Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be unhappy with this school trip?

487 replies

IWannaHoldYourHand · 30/09/2015 22:29

Ds2 is in reception and has come home with a letter advising us of a school trip to a farm in December. The cost is a reasonable amount for the farm that will be visited, however the main focus of the visit is having lunch with Santa, and receiving a gift.

It is the visiting Santa that I feel odd about. I see this as a very family based event, and not something I would expect to do with anybody else, or without his sibling. We wouldn't even refer to him as Santa at home, and it just feels strange to me.

I have spoken to the head who informed me that this will be backing up their learning for that term, and advised that I have the option of attending, but it still feels wrong to me. So is this normal, do schools regularly take a trip to visit Father Christmas?

OP posts:
CookieMonsterIsOnADiet · 01/10/2015 07:25

At least the staff room would have had plenty to talk about Grin

Who would want to be a teacher when parents take offence and complain over a trip designed to give pleasure to the children.

All local schools have a visit from Santa, most have him at the christmas fair and some make visits to grottos. Most children refer to him as Santa so there's no way your eldest or youngest won't have ever heard him called that before.

Just don't send your child if you disagree, let the others go and enjoy it.

ilovesooty · 01/10/2015 07:25

I'm with those who think the head probably had better things to do that day than meet with you to discuss this utterly unimportant issue. Still as others said I suppose it might have given them a laugh in the staff room.

Sapele · 01/10/2015 07:25

Plus, PLUS I don't get how this is 'educational'. Christmas is a personal, special and magical thing for children and school should not cross that line.

It would be like school making their birthday cake or giving them money from the tooth fairy.

If they can't come up with something more properly educational than a jolly trip to see Santa then I find that a bit odd.

Spartans · 01/10/2015 07:27

Hype would be afraid it would put your child off Santa forever?

Surely at 4/5 your child has already had experience of Santa. What makes you think when you pick one its going to be a 'nice one'. Do you go through first? To make sure he is friendly enough?

Only1scoop · 01/10/2015 07:29

The precious about Santa brigade had better watch ....out we encountered about 5 last year when doing various tasks....

'Easy to avoid' Grinnot the one in Tesco he kept randomly appearing with a menacing 'ho ho ho'

Blimey.... there are some super selective Santa sensitive screeners about.

MsJamieFraser · 01/10/2015 07:31

all very normal, god wait till you get the letter about the panto! Wink

TheStripyGruffalo · 01/10/2015 07:31

It sounds like a lovely trip. DD and DS both got to go and see Santa with school and they'd also go and see a christmas themed play. It was far cheaper than me taking them and they loved it.

PenelopePitstops · 01/10/2015 07:32

Schools are often blamed for not being a top up to inadequate parents, you can't have it both ways.

Mehitabel6 · 01/10/2015 07:33

I think that a lot of teachers go in for it because they want to make a difference for children with inadequate parents. Certainly as a teacher I would love to do a visit to FC with reception class. Quite happy to go as a volunteer!

ilovesooty · 01/10/2015 07:34

Sapele
You really vet the Santas in advance?

And as for your perception of schools not crossing that line - you do realise that not every child has a warm and loving Christmas family experience with rigorous vetting at home? Still as long as your child has the privileges sod the others?

Spartans · 01/10/2015 07:34

My child's birthday isn't a national holiday, neither was it a holiday when he lost his first tooth. So it's not the same.

Mehitabel6 · 01/10/2015 07:39

If you are very precious about FC and want to personally vet them and control where you see him I would suggest that you home educate and don't leave your house after the second half of November until New Year. Also keep the TV off and don't take any newspapers or magazines.

Luckily children are far more adaptable than some adults on here.

HearTheThunderRoar · 01/10/2015 07:39

But what about those families who cannot afford to go to these magical places. I haven't been for a good few years but it was quite costly back then, especially if you bought photos etc. Then those children miss out, whats wrong with a 'jolly' at the end of a hard year as a treat??

DisappointedOne · 01/10/2015 07:41

I'm an atheist myself but we touch on the Christmas story in Reception which I teach as, 'Christians believe...' This is the same philosophy I use to teach Divali (Hindus believe) or Hanukkah (Jews believe). I'd rather religion didn't exist but even I recognise the value of teaching children about it as a means of developing their understanding of (1) the world and (2) other people and communities (both on the EYFS curriculum). So long as Christmas is not taught as, 'we believe,' I don't have a problem with it.

