one born could be banned... is this unreasonable

[ghostspirit]

www.mirror.co.uk/tv/tv-news/call-one-born-every-minute-6717624#ICID=sharebar_facebook

i think it is. people can turn over is they dont like it. and i think it gives woman an insight of how things might be when they are in labour.

I hate OBEM simply because I don't want to watch anyone giving birth, but don't think it should be banned.

There is such pressure and competition on women these days judging from my FB to get the perfect birth. I hate posts/quotes/memes I see on FB stating that a woman only needed intervention because she had low expectations/lack of trust in her body etc.

I saw an "expert" state that every woman in labour who receives medical intervention has been assaulted. A tree hugging Katie Hopkins basically.

I would have loved it to have been around when I was expecting DS1. All I had access to was some pretty mawkish american stuff which always ended with the woman flat on the back with about a hundred relatives and their next door neighbours' cleaners' second cousins in the room with her shouting "PUSH!!!"

After DS1 (now almost 12) went through a phase of asking a lot of very particular questions about birth but not being able to take in the answers, I ended up putting it on for him!

Piper, I hardly think they're going to be interviewed for a job, 18 years on, and their potential boss say "Awww, I recognise you from the telly! You had no clothes on, mate!"

"I hate posts/quotes/memes I see on FB stating that a woman only needed intervention because she had low expectations/lack of trust in her body etc."]

Your facebook friends must be unusually stupid and ignorant. I've got loads of midwives and doulas on my facebook and I've never seen anyone post anything as nasty or as stupid as this.

mimi thankfully I have never met a real expert with these views; it seems to be a branch of what I would call radical birthers (which then extends into radical BFing/co-sleeping/unschooling etc) The type that think NHS midwives are the spawn of the devil and then think the NHS are satan because they don't want to fund and independent MW for them.

I'm slightly perplexed at the woman's assertion that it show only worst-case scenarios.

I don't watch it anymore, I don't think it's entertainment. The women seem passive, the MW are all eating cake and not worrying about consent for any procedure. Depressing really.

The problem here is that the woman in question is a birth coach who helps anxious women through having a baby.

They are a self selecting group. A group that may blame OBEM as its the most well known programme out there. I can imagine lots of women talking to her saying that programmes like OBEM scare them. However that doesn't mean that the programme itself is a bad thing. It does help and reassure a good number of women I'm sure - but would they be the women coming to see her? No they wouldn't.

Severe fear of birth has existed since women started giving birth. Not because there was a tv show that happened to show birth. Before tv was invented women were afraid because of the lack of information or because of the stories they heard from other women. Banning OBEM won't stop that.

Women have a range of different reactions to giving birth or the prospect of it. For some it is normal to be extremely anxious for a variety of reasons. For others they won't bat an eyelid.

The real issue is actually that the woman saying that OBEM should be banned really doesn't understand anxiety or where it comes from. Which is a worry given her job tbh.

Personally, I had a CS because of the extent of my fear of giving birth was so severe. OBEM was nothing to do with it. It was because of a whole pile of other things that were underlying. I wouldn't watch OBEM for a long time for a variety of reasons, but really when I break it down, it wasn't because the programme itself scared me. Its because it reminded me of the underlying fears that I had that I didn't want to confront and face up to.

I have watched OBEM including when I was pregnant once I'd dealt with my fears or had them under control. It was interesting I suppose, but it didn't particularly scare me, as I couldn't get that emotionally invested in the women tbh. No more than if I were watching a documentary about something else.

So yeah, in response to this woman's call to have OBEM, I do have to ask cause or effect. What is she actually reporting here? Does she really understand what her clients are saying? I personally think she may be in great danger of taking it at face value and not really examining the issue below the surface.

I wanted to watch it but it gave me too many sad feelings about my secondary infertility. I don't want it banned though!

Oh please! I watched this when I was pregnant and it didn't scare me! f anything it gives a false impression and ONE perspective of childbirth - you rarely see an emergency on there and all the other things you have no idea about, manual removals, PPH, failed assisted deliveries then rushed for EMCS! SOME women have it that way but ALL women. You are given false hopes. I thought I would be fine because I thought OBEM was actually realistic and no one in my family had a shit time! I thought midwives would help... Ha!

