Are school out of order or am IBU?

[ontheedgeofnewdawn]

School are having a non uniform day tomorrow to raise funds for children in the borough in poverty to have Christmas gifts. Great cause.

However the year head has said today than any child who comes in their own clothes but doesn't bring a donation will spend the day in isolation.

So if you are too poor to afford the donation you have to come in uniform so everybody knows your too poor, give money you cannot afford so your kids aren't embarrassed (some people have multiple children in school) or spend the day in isolation because you are too poor to pay the donation to another child in poverty?

I can pay the donation personally but I am feeling rather angry about it.

It was said in the year assembly btw.

It's completely inappropriate, I would challenge it.

To clarify- dos the school send a communication home stating that? Or has your DC got a knack for exaggerating?

They can't enforce it so I doubt that it's true.

That's shocking and unacceptable - I'd complain to the head and tell the local paper!

So they are raising money for children who live in poverty and at the very same time are punishing those same children because they cant afford the donation?

Thats appalling. I wouldnt bother with the school, go straight to the local paper.

School is being totally unreasonable and discriminatory. And also ought to remember just how many demands there are on families' finances at this time of year.

In the last couple of weeks, various organisations we belong to have asked for 2 x donations of gifts for churches to distribute to families in need (2 different churches), 2 x secret santa presents, tombola prizes for a school fair, food for two school parties and items to pack hampers for a local homelessness charity. When you add it up, it's a lot of money and I know there are families at the same schools and churches who will struggle with it all and probably feel rubbish about not being able to contribute.

Some children are embarressed by their own clothes - not latest trend - easier to wear uniform - so not jusr about the money in some cases.
Appalling.

I'm fairly certain that isn't allowed, I would call the local authority to check, I think it's appalling that schools act like this, it's such an unkind attitude and seems to be becoming more common (not just on non uniform days) I'm astounded that school expect pupils to be kind, caring and empathetic yet are 'teaching' then like this?

YANBU. Surely that negates the whole point?

Follow up:

Actually, just thinking about this. They may have said that any child turning up in own clothes and not paying could go to isolation. We get a lot of kids not paying, which is poor form. Probably just a threat again but if it's the case please support the school to encourage students to donate in this.

I think you need to contact the year head directly for clarification and to raise your concerns. Hopefully it is simply an ill thought out comment in response to some kids saying they won't bother paying in a callous way, and won't actually be enforced. Not great, but sometimes we all say things without thinking it through properly.

If, however it is the agreed policy then you'll need to point out the inconsistencies amd ask them to change it.

A charity donation cannot be compulsory.

The "it's only a couple of quid" attitude drives me mad.

I by no means live in poverty, just an average family, we do ok. But I actually only have £14 in my bank account until pay day, just an accumulation of things this month means it's been tight, I still need to lay my commute to work so the money is accounted for. I couldn't find another £4 this week (2kids). For me its just a bad week for some families this could make them feel truly awful about their already dire circumstances. Shocking on behalf of the school.

Strawberry are you saying that you would support a child being put in isolation if they came in own clothes but didn't make a donation?

'in isolation'

God, what does that actually mean?

My ds school sent a note saying that a donation was expected for something. I queried and they immediately backtracked and sent out a revised note. I think it probably was a typo tbh as they never have before. I have no objection to non uniform days but I choose how to give and don't always want to support the schools choice so on those occasions I do not

In isolation usually means that the children complete their classwork in a separate classroom from their peers, sometimes including social times. They are generally supervised by pastoral staff.

They can't do this. They just can't. That's just... wow.

I was the kid who didn't turn up with the donation on non-school uniform days because my mum couldn't spare the bingo money money. It was bad enough rocking up in my ankle-swinging tracksuit bottoms and school shoes combo, let alone being made to spend the day in isolation as punishment for being poor. Which is absolutely what this is.

Ask some other parents if they've been told the same by their DC. Then go in and formally complain.

It's not a donation if they're coerced into giving them their money, strawberry.

Strawberry one of my dc has aspergers and will therefore repeat word for word what has been said. Usually very accurately.
Surely your last post still discriminates? That is any child who comes in own clothes but doesn't pay because they can't rather than won't with go into isolation or has to wear uniform when everyone else is in home clothes?

I get that there are families who can but won't but that shouldn't punish those who genuinely can't surely?

I really hate this!
We can afford to give, but I hate the pressure on those who can't.
I remember a few years ago when Madelin Mccan went missing and the school pressganged kids into giving to her parents 'fund' not even a charity, and many of us were so angry and boycotted.
Keep this stuff out of schools, families can make their own decisions about how much they can afford, and the causes they can and want to give to.

It is secondary school. I get there are children who won't hand it over I really do. But when we were well and truly on the bones of our backside school wouldn't have had a clue. You cannot always judge.

Yanbu. Two quid to someone on benefits is a fortune. And what if they have two kids at the school?

To clarify, the school will isolate anyone poor in attempt to raise money for the poor. I would be livid.