This is absolutely how I want my child to learn about religion. Sadly, not everyone does it this way (DD's reception teacher - non-faith school - is Christian and attempts to impose her views as fact at times. This we deal with firmly but gently at home and we're not making a fuss about it at the moment.)

Mehitabel6 · 01/10/2015 07:41

4/5yr olds are supposed to work hard all term HearTheThunder - schools and learning are not supposed to be fun! Heaven forbid that teachers should plan anything as a treat!

ilovesooty · 01/10/2015 07:42

Agreed Mehitabel

With the added bonus of not having to put up with your precious little snowflake having to associate with less privileged children.

hairbrushbedhair · 01/10/2015 07:44

It would be like school making their birthday cake or giving them money from the tooth fairy.*

My sons nursery did him a cake for his birthday, he loved it and so did I, I thought it was really kind and special for him to have a "birthday" with his nursery pals.

The Easter bunny went to his nursery too and gave him an Easter egg and did an Easter egg hunt. Again I thought it was really kind and fun.

I still successfully gave him a birthday and celebrated Easter at home... Without him being at all confused by any of it.

He's not old enough for the tooth fairy but I would be delighted if school wanted to GIVE money away to us.

littleducks · 01/10/2015 07:45

We don't celebrate xmas so I wood be really surprised if our school did something like this. People get really upset if other children reveal that Santa isn't real to their kids so it wouldnt be like a visitor coming in for Divali or Hanukkah or something. I think it would be asking for trouble.

For the most part our school ignores the santa thing (xmas concert seems to take up every spare minute after half term). We had one supply teacher once who asked the year ones to put up their hands if they thought Santa was/want real (I have no idea what she was thinking prob used to a less diverse school). About half the class said he wasn't and she then said he was. Lots of parents complained and she hasn't been back for supply.

MagicalMrsMistoffelees · 01/10/2015 07:45

Look, Christmas isn't just 'personal'. It's a festival that is celebrated by both Christians (the religious bit) and many others (the FC, presents, time with family, food bit). Learning about festivals is part of the EYFS curriculum. Christmas is a pretty easy one for Reception chn to learn about like Divali and the Chinese New Year. Other festivals are slightly less accessible for 4 and 5 year olds to get their heads around!

Imagine if schools completely ignored Christmas? Do you have any idea how excited the chn are from 1 December onwards? It's their one topic of conversation! I taught a child whose family were JWs - she was still allowed to join in everything we did rather than make her feel excluded. As I said before, I always think carefully about the words I use when teaching eg, 'Christians believe' or 'many people celebrate by'.

Now this trip: 'Animals' is a very common topic in Reception. This class happens to be doing it in Autumn 2. They're going to the farm. FC happens to be there, an added excitement for the chn's first school trip. So what?! To be upset about that, to talk to the headtwacher is ridiculous, well all I can say is how on earth will you cope with a real problem at school such as losing a jumper or when another child accidentally picks up your child's junk modelling creation?!

SirChenjin · 01/10/2015 07:46

Yabu - honestly, if this is the thing that's causing you concern then you need to find a job or a hobby that will give you far less time to fret over such utter, utter trivia.

BoboChic · 01/10/2015 07:47

There is nothing "magical" about a paid-for Santa's grotto and photos Hmm. It's unpleasant commercial nonsense that no child needs.

Sapele · 01/10/2015 07:49

The truth is that after a couple of experiences with 'santa' I would hesitate to trust any of them.

Debenhams was crap, Wyevale was also crap. Just as someone said, a rather drunk sounding old git in a costume who had no idea what to do to make a reticent child feel comfortable.

I think the damage has been done here, and I wouldn't want to put dc3 through it too.

In other words yes, I would want to vet the santa and if the ones we have encountered have been anything to go by, it's not an experience I can say that my children would enjoy.

Of course it isn't about 'sod the rest'. Maybe some kids would love it. Mine would be suspicious I think.

BoboChic · 01/10/2015 07:50

Teachers shouldn't be wanting to make a difference to DC with inadequate parents. They should be wanting to teach them.

Sapele · 01/10/2015 07:50

Plus what Bobochic said. In spades.

EastMidsMummy · 01/10/2015 07:51

Yes, children should receive only a piece of coal and a satsuma and spend the weeks before Christmas practising their times tables.

Swipe left for the next trending thread