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AIBU?

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Original poster

To find posting pictures on facebook of all your gifts tacky?

107 replies

chumbler · 13/11/2015 02:27

Ugh is it just my friends? when it's someone's birthday / leaving do / baby shower (!?) / end of school year they post pictures of all their cards and presents set out in a big pile. Drives me mad!! And sure I will see a LOT of this on Christmas!!

OP posts:
FlowersAndShit · 13/11/2015 08:49

Family member posted pictures of a sea of christmas gifts she's bought her kids for christmas throughout the year. Literally about 100 presents and she always complains that she's 'skint'. She starts talking about Christmas in September and already has halloween outfits for her kids for next year. I'm starting to think there is something really wrong with her! Oh and the gushy facebook posts when her boyfriend buys her flowers or expensive gifts saying how he is the best boyfriend in the world when we all know he's a useless, selfish weed addict and they are always splitting up and getting back together.

AnnaMarlowe · 13/11/2015 08:55

My normally very sensible friend posted a picture of her child standing next to a tower of unwrapped presents, in order to show that the stack was taller than the child.

I felt really quite uncomfortable with the picture but couldn't quite put my finger on why.

She's a lovely person in real life but often 'over shares' on FB.

hebihebi · 13/11/2015 08:57

I remember someone posting a photo of a huge pile of Easter presents for her daughters. Easter presents? I had never even heard of such a thing. But yes, lots of my friends post photos of their Christmas "piles". It is tacky but it doesn't bother me. I suppose they have gone to a lot of effort to buy things, wrap them up and make everything look nice and they want to share that. I don't do it though.

Efferlunt · 13/11/2015 08:58

I don't get this but I have a friend who posts a picture of all the presents her DD receives from others with a caption like 'thank you Aunty X for DD's new toy, she loves it!' Personally I think she should pm that picture to the person in question or just write them a thank you note. Drives me mad.

Vedamakesthebesttoast · 13/11/2015 09:08

Ugh, my cousins wife posted a picture of the anniversary present she got last year, bags of high end 'label' all turned to face the camera front on, the day before her anniversary this year. The comment was something along the lines of "x number years of being spoilt rotten by my wonderful husband, can't wait to see what I get tomorrow"..... I wanted to vomit...

TACKY

Lndnmummy · 13/11/2015 09:09

Very tacky, very

Madbengalmum · 13/11/2015 09:11

It is the same with cars, holidays and experiences, and why i would never bother with facebook.

gamerwidow · 13/11/2015 09:11

I don't like this. It feels boastful and designed to make other people feel inadequate. I do take pictures of my dd opening Xmas and birthday presents because to like to capture the excitement on her face but it don't post them. I did post a picture of the papier mache 'surprise egg' I made to put her birthday presents in this year because it took me ages to make and I was pleased with it but not the presents inside. I will also admit to sometimes posting pics of dd using presents other people have given her to say thank you too which might be a bit hypocritical?

usual · 13/11/2015 09:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

wickedwaterwitch · 13/11/2015 09:15

I couldn't care less what people post pictures of.

If my friends want to show their friends their new bags / presents that's fine with me, I don't see the problem myself.

wickedwaterwitch · 13/11/2015 09:15

Quite, usual. It seems hyper critical to me too. Who cares? Live and let live.

hebihebi · 13/11/2015 09:18

I don't think people do it to make others feel inadequate. They are just sharing good things and hope their friends and family will be happy for them.

I have a relative who seems to go on a lovely holiday abroad every month. Of course I'm jealous but it's her life and she's happy. Maybe one day I'll have the money to travel abroad. I prefer people to share positive things rather than moan all the time.

MaxPepsi · 13/11/2015 09:19

I posted my 'hoard' of cards and presents that I got for my 40th. I used it as my cover photo.

Couldn't give a shiny shit if people think it's tacky. I was really pleased with everything I got as apart from my husband and a couple of friends genuinely was not expecting all that I got.

I wanted to show them off, so I did!

randomcatname · 13/11/2015 09:25

oh YANBU. Whatever the reason for showing them off it's insensitive to others who may not have as much. I'm on fb to enjoy it and my friends. I would never want to inadvertently make them feel shit about what they can/can' afford.

