Accidentally said someone wife and daughter didn't look like models

[eedon]

I fully accept I might of been very rude, judging this in words when it was just a flipant remark that I said without thinking.

Just at work, I needed to get some more paper. Accidentally knocked over someones family photo. It was clearly one of those white background studio photos that aren't my cup of tea but anyway I picked it back up and said "they almost look like the people that come free with the frame". He gave me funny look and said nothing, so I just replied " if only they were a bit more model-ly I'd be fooled". He gave an even stranger look and just said thanks.

Should I apologise to him? He must know I was just being friendly? Was this offensive?

I once said to my SIL that she reminded me of a certain celebrity, but not as good looking, while smiling sweetly at her.

She looked stunned and said "That's not very nice".

It was only then I realised I had put it the wrong way round and that of course I meant she was more beautiful than this lady. But despite all my blustering, hole-digging and trying to excuse what I'd said, I'm sure she still thinks I was being mean

I wouldn't have been offended like that and can't really imagine that anyone would be stewing away thinking of what a bitch you are if you said that to them

A bit odd, yes. Grudge worthy resentment, no.

(Btw, I also think those weird studio photo shoots are hideous)

Accidentally knocked over someones family photo. It was clearly one of those white background studio photos that aren't my cup of tea but anyway I picked it back up and said "they almost look like the people that come free with the frame". He gave me funny look and said nothing, so I just replied " if only they were a bit more model-ly I'd be fooled". He gave an even stranger look and just said thanks.

Are you Alan Partridge?

badlad

Certainly sounds like
"Anyhow it's now 7 am ...Ruddy hell its Soft cell"
Should be the next line

I was given a picture frame once, as a gift. I thought it a bit odd that my friend had given me a picture of a dreamy looking victorian woman but I put it on my mantelpiece anyway. She finally plucked up the courage to tell me I was meant to put my own picture in it.

The only mistake you've made is putting it out for discussion with the AIBU Vipers.

Nothing you said sounds nasty and I should imagine it's better hearing it than reading it anyway.

I wouldn't give it any more thought TBH....

If someone said 'They look like the people who come in the frame' to me, and they clearly weren't the kind who are regularly nasty, I'd think it was meant to be a rather clumsy compliment.

It's the 'If only they were more modelly' bit that would make me go .

But since you're posting this on AIBU, you're clearly not the insensitive type who goes blundering around like this all the time. We all say the wrong thing sometimes. I think most people overlook a foot-in-mouth moment in a genuinely nice person. Not so much in someone who is constantly bitching.

Haha BadLad i agree, OP you're Alan Partridge!! Ah-haaaaaaaa

oops.

nonetheless; the people that 'come with the frame' are usually a happy, smiling, cheerful looking bunch.

being told you look like a catwalk model (sick-thin, miserable, ridiculously dressed) would be an insult in my book.

I actually get what you were trying to say. A) it is a nice photo ie nice enough to be the standard picture sold with the frame, which would hardly be a bunch of fugly twats would it and b) They weren't doing model-y poses.

I don't think you were trying to be offensive and I wouldn't take it that way, however I can see how someone would misinterpet it

Yeah, rude and stupid.

I am going to be magnanimous, OP, and suggest that perhaps you merely lack emotional intelligence.

I think it was an OK comment. 99% of people don't look model'y - I would have know what you meant and i wouldn't have minded at all.

However, it would have been best not to comment at all.

Next time it will just be "sorry" and "lovely"

When I said modely I did mean not commercial (cheesey) models. Very different type of model for commercial as there is for High fashion. This was going through my head.

Oh Op you are so channelling Alan Partridge

Shame work colleague isn't a mind reader.

Yeah, you have to learn when to shut up and stop explaining.

I would have take your first comment as a compliment and laughed at your second comment as the kind of thing I say which comes out wrong.

Bloody hell OP don't worry, the guy sounds a bit miserable to be honest for giving you a "look" over an honest accident

I wouldn't say anything about it not being meant the way it sounded, as his obvious response would be "how was it meant then?" and you would end up digging an even bigger hole for yourself.

Think about how either of your comments could be meant. Is there one which is not offensive?

I would email the colleague 'just wanted to clear the air. so sorry for being confusing earlier. I was stressed out about getting x printed and when I knocked over your photo I got my words tied up in knots. I was trying to say that you have a very lovely family and I've been worrying ever since that I offended you.'