It's when you end up having a traumatic birth and everything you AREN'T told when you're pregnant ends up happening that you get scared and fucked up! Suffering with PTSD that even hearing the noses of this programme make your stomach churn, having nightmares about what was done to you, crying in the bath because nothing is going to make it right... And all you get is "STFU, you have a healthy baby, be happy, you ungrateful b*tch!"

I WISH my birth was like one on One Born... to be honest!

I've watched it now and again - when I get the chance and DC's are in bed.
I think it's very educational though perhaps they could show more natural births. DD was born in a water pool in hospital so there are interesting options.

but not* ALL women are that lucky!

I watched it when I was pregnant and it was actually pretty useful for me. My mother is deceased, and I have no one else who I could ask about labour (and I knew I would be giving birth alone). It gave me some information about some of the less pleasant aspects of labour rather than the pretty Hollywood version. I haven't watched it since having my son as I don't really have any interest since my own labour is over and done with.

But surely if a woman is scared watching it,then she can always exercise her right to just change the channel?

I love it and found it very informative and strangely reassuring.
If you don't want to watch it, don't.

Yankee what is a radical breast feeder?

I love it and am completely addicted to it. Not only that but both DH and I found it very helpful when I was rushed to theatre with DS (DC3, first two births were straightforward). Having seen it happen on OBEM made it much easier to process what was happening. Despite his dramatic birth I had no emotional trauma and I do think OBEM helped (plus all the lovely MW and theatre staff and obstetricians who came and chatted to me after the birth, I felt like a celebrity!).

OhMakeMeOver

Personally I cannot understand why anyone would want to either broadcast their labour or watch someone else's but each to their own.

I can't see why it would need to be banned and doubt it would be.

I do think it good thing for children who asks how do babies come out of the woman tummy. It's a gentle way to show them.

I don't watch, it gives me the rage to see everyone flat on their back.

But yes yes to those saying why all the mocking of women screaming at 2 cm - in my third labour I was begging for an epidural not long after that, but it turns out that due to two previous cs, excess scar tissue and endometriosis every contraction was ripping my bladder and other internal bits. Please, come and mock me for screaming. No one knows what anyone else is feeling or what their pain thresholds are so don't presume to tell anyone how they should act in labour.

Rant over.

Salem my idea of a radical breast feeder is one that smugly waxes lyrical about how easy it is for them and therefore anyone who finds it hard is a failure. Children who are FF are being poisoned and their IQ and psychological well being is at detriment. They make ridiculous claims without any imperical evidence at how damaged children who have not been BF are.

Btw I am pro bf/co sleeping etc for my own children. I don't care how others choose to do with their children though.

Momsnest, I have never understood why anyone wants to have their labour and delivery blasted all over our TV screens. It isn't something I would personally have consented to.

I don't mind watching others who have consented to it though.

Banning it would be extreme but I cannot understand it's appeal. I watched about 5mins of it once and found it unbearable. I don't want to be reminded of the pain of labour nor watch anyone else in pain.

I have often heard people talking about it at toddler groups etc, mostly bitching about some poor women being noisy or irritating. Can't understand why people watch it, can't understand why people go on it but plenty do so each to their own.

kinkytoes Thank you.
I realise that must have sounded like a rant!
I don't get why ANY pregnant woman wouldn't want to know everything that's likely to happen. You don't always end up being able to hold your baby straight away and have that instant rush and cuddle. Sometimes you're just too relieved baby is okay yet shocked at what happened at the same time. Nobody tells you that you can walk away from it feeling traumatised because you thought your baby wasn't alive.

Although I don't think it's that bad for banning it, what I don't like about it is when people sit at home and say things like "Ugh, bloody hell, that's disgusting" or "God, noisy bitch". Or men that sit there and laugh about the women in pain or having unpleasant intervention. There are so many risks during childbirth that get brushed over and having kids is taken for granted.