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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that if a 13yo wets the bed he should strip the sheets?

138 replies

Saddlesore · 01/11/2015 19:07

DS had a friend here for a sleepover last night and after he'd gone I went into his room to fold away the put-me-up bed. First of all I was hit by the smell of pee, and the friend's bed was totally sodden with it. I get that anyone can have an accident. I also get that maybe he was really embarrassed. But if that were the case, why leave the bed in that state? Like I'd never know?

DS strips his own sheets and loads them in the w/machine weekly - it's just one job on a very short list of his "chores", and I would like to think that if he were on a sleepover and had an accident he would strip the bed. And for any doubters out there, it was definitely his friend who spent the night in the spare bed, not DS - they were still asleep in their respective beds when I had to retrieve my toddler DD from their room this morning before she climbed on top of them! In fact, I remember thinking at the time that DD must have wet her nappy because I could smell pee, but was surprised to find it dry.

OP posts:
Humphriescushion · 01/11/2015 20:00

Moral backbone, when you are thirteen and terrified! And especially terrified that his friend will find out and the repercussions at school! The lack of empathy is incredible.

MrsCampbellBlack · 01/11/2015 20:01

I would actually mention it to the parent - bedwetting can be a symptom of type on diabetes especially if it has just started happening.

Furiosa · 01/11/2015 20:01

Saddle how old is your DS?

MrsCampbellBlack · 01/11/2015 20:01

type one diabetes I meant.

Tarzanlovesgaby · 01/11/2015 20:02

yanbu
13 is plenty old enough to at least try to clean up after himself.
although I could picture a variation of the 'trainspotting' sheet szene

usual · 01/11/2015 20:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Sparklingbrook · 01/11/2015 20:02

If I was friend's parent and I fished a pair of soaking wet pjs out of his overnight bag I would ring you TBH. It could be that he's hidden them once home though. Sad

StubbleTurnips · 01/11/2015 20:04

I post on these threads occasionally as I suffered with wetting the bed until I was late teens, nothing physically wrong - emotional issues and shite parents.

I would have been mortified, when my parents caught me stripping a wet bed they would rub my nose in It (I am not saying you'd do this saddle) and get my sisters to tell my friends at school so I was hired oust bullied and stank of stale urine. I became adept at hiding and ignoring it.

You've no idea how it's being managed at home, so no idea on why he hid the issue. A pain for you I know, but it's much worse for him.

PaulAnkaTheDog · 01/11/2015 20:04

Poor soul was probably hoping that of you did notice you wouldn't mention it to anyone, especially your ds. Please don't act any different the next time you see him. I'm willing to bet that he's at home right now upset and worrying over it. Poor kid.

PaulAnkaTheDog · 01/11/2015 20:09

Also, for the people wondering how it could happen to a child of that age: stop being idiots! I'm 27 and one night last year I wet my bed. No medical reason. I have very vivid, like life dreams and I was on the toilet in my dream. Woke up very quickly to realise I had started to pee. Things happen.

SurlyCue · 01/11/2015 20:12

if only those teens could think through their actions, people would have such a different take on them!

Which actions?

Humphriescushion · 01/11/2015 20:13

Exactly and well said stubble! You are never going draw attention to it -ever.

He would have been really worried about staying over and any joy from it would have been clouded by the worry that this would happen.

His moral backbone and character is huge, highlighted by the fact that he put himself through this. worse things happen bringing up children so yabu.

Summeblaze · 01/11/2015 20:14

How cruel that the first thing you think of is how it's affected you. I would have felt beyond sorry for the poor lad and would probably go out of my way to invite him around again to show him it is nothing to be embarrassed about. I'm glad you haven't told your DS though.

SuburbanRhonda · 01/11/2015 20:16

Still I think at age 13 you can't expect that level of moral backbone that would cause a kid to tell you he had an accident and ask where the washing machine is

WTF is "moral backbone"? Hmm

jevoudrais · 01/11/2015 20:16

I would have felt very sad. He must be so mortified about it.

SauvignonBlanche · 01/11/2015 20:18

I'm sorry to hear that Stubble. Sad
I never said a word to my DS, who wet the bed up to age 14, as I stripped his bed everyday; I knew he couldn't help it.

SoDiana · 01/11/2015 20:21

How do you imagine the coversation going in your ideal world

helenahandbag · 01/11/2015 20:22

I randomly wet the bed one night when I was about 17. I was dreaming that I was peeing in the sea on holiday Blush

DP wet the bed (with me in it!) when he was 24, also due to a vivid dream.

These things happen.

donajimena · 01/11/2015 20:24

I'm 43 and last year I woke up having started to pee! Like a pp (see what I did there?) I dreamt I was in the WC.

Furiosa · 01/11/2015 20:26

I'm getting a feeling here but will sit on my hairy hands.

PuppyMonkey · 01/11/2015 20:27

As if he was going to strip the bed in front of his mate then trot up happily to you or the washing machine and say: "Here you are Mrs OP, I did this."Hmm

Bubbletree4 · 01/11/2015 20:31

Poor boy. Just wash the sheets and forget it. Can you not imagine how embarrassed he was? He probably just wanted to run away.

I had a sleepover guest wet the bed. It was a birthday sleepover and there were 4 kids. I quietly shoved the sheets in the machine.

PaulAnkaTheDog · 01/11/2015 20:33

So glad I'm not the only one who has peed thanks to a vivid dream!

SoDiana · 01/11/2015 20:34

First time dd went on a sleepover I rang mum to tell her.
She was like no problems

Fieryfighter · 01/11/2015 20:34

YABVU, the poor lad would have been mortified, terrified of being found out and wouldn't do anything to draw attention to it and probably hoped it would all go away the way kids do.

I know it's unpleasant for you but you'll soon forget it but I bet he remembers and dwells on it for a long long time