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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think all babies should be DNA tested at birth

314 replies

ohagape · 04/12/2015 10:25

After reading that awful thread in step parenting where the poor guy wasn't even his 'sons' father and handed loads of money over to the horrible sounding mother, I really think all babies should be DNA tested as soon as they are born with the potential father/s, whether from a good relationship or not.

It would save a lot of heartbreak and wasted time and money. It can easily be told by blood types. My whole life my mum told me I had a different blood type. Then when I found out at my booking bloods and told her she got really confused about my dad's blood type. I really thought my dad wasn't my dad so he went and did a DNA test to reassure me. AIBU to think this should be a routine thing at all births and father's name shouldn't be on the birth certificate until it's done?

OP posts:

abbieanders · 04/12/2015 15:03

why would you have a problem with the hospital having it on file?

To what purpose?

Also, it supports the presumption that women are mendacious - what other routine tests should be done, now that we've created a law based on women's innate dishonesty?

choli · 04/12/2015 15:04

Interesting that nobody has mentioned the right of the child to have an accurate family medical history.

Enjolrass · 04/12/2015 15:04

but I don't get this 'I can be trusted so I shouldn't have to' attitude

I would have had kids if dh didn't trust me, or I didn't trust him. Because we would never have got married.

If you can't manage to trust your partner, there are serious issues.

BeyondThirty · 04/12/2015 15:05

Still no answer what happens with twins.

Do we trust the woman that twin A is the father? Or say it could be either and both pay half the maintenance? Hardly fair the that she gets more trust than the rest of the population...

Enjolrass · 04/12/2015 15:07

Interesting that nobody has mentioned the right of the child to have an accurate family medical history.

most children do. Are you suggesting everyone should submit to this because a very small amount of people lie?

So bizarre!

Lozza1990 · 04/12/2015 15:10

Women are not mendacious, some people are. Both men and women. If there is or ever could be a cost effective way of automatically DNA testing every child then I don't see why anyone would object to it. None of the points anyone has mentioned are more relevant than even just a few children potentially being saved some heartache in years to come. Jeremy Kyle may even have to retire.

almondpudding · 04/12/2015 15:13

LighteningGirl, how are you proposing they enforce the tests, as you are in favour of them.

Do you think fathers who refuse to be tested should be sent to prison? Should they be physically forced to give a sample?

How would you enforce it?

DrDreReturns · 04/12/2015 15:14

Still no answer what happens with twins.

Current technology can't distinguish between identical twins, so if both twins could be the father there's no way currently to say which one is the actual father.

I don't think this would be common - I worked in forensic DNA profiling for six years (similar technology) and only came across a situation like this once.

VestalVirgin · 04/12/2015 15:14

So then, why not lie detector tests for men? After all, most cheating partners don't father a child.

But really, if you don't trust someone, don't have children with them. It does in no way negatively affect you to raise a child that is not related to you.

What about demanding from men that they prove they have never been criminal and that they have no STDs prior to getting into a sexual relationship with them? That would prevent actual harm and heartbreak.
A lie detector test for any undetected crimes should also be included. Paid for by the government, as domestic violence prevention.

Men who have sexually harrassed a woman should have this tattooed on their foreheads so that no unsupecting woman falls for them.

abbieanders · 04/12/2015 15:15

If there is or ever could be a cost effective way of automatically DNA testing every child then I don't see why anyone would object to it.

My child's DNA - and mine, for that matter - is private. I would not consent to have it recorded on a database while she is a minor. If she cares to have her DNA held in that manner, she can wait until my consent is no longer needed.

squoosh · 04/12/2015 15:16

'None of the points anyone has mentioned are more relevant than even just a few children potentially being saved some heartache in years to come.'

Great argument.

Did you stamp your feet too?

squoosh · 04/12/2015 15:18

Why not develop a test to see which men are most likely to turn break off contact with their children after a relationship breakdown? That will surely save a lot of heartache.