Vedamakesthebesttoast · 13/11/2015 09:28

I think it's fine if the tone of it is in gratitude, especially here's my dd wearing the lovely jumper soandso kindly gave her for her birthday... Or a cake you baked sitting on the cake stand great Aunty beryl bought you with a comment saying how much use your getting out of it. That's lovely.... But if the tone is grabby in a simple look at all this designer shot people gave me then it is tacky imo. There are nice sentiments and not so nice sentiments and I appreciate seeing genuine gratitude and pleasure rather the avarice.

AnnaMarlowe · 13/11/2015 09:30

Can I ask Max why you wanted to show them off?

Not being rude- just interested.

Pre-Facebook would you have laid them all out for visiting friends or shown them pictures at work or in the pub?

Whoknewitcouldbeso · 13/11/2015 09:32

You've only got to count the threads on here after Christmas and Valentine's day to see how upsetting Facebook is to many people.

My Mum is a carer for my Dad. She is in excellent health and a really positive person, yet tells me regularly that all the posts from her 'friends' showing off about their fancy holidays and exciting social life really upsets her as it makes her realise just how crap her life is. I wish she'd come off of it but she likes to keep in touch with the world Sad

I wish it didn't have this painful underbelly for so many people but sadly it does

pudcat · 13/11/2015 09:32

When I see the photos of mountains of presents, I feel like going and wrapping huge quantities of boxes, cereal packets, any food box etc. Then post photo saying Santa has been good this year Smile

usual · 13/11/2015 09:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

JasperDamerel · 13/11/2015 09:36

One my friends had a birthday yesterday. She posted pictures of her presents, the drawings and cards her children had made, the family celebrations, the lovely gift from her husband.

She wasn't doing it to boast or make others feel bad. She was sharing a good moment in her life. She shares the bad times, too.

I live geographically far away from lots of people I care about. If you are likely to see all of your FB friends every month, then maybe it's tacky. But I really like to keep up to date with the lives of the friends who I rarely see in person. And that means knowing about the lovely presents they got, and the nice meal they went to, and their worry waiting for the results of their blood tests and the problems they are having caring for an elderly parent and their pride at having done an amazing thing at work and their humiliation on the day when they cocked up. I'd be really sad if my friends stopped sharing the good times in case it was boasting, and stopped sharing the bad times in case it was attention seeking and just posted pictures of other people's kittens all day so as not to offend anyone.

VocationalGoat · 13/11/2015 09:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

munkisocks · 13/11/2015 09:42

I just asked dh if he would be doing this with our dd and he said no lol. I can't with Facebook for these reasons.

Off topic but why do people buy presents for siblings of the birthday child? Shouldn't they wait until it's THEIR birthday? I really can't understand this. I know there's the whole not wanting to make them feel left out but it's not their day lol.

Crabbitface · 13/11/2015 09:42

usual

I'm glad I don't have 'friends' like you miserable lot on my FB.

I couldn't agree more. Facebook is not compulsory. If it makes you feel bad delete your account and read a book. Folk get judged for:

  • pics of kids
-pics of pets
  • tagging yourself on nights out
  • holidays
-presents -new clothes/bags/shoes

What exactly do you want facebook to be? Live and let live or delete. Simple.

munkisocks · 13/11/2015 09:43

CBA with Facebook I mean*

Vedamakesthebesttoast · 13/11/2015 09:45

Usual I agree to an extent though I don't honk it's a car of fun isn't for you put the types of friends you have on fb. I'm very selective about my fun friends... Only actual rl friends and none of those old school acquaintances from twenty odd years ago that I bumped into in the shop one day and then got a friend request from. Unfortunately though sometimes family can't be filtered just quite as much!

I'm always sensitive about what I post. For example I had two rounds of if and multiple gynae surgeries before we had our children so would never on a million years announce a pregnancy with a scan picture and a guess what comment. Those really hurt, especially as the only scan images we saw were miscarriages for years. Just because it's on line doesn't mean people have the right to be more inconsiderate than they would be in rl.