To complain to this teacher (and what do I say)?

[MerryMarigold]

Dd (Y2) started a new school on Monday. The school uniform says PE kit should be school T shirt and black shorts. Before she started and I was in school, I saw some of the older girls doing PE in cycling shorts, so I assumed black leggings would be ok and sent her in with these in her PE kit.

Anyway, she had PE on Wednesday and came home saying she is not allowed the leggings and needs black shorts. Fine , I will go to the uniform shop at the weekend, which is probably the only place you can get them at this time of year. Then yesterday she had PE again and had to sit out because she didn't have the shorts. Apparently you can't do gymnastics in leggings. She was sad as they were playing stuck in the mud which she loves. I really don't see why you can't wear leggings to play that!

This is not some posh school, it is a state school in a fairly deprived area. At our last school we didn't even have a pointless PE uniform.

I just feel it was very unkind to make a small girl sit out of PE which she loves, single her out in her first week at a new school and give me one evening's notice to get shorts for her.

So, anyway, do I bring this up with class teacher (who is lovely)? Or PE teacher herself? And what do I say?

Fair enough

Giles, absolutely. And I am not saying that the teacher in this case is right - as I said upthread, I probably wouldn't have done exactly what the teacher did in this case, especially had I known the specific circumstances of this pupil. (Though I have bad days, as we all do)

But I am trying to provide, perhaps, a slightly different 'collective' viewpoint.

Some people do think for themselves, and sometimes what they think is "this isn't worth making a fuss over".

As I have said before, I can see it seems as if energy is being spent on something petty when you look at it at the '1 child' level. On a collective level, it takes HUGELY less energy to have a ritual 'no kit = sit out' policy for all, every week than choosing to evaluate every child's non-unform kit against a notional 'fitness for the specific purpose of this lesson' standard.

I don't disagree with that. But rules need to be applied with some common sense and discretion, and if you only have essential rules and you apply them sensibly, you'll spend less time enforcing and more time teaching :).

I can think of no where else in the world, except perhaps in some South East Asian countries like Singapore, where trained teaching professionals spend so much teaching time policing children's dress.

I haven't read the whole thread so this might already have been said. When I was teaching children weren't allowed to wear leggings for gymnastics, I think it was due to them being slippery and unsafe on climbing apparatus. The teacher in this case might have failed somewhat in communicating with the OP but they will be following a rule which is probably not just a school rule but the whole local Authority. If he/she fails to follow the rule and there is an accident, even if Leggings didn't cause the accident, there could be repercussions. The same applies to ear rings which were always the cause of complaints from parents - well, so-and-so's teacher lets her wear them..

And that is how the problem starts.....

easy enough maybe.

til you can't get your size, you change schools and are trying to get organised on limited funds in a shirt space of time, house fires where people lost most their stuff I'm sure finding the "right ones" is teh least of someone's worries.

kits get left at non resident parents house, left in a friends car, money is rather tight one month etc

would you expect to have to explain private aspects of your life or difficult relation ships with exes on order for your child to be treated in a fair manner and nor made to sit out of things or do you expect a perfectly functional item used twice a week for an hour would suffice witg no fuss.

Merry I sympathise. YANBU.

New school, don't have quite the right kit anyway (no t-shirt in stock for you to buy), no one mentioned it to you personally, first week so you don't know the timetable, also you don't have the experience of knowing which teachers are strict on this stuff or not - I would certainly raise it with the class teacher. Because in week 1 of a new school, at 7 years old, anything like this is a HUGe BIG DEAL to your DC. And school - if it is a nurturing environment that wants the Dc to do best - should be on the lookout for helping a new child (and their parent!) settle in.

If the teacher tore strips off her or shouted at her for not having the shorts then yes, I would be annoyed.

But if she said nicely, or even neutrally, that she'd have to sit out until mummy was able to buy her the correct shorts, that's hardly going to be A BIG DEAL.

Seriously, you can't protect kids from every disappointment or inconvenience. They're going to have to go out into the real world some day and just suck some things up.

Misit,

I actually can't remember - either in the schools I've taught in with strict uniform, or in my current one - the last time I spent teaching time policing dress. Children's break time? Yes occasionally. Before school on the playground? Yes, that's usually where the staff on duty - obviously not teaching - will pick up anything egregious. Otherwise, it takes no time at all to say 'No kit, can't find anything in the 'spares box? Take a sheet to take notes on and a letter to take home'

It's true wellies that you shouldn't protect them from every inconvenience. But when you're first week in a new class, and wanting very much to fit in, I think it's a bit different to the usual "forgot to bring your kit back after half-term" scenario. So that's what I would be speaking to the school about. My DD would have found that a big deal in week 1 of a new school at 6/7.

you can't protect kids from every disappointment or inconvenience

Yes, true, but dd is very into feeling 'embarrassed' at the moment and is a shy, quiet girl. (Ds2 maybe wouldn't be that bothered other than he loves PE!). I think sitting out would be bad enough, but in a place where she doesn't know people (kids or teachers) or have friends yet, it would be doubly hard.

But why on earth should someone have to tell the school.

people should be treated in a certain way because that's what's the right thing to do is.

not because they tick box number for on acceptable circumstances list that exempts them from a teacher on a power trip.

x post squirrels, you said it better

But Giles what about the kids that just don't bother to bring their PE gear in or don't want to wear it or whatever. Do you just assume that they're having problems at home?

Like it or not, parents do have to let school know about things that they mightn't tell other people.

I have been there recently, Merry. Wrong colour trainers. We moved from a non-uniform school, and it's been a hard learning curve for me!

I have never seen a child sent into school with leggings for indoor PE. What did she wear at the last school? PE teacher is a stickler for the rules. I say good on her.

But if that's the case Merry why did you send her in with leggings in the first place? Especially after it had been pointed out to you that this was not acceptable. You seem to be blaming the teacher for something that is actually your fault.

If I were shy and easily embarrassed, I'd want my mum to quietly and quickly buy me the new shorts, rather than draw further attention to me by not letting the issue drop, tbh.

I have - it does happen. And you know what? The world keeps on turning.

Well provided what they have or what they are wearing is clean and safe to use fir the activity then why make a fuss at all. it's in school ffs no one's even going to see it.

Squirrels, ds1's school was non uniform and I loved it!! And no, there was no competition for the best labels etc. just a lot more relaxing getting ready in the morning. Other DC was optional uniform but nothing set in stone for PE other than leggings/ shorts/ t shirt.

Ds1 put on trainers the other day without thinking about it. I spotted it walking into school and was mortified. Told him to apologise quickly to teacher before she noticed and told him off. It worked!

I feel like writing this in capital letters, wellies. I sent her in in leggings as I saw a bunch of the older girls in cycling shorts and coming from a school where everyone wore leggings for PE, I assumed most of the girls would be wearing leggings.

If I'd known she would be the ONLY girl in leggings and that she had PE 2 days running (she told me on the way home, no time to check when she next had PE) then I would never have sent her in in leggings. Also, if I'd had a letter or the PE teacher had spoken to me when she saw me picking Dd up and conveyed just how important it was, I would have gone to the uniform shop that day.

GAH!!!!

As a gymnastics coach I would not allow leggings in a club setting, but in a school or after school cub I would have no problem at all.