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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

WIBU to speak to neightbours about smoking?

96 replies

Fourfifthsof · 04/11/2015 18:24

My neighbours smoke outside in the back garden and the smell comes into my living room and into DS's room through our shut double glazed windows...

I acknowledge that I might be being a bit PFB about it but it smells quite strong and I don't like it. WIBU to speak to them about it? Just to ask them to move away from the house a bit? I am worried what is going to happen in the summer - we won't be able to open the windows without it smelling like a shisha cafe. Wink

I am not an anti smoker, I think people should be able to do what they like providing they are not hurting anyone else, I would just prefer it if they did it away from my window so they don't stink out the place. It's a rented place, so I could just tell the landlord but I think that's a bit passive aggressive... AIBU?

OP posts:
ILiveAtTheBeach · 05/11/2015 08:47

I'm a non smoker, I've never smoked - and even I think you would be ridiculous to ask them not to smoke in their own garden. Sorry.

balls2DWall · 05/11/2015 08:53

when they are inside and you cant be seen get a step a fire extinguisher and spray the ashtray tell em it caught fire :-)

JoySzasz · 05/11/2015 09:40

If you use a plug in. You will be adding more shit to your environment.
I woke try asking very nicely. It is very possible they have no idea, and wouldn't hesitate to stop.
They have every right to smoke. You have a right to try and improve your air quality.

m1nniedriver · 05/11/2015 10:12

I'm interested to find out their reaction OP. I think you should speak to them, politely and non judgementally. Keep us posted!

m1nniedriver · 05/11/2015 10:14

Am I wrong in thinking you just want them to be aware that where they smoke ATM means you house is getting wafted? Completely different if you want to tell them not to smoke in their garden at all Shock

space0bongo · 05/11/2015 10:22

I'd ask nicely and see what they say? If you mention your son, and make it clear that you would owe them one, they might surprise you. However do not then be surprised if they ask you to stop doing certain things too.

GruntledOne · 05/11/2015 12:02

I'm a non smoker, I've never smoked - and even I think you would be ridiculous to ask them not to smoke in their own garden

But she's not asking that, ILive. She's just asking them to move away a bit so they're not right under her windows. What's wrong with that?

specialsubject · 05/11/2015 12:18

unfortunately most smokers do not appear to have functioning noses or legs, and believe in the magic curtain which means that 'just outside' won't make the house stink or revolt the neighbours. They certainly aren't going to risk going out in that nasty wet rain for their fix.

if they were bothered they would move down the garden. They aren't.

Afraid there is absolutely nothing you can do. The tenancy may say 'no smoking in the house'. They aren't smoking in the house. No tenancy can ban smoking in the garden.

if it is illegal saddo sticks, you can do something. But standard nicotine is perfectly legal. Yes, it reeks, yes, it may trigger asthma. Tough, I'm afraid. They are more likely to die earlier of cancer than you - the amount coming in your house may be revolting but the mutagenic chemicals are in their lungs, not yours.

PeasinPod1 · 05/11/2015 12:20

OP YANBU I couldn't stand this and if it was creeping into DS room I'd be even angrier. I would def ask, in the gentlest, politest, most friendly way and ask even if they just move few steps to side/forwards or face different direction, anything would be hugely appreciated. Worth a try.

Gottagetmoving · 05/11/2015 13:00

I smoke outside in my back garden, and I am wondering now if it is annoying my neighbours. I think I will move to the bottom of the garden, because I do know that if my upstairs windows are open, the smell of the smoke is in those bedrooms so it may affect theirs too and they are nonsmokers,

I would tell your neighbour if I were you OP. They may be unaware like I have been

JoffreyBaratheon · 05/11/2015 13:46

That's what I don't get about my neighbours. They have 100 foot long garden. But they only smoke on their back doorstep. If the wind goes one way it blows into my kids' bedrooms. If it goes the other - the smoke must be back in their house, anyway. I also don't get why they are so literal at following this one council rule on their tenancy agreement yet flout all the others constantly! Smoking inside your own house would be the one thing everyone else down this street wouldn't shop them for...

Moonax · 05/11/2015 13:54

Worth asking them politely. I'm a smoker and acutely aware of just how much of a pariah I am, so would try to oblige.

For those wondering why they don't go to the end of the garden, the answer is likely to be that by the back door is out of the wind. Agreed, it could be the ashtray which stinks.

Gottagetmoving · 05/11/2015 13:59

That's what I don't get about my neighbours. They have 100 foot long garden. But they only smoke on their back doorstep

It may seem puzzling, but I do that too. I stay near the back of the house, mainly in cooler weather, because there is some protection from the wind/weather, plus you are not being watched/spied on by neighbours from their upstairs windows.

SarahSavesTheDay · 05/11/2015 14:04

What a pickle, OP. I would be extremely unhappy if my child's room smelled of smoke. Do you have a common landlord?

I agree that you must make it abundantly clear that you know you are asking them a favour when you do this. Perhaps take some baked goods when you go over.

Wheretheresawill1 · 05/11/2015 14:22

Since the smoking law took place I hate how outdoor ie fresh air spaces are now contaminated by people smoke.

Gottagetmoving · 05/11/2015 14:40

Since the smoking law took place I hate how outdoor ie fresh air spaces are now contaminated by people smoke

Seriously? I had not noticed the outdoors was full of smoke from cigarettes.
In the roads near us its BBQ smoke ( in the summer) and car fumes.
Can't say I have ever noticed clouds of ciggy smoke.

Janeymoo50 · 05/11/2015 14:46

I'd certainly move if I felt my smoke (and I do smoke about 3 or 4 a day in my garden) was going in someone's windows, why should they have to put up with my filthy smell. It's about common courtesy and being reasonable, it's possibly perfectly ok to move somewhere else in the garden to enjoy a fag.

HappenstanceMarmite · 05/11/2015 15:37

I also beheaded a cockerel

Today's winning quote! Smile

Original poster
Fourfifthsof · 05/11/2015 17:42

Update - after a day of sleuthing, we have worked it out!

It's not in the garden at all, they are chucking their dog ends into their fireplace / chimney and leaving them to smoulder there, hence why the smell has got worse over time - there must be more and more fag ends building up. We have shut the vents from our chimney but it still stinks...

I am going to speak to them very, very nicely about it tonight when they are all home as I am sure they are probably not aware that it is happening. I am sure they will be keen for it not to happen again once they are aware, as they are renting the house from our old neighbour and they are not supposed to be smoking inside at all.

I will be being very, very nice about it... Hopefully they won't tell me to FO. Wink

OP posts:
Original poster
Fourfifthsof · 05/11/2015 17:46

I should add that I have no intention whatsoever of grassing them up to their landlord - I just want the smell to go away! Sad

OP posts:
Alisvolatpropiis · 05/11/2015 18:03

That's foul!

Butter them up with cake...mention the smoking as they're cooing in gratitude!

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