Will try not to make this too long. I am probably BU, this all happened a while ago but I am fairly new to MN!
My Dp and moved into a block of flats just over a year ago, when I was pregnant. An older lady (looks to be in her 60's) owns the flat next door. We rent, not sure if this matters but I do detect a slight snobby attitude on her part because of this, I may be wrong.
We didn't speak to her much at the start, apart from the basic pleasantries- hello, how are you? Etc. It became clear that she think she is some kind of "boss" of the flats. She is the only person to have a key to the utility cupboard, she holds loud "meetings" in the hallway, and is generally a bit of a busy body when it comes to people in the flats' business.
Anyway, like I said, we got on fine to begin with.
Then I had my ds in March. I had an EMCS and was feeling very down when we got home from hospital, very sore, exhausted, all the usual complaints!
One night I decided to have a cheeky fag outside our bedroom window (her window
Looks onto ours). I finished my (heavenly) smoke and stubbed it out and tried to ping it into the open bin that sits outside the flats. I missed, and (selfishly, I know), just left it there and came back inside.
I came back in to my screaming newborn, and my dp trying to calm him down. Next thing there was a loud knock at the door. This was about 9.30 pm so we had no
Idea who would be knocking at this time. My dp answered it, baby in his
arms, and there stood NDN. She proceeded to tell him that she had seen me leaving a cigarette doubt outside and started ranting.
My dp calmly asked if she would mind coming back in the morning as we were trying to deal with our son. But no, she continued ranting and raving, so my dp closed the door in her face. He was really angry by this point (he was even more exhausted than me by this point, balancing work and a new baby).
I started getting upset because I KNOW I was in the wrong. I felt
Embarrassed and nervous, so decided to go next door and apologised.
When she opened the door I said sorry so many times and said I knew I was wrong to leave the cigarette there and that I would go out and pick it up (which I did) and I explained that I am not normally so thoughtless but my brain was a bit frazzled and so was my dp's. I was crying by this point and she gave me a hug and told me not to worry we all make mistakes and that we would draw a line under it. I felt so relieved that we had sorted this issue and headed home to tell my dp all was ok.
Then, the next day, leaving our flat to go for a walk, this same
Neighbour launched a verbal
Attack on myself and my partner, while we were pushing our son in his pram. Started shouting that we had left more mess outside (we hadn't) and that she was phoning the factors and going to get us evicted. I told her no sorry that must be somebody elses mess, I picked up that cigarette last night, but she continued to shout at us in front of other neighbours.
I started getting upset again so my dp intervened and she told him "shut up, I don't want to talk to you!" So he told her "fine go fuck yourself you old cow". I was angry at him for saying this, but I was even more angry that she had agreed to forgive and forget the first incident, then brought it all up on our doorstep the next day, in
front of people. I had even offered to do her shopping for her
If she needed me to one day but it seems she has decided that we are not nice people. We get on with everybody else in the building.
Sorry I know this is long, and I know
I was in the wrong to begin with, but I don't think it warranted her behaviour. I also know my dp shouldn't have swore at her but like I said, we were both so sleep deprived at the time.