Am I being PFB regarding pre-school situation?

[Wishful80smontage]

Happy to be supported or told I'm completely overreacting here - I just need some detached responses please.
My dd is 2.5. She started at 2 preschools which I took her out of- first one- wasn't happy with environment- very small portacabin- she was youngest by far and outside area not good
Second one- inside was fine but outdoor area unsafe and not completely secure.
Visited 3 more- ruled one out as no outdoor space, another as the outdoor space was was in a back garden and didn't seem safe.
Leaves me one option locally everything fine regarding outdoor space- very secure and safe only issue is the toilets are down a corridor so children when toilet trained taje themselves off to the loo- Im worried this could be a potential accident hotspot- drowning risk, slipping on water etc
My dh thinks I'm utterly ridiculous he thinks I need to just pick one and get her settled as we have dc2 on way shortly.
I want her to be able to go preschool- she would love it but I'm unhappy with my only option- would you be concerned re:toilet situation or am I massively overthinking this?
Thanks

It might all feel a bit easier once your dd is more if a typical preschool age too, nearer 3, there's quite a lot of difference between 2 and 3/4 year olds.

OP, the sink scenario will probably turn up in the next Omen film if they ever make another sequel.

Yes you do sound PFB but I would have felt the same when my DD was 2.5. You could keep her home for longer? You will probably feel very differently about all the 'risks' in 6 -12 months time. Also, it might be easier to have 2 kids at home for a while rather than rushing to get your eldest to preschool and back when you have a newborn.

My dc's Preschool has the toilet down a hallway. Not for one moment have I thought they might fall in a sink!

The toilet trained ones do take themselves off to the toilet but the staff keep an eye on them. Yabu, I'm with your dh on this!

Of course PFB as you know. Can you revisit the other nurseries with a less anxious friend or your dh and see if the "risks" you spotted in their outdoor areas fall into the same category as drowning in a toilet? You might have 2 or 3 options after all.

This is sincerely meant - have you had post-natal depression, by any chance? Extreme anxiety about the child's welfare is a really common symptom, and it can linger even after the depression has lifted, I think.

Preschools are very safe environments. Not only are they inspected with that in mind, the owners know any serious accidents, far less a death, and they would have no business left at all. It is honestly a very tightly run ship nowadays from a safety perspective. And besides, part of growing up is the slowly incremental learning to manage risk - it's how we all get to maturity in one, albeit bruised, piece!

Going to the toilet alone is totally normal at this age - pre-schools do it to encourage independence ready for school. I agree with your DM that I imagine the staff take the children if they struggle by themselves - why not ask?

I know that it's important to find a pre-school to suit your child, but the fact that of 5 pre-schools none suit suggests in itself that you are being pfb - sorry. Do you really need her to go to pre-school now, sounds like you would be better waiting until she wasolder (For you, not her)

I've recently been on a first aid course and learnt that the most common place for toddlers to drown is a toilet.

Bollocks. Most under 4s drown in home swimming pools as opposed to public ones.

And bath tubs. Those are rare at nurseries.

Oh op I'm so sorry but this thread has made me laugh so much.
Cat is looking at me all funny because I started howling at the thought of murderous serial killer 2 year olds

I have just checked. It is baths and ponds that are dangerous for young children in England.

The most common drowning place for young children in the UK is not the toilet. Think about the logistics of that. It's baths and ponds.

Home pools are dangerous, but since they are rare in the UK don't feature highly as a risk (simply because not many chidren come across one)

How big are everyone's toilet bowls if the average toddler can jam their head in far enough to drown?
I've heard plenty of tales of daft stuff toddlers have done, but I've yet to hear of one stuck head first in a toilet bowl. Mind you they do say psychopaths are intelligent, so maybe all these murderous toddlers are building super size toilet bowls with a trail of haribo kale to lure their victims to their fate.

I did think it improbable, but it was stated on the Red Cross course I went on.

Then I worry what else they told you!

Are you sure they weren't saying it was possible to drown in very shallow water

I've just googled, all I can find is phrases saying babies can drown in buckets, toilets etc. There are a couple of cases of babies drowning in toilets which appear to be domestic ones. Although tbh given the size difference I would guess a baby falling head first in the toilet would be likely to have banged their head etc getting in there. Hard to say as the in depth article is the mail, which in typical style is more interested in trying to imply there was no autopsy and a quick burial because he was Jewish. Can't find anything linking the Red Cross and toddlers most commonly drowning in toilets.

OP bless you for taking it on the chin

You are totally pfb, DD will be fine. Accidents will always happen, because small children are always exploring and pushing themselves and their environment, but severe ones like previous posters DD are thankfully rare, although awful when they do happen.

Staff to child ratio is quite high, your child will have a key worker who won't let them be alone unnoticed for too long (at least that's what it's like in my dd's preschool) so hopefully they will notice that psychopathic toddler before they go on a killing spree

I've never heard of a toddler holding another toddler under water. If such a crazy dangerous toddler exists, they would have asked him to permanently leave (being unable to garrentee anyone's safety) or have constant supervision

Are these toddlers police checked?

I'm thinking back to my first starting nursery, 16 years ago and I would have been a bit concerned about the bathroom issue. I remember how it felt with your first. Can you chat about your concerns to the director? You know your dc better than us, are you worried about how they will manage going to the bathroom alone? Your post is funny, but was something I would have done.