hurt on behalf of my niece re using same name

[cansantabuildsnowmen]

My cousin had a baby last week on my nieces birthday. They named her a different name to my niece but both will go by the same short version. Think Isabel and Belinda both going by Bel. Both children are unlikely to ever meet, we aren't close to cousins but we are a tiny family. There are now 15 of us total so whilst they wont grow up together its very obvious they have the same name. Cousin has made it clear the new baby will be called by the short name.

What is upsetting us is my niece isn't biologically my brothers nor are my brother and nieces mum married however they've been together 8 years and my niece was 3 when they got together. In that time my auntie has had 4 grandchildren and we've always sent birthday cards, bought Christmas presents for the kids and my niece has had nothing from my auntie or that side of the family. It makes me wonder if they would have used this name if my niece was biologically my brothers. Aibu to be upset over all this

I can't quite get my heart around how everyone of related.
But yes yabu.

I have a first cousin with a different name, same short version. It drove us nuts as kids but I think we're over it now.

I have 9 close blood relations called Steven. It's fine no confusion.

My cousin has a son with the same name as my ds1 & another cousin's grandson has the same name as ds2. I can't get worked up about it at all. We also have a lot of shared middle names or one person's name is another one's middle name. So what?

Your brothers girlfriend has a child and your cousin has used a different full name but same version for her baby. Is that right?

Can't see the problem

Absolutely no idea what the issue is.

You should try being part of a Greek family with 15 Giorgos and 15 Giannis cousins!

So your nasty aunty has ignored your little DN for the whole of her life.

Now you feel that choosing the same for Dcousin's baby is another snub - treating little DN as if she doesn't exist or count.

Well I would say the family of 15 isn't really a family of 15 - it is them and your side. And I would see less of them if they don't buy her presents etc, that is not really acceptable.

Why do you fall over yourself to be considerate to their DCs when they ignore those on your side.
Distance yourself. People don't choose their families they get landed with them, there is no rule that that means you must be close to them.