To beg DP to rehome his bird before I totally lose it

[Chala86]

It's a cockatiel. DP has had it since he was a teenager. I have two other parrots - this would be his argument to keep it. But it's driving me up the bloody wall with its constant shouting. It never shuts up and I feel like I'm going crazy. If he paid it any attention ever (which he doesn't) or looked after it (I do) then that would be one thing. But I'm expected to be at home with it day in day out listening to its incessant whingy squawking while he's at work. I'm not cruel - if I was it wouldn't be alive - but I swear to God it's so tempting to open the door and let it out. I've tried asking nicely. I've tried losing my temper. So wwyd? Is begging too much? Someone please save me!

I think as soon as you are doing all the care and spending on an animal then it becomes your pet and your responsibility, he has forfeited his rights, so I wouldn't even ask I would just do what you feel is right.

I have cockatiels they are not noisy because they are not alone. Cockatiels should never be kept on their own because they naturally live in groups/flocks.

Get the poor bird a friend/mate or rehome it to someone who already has a/some birds.

The bird should come first. Record it. Play the whole thing back to him. Tell him it is screeching because it is distressed. If he doesn't realise it needs to go to the aviary, you take it. Otherwise you will have to listen to a distressed animal all day knowing it is unhappy. I think pissing off your dp is better than trying to ignore a sad bird when you know it could live amore happy life

It's screaming because it's alone. To a flock bird to be alone is to be in danger. It's also brain numbingly bored to the point of being neurotic because it's never been out its cage in its life. No amount of toys is enough.

And you know this because you give your parrots a better life and they are happy.

It's time to do the right think for this bird. It's cruelty plain and simple.

Please re-home it asap, OP. You can tell him you looked up advice to stop it screeching and discovered about behaviour and how unhappy it is.

Think of it like a little puppy stuck in a tiny cage, looking at you mournfully and whining and crying... cos it is the same, just less cute to our human eyes.

Your partner is cruel, unreasonable and selfish. I'm actually wondering if you're frightened of what he will do if he comes home and finds the bird gone. Don't let him know it's whereabouts. Are you worried it will escalate something else/the way he treats you?

Any update on getting the bird rehomed (or the DP)???

Are these people with the aviary friends? Could they talk to DH about how the bird will be happier, he can still visit it, etc? I really does sound like the animal is not happy, and if he cares about the bird, he should want it in an evnironment where it is happier.

I used to have cockatiels. The poor bird. It needs company, preferably the company of other tiels, or failing that, a human who it's bonded to and has lots of time to spend with it. It obviously isn't getting that in your home.

Your husband sounds very insensitive and uncaring, both of the bird and you. What happens if it starts to self mutilate? Will he take the animal's distress seriously then?

Do you have any petting zoos near you? If they have an aviary, then that could be an option. Sounds as if the wee thing would be much happier surrounded by its own kind.

I'm not normally in favour of rehoming pets but your friend's offer to house the bird in an aviary with other cockatiels sounds much better than it being stuck in a cage on it's own.

I would level with your partner that either he steps up and takes care of the bird or rehomes it. Since you don't want the bird, he can't expect you to take on all care and pay all expenses. He is BU. He can't have it both ways, either the bird is his responsibility, in which case he has to handle care and expenses, or your responsibility, in which case you can rehome it.

I think this would put me right off the man. being cruel (and he IS being cruel) to animals isn't a very attractive trait. Wouldn't want to have a baby wit this man....

Tbh, if he doesn't care at all for the bird yet would pick it over you you have bigger worries than the noise.