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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

WIBU to speak to neightbours about smoking?

96 replies

Fourfifthsof · 04/11/2015 18:24

My neighbours smoke outside in the back garden and the smell comes into my living room and into DS's room through our shut double glazed windows...

I acknowledge that I might be being a bit PFB about it but it smells quite strong and I don't like it. WIBU to speak to them about it? Just to ask them to move away from the house a bit? I am worried what is going to happen in the summer - we won't be able to open the windows without it smelling like a shisha cafe. Wink

I am not an anti smoker, I think people should be able to do what they like providing they are not hurting anyone else, I would just prefer it if they did it away from my window so they don't stink out the place. It's a rented place, so I could just tell the landlord but I think that's a bit passive aggressive... AIBU?

OP posts:
kua · 04/11/2015 18:28

Do you have the vents open on your windows? That might explain why the smell is getting in.

NettleFarseer · 04/11/2015 18:28

Yabu

Original poster
Fourfifthsof · 04/11/2015 18:31

Thanks Kua I'll check it out. I didn't realise there was such a thing as a vent tbh!

OP posts:
TeddTess · 04/11/2015 18:33

no YANBU but if you do speak to them (have you already?) be very nice and ask very nicely because they are well within their rights to refuse.

elelfrance · 04/11/2015 18:35

hmmm if they're smoking in their own back garden, they would be doing you a big favour by moving away from the house, they really wouldn't have to at all. if you take that into account when speaking to them , you might get a nice surprise

goodnightdarthvader1 · 04/11/2015 18:35

They're within their rights to refuse..... Unfortunately.

MumOnTheRunAgain · 04/11/2015 18:39

What's a landlord got to do with this?

WaitrosePigeon · 04/11/2015 18:39

I wouldn't move and I'm a smoker, sorry.

bimandbam · 04/11/2015 18:39

This drives me bonkers. I am an ex smoker and miss it very much. But my next door neighbours smoke outside on the front and it makes my bedroom stink.

Let me know how you get on!

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 04/11/2015 18:43

Well you can ask them but I'd imagine theyd pull a cats bum face as they are on their own property,
I would not appreciate someone telling me what to do and what not to do in my house, that I work dsmn hard for. I can tell you.
However that's not to say I don't sympathise with you though

imwithspud · 04/11/2015 18:46

It's a difficult one, obviously it's not nice for you, but they're well within their rights to smoke in their own back garden. If you can smell it through shut double glazed Windows then that tells me that your windows aren't that great in the first place, but short of convincing your LL to get them replaced there's obviously not a lot you can do about that..

You could always ask but keep it extra nice and un-narky.

howtorebuild · 04/11/2015 18:46

I don't think you can do anything about the situation other than move. Sad

SilentlyScreamingAgain · 04/11/2015 18:59

I'm a committed smoker; I'd move up th garden if someone asked nicely.

Aliceinwonderlust · 04/11/2015 19:01

You can't ask someone not to smoke in their own garden.

Brioche201 · 04/11/2015 19:01

How is it getting in through your double glazing?

Aliceinwonderlust · 04/11/2015 19:02

Its nothing to do with the landlord in terms of getting him to stop them somehow- but it does seem very strange the smell is coming through closed windows?

SoupDragon · 04/11/2015 19:03

How would you feel if they asked you to stop your DS from playing in your garden as they don't like it?

BerylStreep · 04/11/2015 19:03

The smell of smoke makes me feel really nauseas, but I agree, I don't think you can say anything to them.

DickDewy · 04/11/2015 19:06

Maybe it's coming in through your trickle vents?

I'd ask them to move - most reasonable smokers would be happy to do so, I think.

I do wish some smokers would think about where they smoke and move away from buildings.

Osmiornica · 04/11/2015 19:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WickedWax · 04/11/2015 19:07

When I was a smoker I was asked by my neighbours not to smoke near the fence as it was making their back bedroom smell. Our houses were detached and both gardens massive so I seriously doubted I was making their house smell, but they asked really nicely so I was fine with it.

About a month later I saw their 13 year old daughter nipping out the back for a sneaky cigarette every time her mum and dad went out. I quite enjoyed telling them.

3sugarsplease · 04/11/2015 19:07

Personally I don't think YABU.

My neighbour did the same and it completely infuriated me that during summer I couldn't have DS window open because his room would smell like smoke.

Personally I am a non smoker however my parents are and they completely respect the fact that others do not like the smell etc

Potatoface2 · 04/11/2015 19:11

is it cigarettes or something else?

Aliceinwonderlust · 04/11/2015 19:13

There is no way I'd stop smoking in my usual area in afraid. It would be like if you'd asked me not to now my lawn outside of times convenient to you. I'd think you should wind your neck in

SoleBizzzz · 04/11/2015 19:19

Yanbu