Should I get the morning after pill?

[jamesdeandaydream]

Last night I got very, very merry and had unprotected sex with an ex 'friend with benefits'.

Should I risk it or go and get the pill? I still feel tipsy so I'm not thinking straight!

Posting here for traffic

OneMore but what harm will taking the MAP cause?

Heavy bleeding, nausea, breast pain etc.

Personally, I don't want to take a massive dose of hormones on the off chance and I'm prepared to accept the potential consequence of a more unpleasant procedure. Since they are my consequences, that's my choice.

Again, others see it differently.

One Still more risks than a morning after pill. Also the added risk that you'd have a period as usual, no positive test until later on and not realise you were pregnant until after a medical termination was no longer possible and it'd be surgical instead.

The risks involved in a medical abortion, or a surgical one, versus the risks from taking a map should surely be factored into your 'risk assessment'?

It's your choice so fair enough, but I honestly didn't think anyone would think like that so was concerned you could one day put yourself at risk unnecessarily. You do seem to know about the risks though so I'll remain baffled but shut up now.

OP - you may never go out of style.....but neither does protection. So glad you opted to take the MAP!

Thanks for engaging with me on it politely, Waggle

Is it due to side effects you've previously experienced then? I've been lucky that I've taken the MAP twice and never had a negative side effect.

It is indeed your choice and hopefully you aren't ever in the position of needing to make the decision.

No experience of either but thanks for your comment, I too hope it won't ever be an issue.

I am so surprised that someone would risk a pg because they are essentially too fucking lazy to nip down to boots and get the MAP because that 'can just have an abortion instead'. Fuck me. I'm very pro choice, but abortion should not be used as the first line of birth control. FFS.

We are past the first line of of birth control here. Nowhere has OneMore said she wouldn't use condoms.

The MAP does have side effects, and it is entirely reasonable to rather not risk those side effects if a pregnancy isn't even certain.

Medicamental abortion is still possible some weeks into the pregnancy, so it is not as if we are talking MAP versus surgery here.

Thanks, VV.

Unless you want a baby then of course you should take the MAP. Hope you get on well at the chemist OP.

One, your "risk assessment" is fucking ridiculous.

Why is it fucking ridiculous (thanks for the swearing, by the way)?

It's me making medical decisions for myself.

Do you all use the morning after pill after having sex with condoms, because the condom might have broken without you noticing? If not, why not?

The reactions to OneMore's statement seem to be rather emotional more than rational.

It's medication, either way. The only difference is that the MAP is not an abortion. That's it.

The likelihood of side effects may be higher with abortion, I don't know about the details, but if One decides that it is worth the risk, then that's a rational choice.

If I go to the dentist and say I only want something against the pain if and when it proves necessary, that also bears the risk of me having a numb tongue for hours afterwards, AND having suffered some pain, instead of just having the numb tongue.

Would the judgement here be as severe? I doubt it.

Totally agree, VV. As it's my (hypothetical) risk, not sure why some are reacting in the way they are, rather than stating for them the balance of risk feels different, say.

If it's on the NHS you might not be able to get one at 5 weeks? They could make you wait A LOT longer.

I also think there is a difference between not knowing you have risked pregnancy and knowing full well you have.

In the case of the later a IUD or MAP are eminently sensible options if you don't want a baby.

I'm not judging one btw, apologies if it was read like that. I was just trying to understand the decision-making process.

The medical/surgical thing isn't all that relevant to it I don't think. I was able to have a medical termination but chose surgical to have it all done in one day, the risks are pretty low (as are the risks of the MAP). It's more that the recovery period isn't pleasant and something that most people would avoid where possible. One is an adult though, she can weigh up the risks of all possible decisions and do what she feels is best for herself.

Nah, OddSocks, you've been very nice and haven't sworn at me unlike some

Furiosa, it's fair to say that as part of my risk assessment, I might call up Marie stopes and make a provisional appointment.

I also have enough £ to have a private abortion and accept that's subconsciously part of the assessment.

It's all well and good to hypothetically say you would do "xyz" One but to me it is a very bizarre and yes ignorant stance.

If you want to prevent a pregnancy and can do so with one pill [which these days has much fewer side effects] then why would you take any chance at all by not doing so?

It's very obvious you have absolutely no experience with regards to abortion as I am pretty sure if you had been there or had someone close go through one you wouldn't have such a blasé attitude.

I think it's very cavalier to view abortion in the way you. It's a last resort not the first port of call.

I accept that I might think afterwards that the medical abortion, if needed, was in fact unpleasant enough that my risk judgement was wrong, although I will remind you that the significantly more likely outcome is no abortion.

Yes, I have no experience of either but I suspect that's the case for many in this situation.

Why do you think I'm being blasé and cavalier , though, when I have clearly thought it through, albeit coming to a different conclusion to you?

Glad the swearing has stopped, though.

That sounds sensible one but I still would advise you if you ever found yourself in this situation (fingers crossed you don't!) that the MAP is the best way to avoid unwanted pregnancy and unnecessary abortion (even though it's not always effective, if it's not then termination is still an option).

I have experience of both. I'd always recommend the MAP.

Thanks Furiosa

Can I just point out the MAP is free wherever you get it. Depending where you are in your cycle you might also be recommended to have a copper IUD fitted. Might be a good idea for preventing pregnancy if you have a tendancy to get carried away in the moment but obviously doesn't protect against STIs so if it would reduce your likelihood of using condoms when having casual sex probably not such a great idea.

Having an abortion rather than taking the MAP or an IUD fitted, not such a great idea. If you know you have bad side effects from taking the MAP get an IUD fitted.

One I fell pregnant after a condom issue... had no idea condom hadn't worked and had no idea I was fertile (it was a one off "friends who overlapped to sex" situation).

Having an abortion involved several GP visits, plus a visit to the clinic and a day long stay as an outpatient for the actual procedure. The procedure itself was essentially a D&C under conscious sedation (I was about 8-9w) and although not an awful experience it is something I have never wanted to repeat. So yes I do think it's blasé and cavalier to think "oh i'll just have an abortion" when you have no real understanding about it.

Compare popping one pill to the above situation. The MAP would have prevented me using valuable resources, missing work new job not to mention the emotional and physical implications of having a termination.

Having a private abortion really doesn't make it any more pleasant (nor having it at an earlier gestation - I've had two close friends have horrible experiences with the pill which is what is now used for abortions at less than 8w gestation) so that is a red herring.

For what it's worth I truly have no regrets about my decision but fuck me if I'd known and had the option of the MAP, thus being able to avoid a termination then I would have!