Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be bored of the open season on "posh" accents?

123 replies

Asteria36 · 21/10/2015 17:32

I am unbelievably bored of people treating my "posh" accent as a totally acceptable object of ridicule. Is this just me, or do other people find that in groups with mixed accents they feel honed in on and ridiculed for the way they speak? I wouldn't dream of singling out and poking fun at someone for the way that they talk, but in the past when I have suggested that perhaps, like most people, I can't help the way I speak I have been met with hostility.
One particular acquaintance of ours has decided that it is perfectly acceptable to minimise comments I make in conversation by saying "rah rah rah" and accusing me being a snob - but in my opinion she is actually the one with the problem, not me. I don't care what you sound like, just don't behave like a cockwomble.

OP posts:
wizzywig · 21/10/2015 17:33

Im sure liverpudlians and brummies also get fed up with it

hiddenhome2 · 21/10/2015 17:35

Yes, it's horrible Sad

Ds2 speaks nicely and is being bullied because of it. He's ridiculed and called "weird" and "posh". We're not posh, but we don't have accents.

If he was black or gay or Chinese it wouldn't be tolerated Sad

Optimist1 · 21/10/2015 17:36

Tell them it's wiser to judge others on what they say, not on how it's said.

Optimist1 · 21/10/2015 17:36

Tell them it's wiser to judge others on what they say, not on how it's said.

Shutthatdoor · 21/10/2015 17:36

It is wrong to pick on anybody because of their accent.

You are right. It is your 'friend' with the problem not you.

Original poster
Asteria36 · 21/10/2015 17:38

I don't doubt it! But do other people (whatever their accent) get constantly ribbed for being the token toff/brummie/Liverpudlian/etc? I have never experienced it before so genuinely don't know if this is something that happens elsewhere? DH and I went out for dinner with new school friends and they all down the evening banging on about me being posh.

OP posts:
Dapplegrey1 · 21/10/2015 17:39

That's horrible and unnecessary - maybe dump the friend, op.

Original poster
Asteria36 · 21/10/2015 17:39

*spent the evening

OP posts:
MyFavouriteClintonisGeorge · 21/10/2015 17:43

Yes. I speak RP, had this all through school and university. I ignored it, for the most part. If you decide to say something you could tell her that her reaction says a lot more about her than it says about you.

However, as for: If he was black or gay or Chinese it wouldn't be tolerated
Get real. It is tolerated, and more, by very many people. I am FED UP with people behaving as though we are getting the kid glove treatment while anyone else suffering discrimination is left to suffer. It is not true. it makes everything worse. I'm black and speak RP, I can tell you now it was not easy.

annandale · 21/10/2015 17:43

God they sound dull.

Tbh I still think other accents get more stereotyping than you realise but that doesn't make it ok that it happens to you. You could try challenging them a bit more, or maybe just decide that these friends aren't worth the effort.

Dapplegrey1 · 21/10/2015 17:44

If you see these people again and they start on about your being 'posh' (God, I hate that word) maybe say to them "do you mean to be so hurtful?".

pandarific · 21/10/2015 17:44

I get this - it never stops being shit. A way that tends to wrong-foot people doing it is an eyebrow raise and a 'The chip's on your shoulder'. Because it is.

More sensitively, I think people who often come out with this sort of stuff have been picked on for being 'common' (also vile) so it's a bit of a self-defense mechanism. You could try having an open conversation about class with them? They must have thoughts on passing remark on class as a kind of bullying.

Or maybe they're an insensitive cockwomble and it will wash right off.

GenerationX2 · 21/10/2015 17:54

Ds2 speaks nicely
Hmm

so everyone else's accent it NOT nice - maybe this is part of the problem.........

GreatFuckability · 21/10/2015 17:58

We're not posh, but we don't have accents.

you do have accents, everyone has an accent.

Original poster
Asteria36 · 21/10/2015 17:58

It isn't a matter of nicely or not generationx2 - just different!

OP posts:
MissMarpleCat · 21/10/2015 17:59

It's rude. Locals take the piss out of my estuary accent (Ilford) and I've been called a chav (I can assure you I am not Grin), charming.

wasonthelist · 21/10/2015 18:00

You can't be that posh if you say "bored of". YANBU though - if people shouldn't ridicule my accent, they shouldn't ridicule yours.

SacredHeart · 21/10/2015 18:03

I get this all day at uni mocking, parroting etc. It's annoying as these people are so proud of where they come from (which we all should be) but I can't say boo or I get my head jumped up and down on. Same with the other "toffs\posh twats".

It's so depressing and and alienating - are they really surprised that at a very old, highly respected uni a few "plum-mouthed" student from MC backgrounds are studying?

JimmyGreavesMoustache · 21/10/2015 18:06

it happens to lots of us
on MN, my accent (Estuary), is generally mocked as lazy, common and vulgar

I live a long way from where I grew up, and pisstakers at work (and there have been many) get short shrift.

Palomb · 21/10/2015 18:07

I get this all the time at work because I say bath, grass, task, ask, laugh etx differently.. Obviously
My way is the right way and they're all jealous I can speak proper.

I actually find it quite entertaining.

BertrandRussell · 21/10/2015 18:11

I suspect you might find having a strong regional accent significantly worse!

And did someone actually say that their child "speaks nicely"? As opposed to what? Grin

DS gets the occasional comment about his accent. Favourite so far- someone on the other team at a football match a couple of weeks ago "Oi, Number 5! Fuck off back to your mansion!" Grin

GenerationX2 · 21/10/2015 18:12

It isn't a matter of nicely or not generationx2 - just different!

that was my exact point to hiddenhome2 Asteria36

Original poster
Asteria36 · 21/10/2015 18:15

I used to find it entertaining Palomb, however that was when the mocking was more of the affectionate between friends nature. This new "friend" has a definite barb to her comments and tends to rally support from others. Our children and husbands get on incredibly well, so I feel a little uncomfortable about biting back.

OP posts:
wasonthelist · 21/10/2015 18:16

Everyone has a regional accent. RP originates from Northamptonshire.

GreatFuckability · 21/10/2015 18:19

i've been the token welsh person very often and have often been ridiculed for my accent. people just latch on to whatever is 'different'. if shes being a bitch, tell her so. should shut her up for a bit