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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to ask how your child's first day at nursery was?

118 replies

Twinklestar2 · 27/09/2015 22:57

I'm returning to work in the next couple of weeks so my son goes starts nursery tomorrow, 8am-6pm! Gosh it feels like a long day and i'm so worried he won't sleep as he's not one to sleep outside the house, he likes his own cot.

How was your child's first day at nursery? Please reassure me! he's 13 months.

OP posts:
Teladi · 28/09/2015 14:05

sproketmx, I think it's great that you're raising your kids in a family tradition and that you have such great support. I do hope though that you raise your kids to be a bit more open minded than you are coming across on here, as they might choose to leave your little village and go and have experiences elsewhere, with people who come from different backgrounds to you. I'm still aghast that you came onto a thread where the OP was feeling a bit wobbly about putting her LO into nursery and said you would be suicidal if you had to do it. It just wasn't very kind. Not all families are the same.

Fugghetaboutit · 28/09/2015 14:07

The first day was good. The second day however...

Thelushinthepub · 28/09/2015 14:09

Said she'd be suicidal then it turned out she had no idea what nursery was Hmm bit of a wind up merchant if you ask me

hazeyjane · 28/09/2015 14:09

That is lovely sproke, but I guess you have a tv, read books, look at newspapers - you do know that not everywhere in the world is like your village, and not everyone has the same sort of life as you - hence why I say that you are being a bit disingenuous.

WhatstheT · 28/09/2015 14:13

bit of a wind up merchant if you ask me I thought that so did a search... just braggy and opinionated it would seem...

Thelushinthepub · 28/09/2015 14:18

We really do live in a different world
Then because I'm not used to people bragging that they have no money, "ex" baby daddies and crap jobs Confused

Joking not joking

sproketmx · 28/09/2015 14:20

I came on to say mine were all ok, biggest problem I had were my twinnies fighting but I was totally Shock when I read 13 months. Genuinely shocked because it's not something I thought happened to actual real people. Yes I have a tv but as I said before I thought these private nurseries were for older kids who's mum needed them to go full days at nursery rather than half days. I also explained I had no idea that nurseries took them so young. And also... it doesn't tend to come up on the extreme sports channel or Disney xd and there's never usually anything else on in my house.

jorahmormont · 28/09/2015 14:24

Good for you, sproket. Nice how you assume we all have the same family set-up as you.

When I got pregnant at 19, at the start of my second year of uni, my parents had no room for me to move back into their house in a rural, back-of-beyond place full of racists and judgmental idiots, with no career prospects and very few jobs, and I couldn't stay up in my uni town without student finance, so I had to just push through. I had DD on the last day of my second year, she went straight into nursery on the first day of my third year, just under 5 months old. She's flourished there and is bright, sociable and developmentally ahead, our bond is fantastic, I've finished my third year and graduate in October with a first class honours degree, OH is a year away from graduating and we both have plans to get Masters, PGCEs and become teachers. The only way we've been able to do that is by putting DD in nursery, and yet it means her future prospects are a lot better, and she'll live a lot more comfortably once we're both working as teachers.

Don't pity mums who put their babies in nursery. It was the best decision we ever made, and I've not regretted it for a second. I wonder how you'll react if your kids move away from you when they grow up and are a bit more open minded?

sproketmx · 28/09/2015 14:27

I do indeed. There are 3 fathers to my kids. I'm skint and always have been and I Fucking hate getting up at a Rediculous time on a Sunday to go to work. BUT I have a fantastic hubby, amazing kids and friends who never let me down. Family means the world to me. Who wouldn't brag about that. I fucked up and married the wrong guy in my teens, there's folk on here who married the wrong one much older and wiser than I did. We had three kids, we split, I had a fling and got pregnant, I rekindled an old high school romance, married him and had a family. I've fucked up but I do my best. As I said before I didn't tin thus happened to real actual people

Jackiebrambles · 28/09/2015 14:27

My son went at 13 months op. I won't lie th first week was tough - he was so tired as they only did one nap when he was more used to two.

He cried at drop off for the first few days (and I then cried leaving!) but I called later and he was absolutely fine.
He also didn't eat much so I sent in some familiar things for him but that was only a couple of days til he got used to it.

He loves nursery!

Memyselfandthatotherperson · 28/09/2015 14:29

My ds started at 9mo. I cried. He didn't. A few times he has he settles as soon as I leave (have been known to check).