MrsUltra · 04/12/2015 15:20

Tell you what we could do, we could harvest all eggs at birth and women have to apply to get their own egg IVFed by their chosen father, at such a point that they want to be pregnant. No need for a dna test then

goodnessgraciousgoudaoriginal · 04/12/2015 15:20

Err...

surely the current system, where a man can insist on a paternity test if he wants one, is the correct approach? It's not like men have no right to go down that route.

What a bloody waste of time, money and resources otherwise!

VestalVirgin · 04/12/2015 15:28

surely the current system, where a man can insist on a paternity test if he wants one, is the correct approach?

I think it is rather a rather shitty thing to do if he is still in a relationship with the mother, but if he wants to, I'd much rather he admit that he thinks she's a lying liar, and then has to deal with the consequences this has for the relationship, than the government assuming that women are liars by default and spending large sums of money on such a stupid idea.

goodnessgraciousgoudaoriginal · 04/12/2015 15:30

beyondthirty - actually I think it's extremely common for people not to know their blood type in the UK. Most people I know either have no idea, or only found out when they were pregnant as it turned out they were rhesus negative.

That's also bollocks on the blood type.

I am O negative. I know that my mother is A. My dad by default must be O.

I could be either A or O, but the O type isn't always recessive. Same on the rhesus factor. If one parent is negative and one positive, then a resulting child could be either.

expatinscotland · 04/12/2015 15:33

YABU.

Waste of money.

goodnessgraciousgoudaoriginal · 04/12/2015 15:36

vestal - Well, whether it's a shitty thing to do or not is irrelevant. If a man has reason to believe that a child isn't his, then he can, should and DOES have the right to insist on a test to prove paternity. Whether he is a paranoid fool, or has something justified behind that is no-one else's business really.

Likewise, the woman involved has the total right to end the relationship with the man if she cannot get over the insult to her dignity.

If the woman involved isn't prepared to agree to the test, then the man shouldn't be obliged to remain on the birth certificate, or have any sort of parental responsibility.

The more worrying issue is this ridiculous assumption that every single person should be OBLIGED to have a DNA test at birth for absolutely no reason whatsoever other than a small portion of the population enforcing their paranoia on everyone else!

BarbarianMum · 04/12/2015 15:37

Actually your dad could be either AO or BO or OO but not AB, AA or BB.

MovingOnUpMovingOnOut · 04/12/2015 15:43

Or maybe we could just get the state to decide who should be allowed to have children? Perhaps even pairing people up to give the most socially acceptable result?

You wouldn't need the DNA test then because none of those undesirable types would ever get a licence.

Crazypetlady · 04/12/2015 15:44

YABVU
The NHS staff are stretched enough without maternity ward punch ups.
Jeremy Kyle could get in on it. Would save on Creche staff for his show.
Jeremy kyle special...Live from the maternity ward!

MovingOnUpMovingOnOut · 04/12/2015 15:47

Both my parents are B, one rhesus positive, the other negative.

I'm O- blood type but DM assumed I was B because her grasp of biology is not good. She knew I was rhesus neg because she is and had to be tested because of the blue baby risk. My sibling is rhesus positive but I don't know what blood type.

Lweji · 04/12/2015 15:50

BTW, it should be blood type 0 not O. For zero (as in without A or B antigens).

VestalVirgin · 04/12/2015 15:55

More sensible idea: Have both parents tested for blood type before trying to conceive.
That would give women the opportunity to opt out of a risky pregnancy in case of non-compatible blood types. And therefore have an actual medical use.

(I don't know my blood type because I would have to pay to have it tested. It was tested at some point after my birth, but of course my dear parents lost the papers, and can't remember. I am still rather certain I am related to both of them. )

MovingOnUpMovingOnOut · 04/12/2015 16:00

Not that much more sensible VestalVirgin. How many "non-compatible blood types" are there?

More sensible option: Don't make silly rules for the majority because of the actions of a tiny few. Manage situations on an exception basis.

The op is ridiculous.

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