To be sad ds has been 'moved down a table'

[Givinguph0pe]

Ds is 6 and a half and in year 2.
In his own words he's been moved from the 'smart table to the not smart but not stupid table.'

I'm not hugely surprised as I don't think he's as bright as the children in the top ability group - except perhaps for numeracy. I feel stupidly sad though, especially as it seems to have knocked ds's confidence.

I'd be more worried about where he's got the "stupid" from than that he's being sat with peers of the same ability

And tell the school so they can address it with the children if it's from within the classroom.

Is it just him or has the whole class had a shuffle round?

i wouldn't feel stupidly sad for his lack of brightness at 6 and a half though perhaps you should send him to kumon for extra help, wouldn't want him on the stoopid table would you

Not related to OP but @ Honeydragon.
My DD is 2.5, she uses the word Stupid all the time, she got it from Judge Rinder and says it as "Stoooopid" lmao

I don't know - he's just start saying it this year. He started out saying he was on the 'smart' table but referred to other children as being on the 'stupid' table. To which I kept saying stupid wasn't a kind word and people have different strengths and weaknesses so they shouldn't just be labelled as 'smart' or 'stupid.' However I must admit I think this fell on deaf ears. I wonder if it's something someone in his class has said? Maybe they've heard it at home?

Did he really call the other table stupid? I would also be more concerned about that than the fact that he is working within his ability.

I hate the tables thing, DD spent all of year 2 on the same kind of ability table as it sounds like your DS is now on, and she was constantly annoyed that she wasn't on the top ability table. She felt that only the children on the top table "mattered".

I'm not sure if they've been reshuffled as a class. They do spend all their time in their ability group though and this teacher doesn't regroup them for numeracy of reading or topic etc.

We did talk a lot about how people are good at different things and how it's unkind to refer to people as 'stupid.' I talked about how people may need extra help for some things but everyone gets there and that other things like being kind and a good friend are more important than anything else.
But he's 6. It seems pretty black and white when you're 6 I suppose.

i gotta say, the whole tables thing seems so wrong to me. barf. your poor kid.

They were grouped last year but did mixed ability work too and changed groups for different things.
This year it seems 'that's your group so that's where you stay.'

I would be very concerned if my DCs would call the lower set the stupid table. I would have a good long chat about it and talk about respecting children of all abilities.

I have two DCs in year 4 and 5 and children move table all the time, because they struggle on one area, or with one concept. For example ds1 is very good at writings, he is very creative and his punctuation and grammar are good but he struggles with spelling. He has been moved down a table and put together with other children who struggle with spelling to try and improve. Also in mAths they might be moved down if they struggle with a concept (fractions for example) and when they catch up they will go up again. It's very mobile

I'd be going to speak to the teacher about the way the children see each other. This is exactly the reason we don't have ability tables, every lesson every child chooses a seat they feel they can work well in. In the early days yes they chose to sit with a friend but they soon work out that's not always their best working seat and move accordingly. Children shouldn't be seeing themself or others as stupid!

The stupid label sounds like it originated from a Kumon Maths parent.....

Do they still do tables at school? I assumed that was gone, I hated it when I was at school. And in my experience reflected ability less than who had the pushiest parents. From my primary class there are two Oxford, one Cambridge grad and a child who went to LSE and is now a PhD. None of them were ever in the top set.

Well of course it's knocked his confidence if he now sees himself as "not smart".

I bet the parents of the kids on the "stupid" table are having to do a lot more work to build up their DCs confidence, and are feeling even sadder.

I speak as a parent whose DH didn't sleep for whole night when he thought his PFB had been moved off the "top" table (he hadn't been) and have a child on the "stupid" table. Which would be fine, except she thinks it's wrong as she doesn't see herself as a "red" child. . She tells me she would be on a green table if they never had to write, and only had to talk.

So, I would say, don't be sad. Tables are transient things. Just because he's not on the top table now, doesn't mean he won't be next year. And just because those DC are on the top table now doesn't mean they'll be high earners in 20 years time.

Are you sure they're still in ability groups at all? When I got my class this year I sat them mixed ability, as that's by far what I prefer, and had a couple of children saying they'd 'got thick' because they were now sat with so and so. Besides that fact that their views of other children needed to be dealt with, they totally hadnt realised that the groups were in fact now a complete mix. Perhaps this is what has happened with your son?

My dds year 3 teacher will not group on tables by ability. For each task she puts up 3 levels of task and the children have a go at the level they think they can do. In her words each child brings something to the table more than their academic ability. They encourage each other and learn how to work independently.

No I'm absolutely certain it's by ability.

Thinking about lostscot's post, are you absolutely sure they are set ability tables?

The way lostsccot works is one method, but there are other methods where children have a set place but are given or choose work at their level. This sounds a bit more likely than having one set group for everything, especially if they changed groups for different subjects last year.

I know the other children fairly well and I'm certain they are in ability groups.

This is one of those things that will really stress you out now, but one day you will look back and laugh at yourself. I promise.

This is one of the reasons I have largely mixed ability tables!

I wouldn't see moving down as something to be sad about necessarily. He's moved to the table that best fits him and which works at the pace that suits him.

When ds got moved down to the bottom set for maths at school, it was the best thing ever for him. The teacher for that set was actually a lot better than the one for the middle set, and really got why the kids were struggling and how to make them understand. When he started doing better the school wanted to move him up again but I begged them not to. Where previously he would have struggled to pass Maths GCSE, he ended up with a B.