theirs. Grow up, get a clue.

RedSoloCup · 22/12/2015 01:27

Okay so my DD were 7,8 and then 3.

The 7 and 8 yo wanted it done so I got it done in July so they had the school holidays for it to heal, then it didn't and commenced earring battles all year as they wanted them in but the holes kept closing up.

So the next July I went to (omg wait for it) Claires!!! Evil I know!!! And had my 3yo DD ears pierced, I must be evil!!

She didn't cry or even flinch and her holes had a whole year to heal before she started school.

WanderingNotLost · 22/12/2015 02:34

I was 6 (I think) when my ears were pierced. To me now, that was old enough to go into it willingly (no way on earth my Mum would have forced me in any way if I'd been reluctant) and young enough to forget it hurting. Apparently my response was 'ouch' followed by proudly showing my studs off to all and sundry. I think if the child isn't crying with fear that's probably about the right age to be honest.

Nataleejah · 22/12/2015 06:42

Got mine done at 13. It was already quite late, as my friends had theirs at 10-11. My DM was late 40's then. Never wanted earrings, but when she saw mine, she went to get hers done a week after.
DS1 got an earring at 8. He wanted to look like Lewis Hamilton Grin

Fratelli · 22/12/2015 07:00

Ugh no I hate it. Why on earth would you pierce a baby's ears? It's just cruel imo. Personally I would allow them to make the choice when they're older. I think 16 is probably a good age.

Catsize · 22/12/2015 07:15

I have said it before on similar threads, but I cannot understand why it does not constitute assault. None of the defences apply to this. I hate it. Yanbu.

Vanderwaals · 22/12/2015 08:41

Yam I
I saw a baby with hooped earrings (1cm big) I was ShockShockAngry

Vanderwaals · 22/12/2015 08:42

Yanbu*

AngieBolen · 22/12/2015 09:04

I think it was Autumn up thread who said they'd like to see ear pitching have an she limit like other piercings.

The thing us other piercings don't have an age limit (apart from genital and I think nipple) It's down to individual pierces, and whims most won't give under 16s lip/tongue/belly piercings it not illegal, even without parental consent. Not where I am anyway.

AngieBolen · 22/12/2015 09:09

Imo ear piercings on children (or any piercings) are a matter of taste. Yes, it's also cultural, but that can be said about many things which aren't necessarily "right". Personally I've backed away from quite a few aspects of my own culture because I can see they weren't in the best interests of my child.

I know several people who would be disapproving if I had my DDs ears pierced, but think I should have them pinned back. When DD wants her ears pinned back and understands the procedure she'll have it done. Because, like piercings it's cosmetic.

TaliZorah · 22/12/2015 09:27

Yeah I never had to give an age or consent for my piercings thinking about it. Literally walked in, said "I'd like x pierced" and got it done.

It's tattoos that have an age limit

noeffingidea · 22/12/2015 09:53

talizorah I think different local authorities can have different licensing rules.