To think that if a 13yo wets the bed he should strip the sheets?

[Saddlesore]

DS had a friend here for a sleepover last night and after he'd gone I went into his room to fold away the put-me-up bed. First of all I was hit by the smell of pee, and the friend's bed was totally sodden with it. I get that anyone can have an accident. I also get that maybe he was really embarrassed. But if that were the case, why leave the bed in that state? Like I'd never know?

DS strips his own sheets and loads them in the w/machine weekly - it's just one job on a very short list of his "chores", and I would like to think that if he were on a sleepover and had an accident he would strip the bed. And for any doubters out there, it was definitely his friend who spent the night in the spare bed, not DS - they were still asleep in their respective beds when I had to retrieve my toddler DD from their room this morning before she climbed on top of them! In fact, I remember thinking at the time that DD must have wet her nappy because I could smell pee, but was surprised to find it dry.

13 year old boys aren't exactly known for thinking things through. Poor little fucker. Don't be a dick about it.

Ds3 is nearly 11 and occasionally wets the bed as he is a very deep sleeper. He'd be mortified & wouid struggle to tell someone else's mum (& that's with it being very much a non-issue in our house)

You don't sound very kind, OP.

If I had a 13 year old who was a bed wetter I am not sure I would let them go on a sleepover - unless they took their own blow up bed and sleeping bag....

Next time put a waterproof sheet underneath, and maybe leave a spare set of sheets somewhere subtle but obvious.

Poor bugger.

OP I think your DS must be about 16/17 now. Maybe this boy felt especially embarrassed about peeing the bed during a sleepover with his older friend?

If I had a 13 year old who was a bed wetter I am not sure I would let them go on a sleepover - unless they took their own blow up bed and sleeping bag

Theres nothing to say he is a regular bed wetter. It could have been completely out of the blue and as much a shock to him as to the OP.

Are you absolutely sure that your son has never done this at someone elses house? Or left shit on their toilet seat? Or tormented their dog? Or broken something of value?

The other boy must be a really good friend of your son for him to risk having this happen . Most kids who have this problem just never go on sleepovers and miss out on so many things.

Now that you know about it, you can be better prepared next time. As other have said, leave out spare sheets ( discretely, so your son doesn't see ) and put a cover on the mattress.

Oh thats right Furiosa, I forgot that saddle sores son is 16 now . No wonder the poor 13 year old friend was embarrassed

I agree that you sound unkind and lacking in empathy.

The kid is 13, fgs. This whole 'he could have made so much of a better impression on me' thing you've got going on, is just odd.

Goodness, I'm glad my DS will never have a sleepover at your house. You sound so unkind and I think you should be ashamed of yourself.

Horrible way to think about a poor young kid who's probably feeling so ashamed and embarrassed that he did the only thing he felt he could do. Can't believe you have to ask why he might have done it that way.

Also one hugely idiotic comment on here. Boggles my mind that people can be so thick.

My DSS was still occasionally wetting the bed when one came to live with us at age 16. His mother had never got him any help and the poor lad had been drying his wet sheets in the airing cupboard. His bed must have smelt horrible. We encouraged him to ask medical advice and medication has helped greatly. He was always very embarrassed when he had to talk about it.

Sorry but YABU and a little unkind I think. The poor boy must be feeling mortified right now.

Really FlowersAndShit ? Because it is far more common than you'd think.

I hear you Furiosa

I think the OP WAS kind and understanding about the situation. As long as the kid isn't an avid reader of this forum then he'll never know she harboured an U thought for a moment. And was v lucky about the mattress protector.

Just don't see the point of the thread. At all.

You either understand and empathise, or you don't. And if you understood you wouldn't need to write up a nasty judgemental post about it.

Childhood bladder/bowel issues - very common. It seen as shameful, not shared and those parents not affected blissfully unaware. It can be difficult for these children to have equal access to activities such as sleepovers and school trips, for fear that something will go wrong, in view of their peers and that they will have to cope without parents. I don't know if this is a one-off for this particular child, or a long-standing problem but it's worth being aware of the possibility in any child that you have to tea or for a sleepover! FWIW, I was mortified when my constipation suffering DS wet himself at 9 during a playdate. I could tell that other mother was completely shocked.

Poor little soul.

13 yo boys don't volunteer information at the best of times, so I completey understand why he didn't say anything.

I feel utterly heartbroken for the poor boy. How awful for him.

Aw poor thing. Bet he's still thinking and embarrassed about it this evening!

I feel heartbroken as well for all kids that potentially face this situation

Your last post makes you sound like a complete wanker op.

Expecting him to strip the bed sheets is totally unrealistic - would draw far too much attention to why and does he even know where your machine is, is it currently being used, how to use it etc plus then the mattress will still be wet!

Best case would have been for him to have come and had a quiet word with you, and said what had happened. But maybe he didn't think you'd be the understanding type?

It's not ideal he just left them, but I can totally see why. Massive embarrassment.