WhatstheT · 28/09/2015 14:31

I do indeed. There are 3 fathers to my kids. I'm skint and always have been and I Fucking hate getting up at a Rediculous time on a Sunday to go to work. BUT I have a fantastic hubby, amazing kids and friends who never let me down. Family means the world to me. Who wouldn't brag about that. I fucked up and married the wrong guy in my teens, there's folk on here who married the wrong one much older and wiser than I did. We had three kids, we split, I had a fling and got pregnant, I rekindled an old high school romance, married him and had a family. I've fucked up but I do my best. As I said before I didn't tin thus happened to real actual people

this thread is about someone who wanted re assurance from other's who's babies had gone to nursery.

So no.. you shouldn't be bragging... (not that anything you've wrote seems brag worthy)

Time and a place

53rdAndBird · 28/09/2015 14:33

You didn't think any real, actual mothers had full-time jobs? Seriously? Or you didn't think any real, actual people didn't have three dozen family members nearby willing to help out with childcare?

To be honest, even if all my family lived nearby I still might rather DD was in nursery. Most of them work, or they're at college or uni, or they have health problems that wouldn't let them race after a toddler all day. Or they are my husband's crazy cousins who I wouldn't trust with a goldfish, let alone my daughter!

Number3cometome · 28/09/2015 14:33

DS2 started nursery last Monday. He is 11 weeks old.

If one more person asks me why I am back at work early and looks at me with disgust when I mention where he is, I may explode.

Number3cometome · 28/09/2015 14:34

Oh god just seen the above. No doubt I will be flamed for being back at work so early.

WhatstheT · 28/09/2015 14:35

If one more person asks me why I am back at work early and looks at me with disgust when I mention where he is, I may explode.

Look at them dead in the eye and say "never been asked that before... how odd" and walk off

You do what you do for your family. We all have our reasons! :)

Cerseirys · 28/09/2015 14:37

Well in my kids nursery it's in the primary school and there's two nursery teachers for about 30 kids.

The nursery DS is at has a ratio of 1 member of staff per 2 babies. You're confusing nursery with nursery school. And you've said several times that you didn't think it was something "real actual people" did. Several of us have said yes, it is, but you keep repeating yourself. Surprisingly enough I suspect most of us on this thread are actual real people, and repeating yourself isn't going to make your misconceptions true.

Anyway, back to the OP. OP, DS has never cried at nursery drop off. On his first day he crawled off towards the toys with nary a backwards glance at me. 6 months on, he doesn't even want to come home as he's having too much fun and runs off when he sees me in the evening!

sproketmx · 28/09/2015 14:41

You didn't think any real, actual mothers had full-time jobs? Seriously? Or you didn't think any real, actual people didn't have three dozen family members nearby willing to help out with childcare?

Dude. What pert of this did you not get. Of course I knew other mums worked, what I didn't realise was that the kids went to nursery that young. I thought they went to family or childminders. I did not realise there were nurseries that took babies because it's not something I've heard of. I didn't know they had baby rooms and things in special nurseries. As I have said like a million times.

SansaryaAgain · 28/09/2015 14:43

You clearly have led a very sheltered life then if you were unaware of the existence of nurseries! And they aren't "special" nurseries, they're just nurseries. Nursery school is something different.

sproketmx · 28/09/2015 14:43

Several of us have said yes, it is, but you keep repeating yourself. I know but I feel I need to keep repeating this. I understand now that it was a misconception on my part. I an trying to explain why I thought that and what I thought happened instead

Number3cometome · 28/09/2015 14:46

OK so now you know, end of story.

53rdAndBird · 28/09/2015 14:48

It's one thing to say "I didn't know there were nurseries that took babies, oh that's interesting" and another thing to say "I didn't know there were nurseries that took babies, what an awful thing, I'd be suicidal if I had to do that!" when you don't actually know what a nursery is.

sproketmx · 28/09/2015 14:48

Ugh. Ok here goes...

I was aware of private nurseries but like I said I thought these were for kids the same ages as ones in school nursery but who go full time bot half days

I realise people work but I didn't realise nurseries took kids that young

I thought kids that young went to childminders if there wasn't family etc

I didn't mean to offend op or anyone else but I just thought as soon as I seen 13 month that it was very young for what my idea of a nursery was

I have explained what I thought nursery was and what made me think that.

Can we be done with the sort of personal attack now? Or do I need to keep the claws out?

WhatstheT · 28/09/2015 14:52

Can we be done with the sort of personal attack now? Or do I need to keep the claws out?

Once you were told what it was, multiple times, you still went on about jobs, your whole family life, who looks after your children and when, how you can't believe people can't stay at home...etc

You told me my situation was really sad...

What a load of tosh that is was just a misunderstanding and you didn't mean to offend. You had a negative opinion for everyone's situation but your own.

jorahmormont · 28/09/2015 15:20

Number3 people have no reason to flame you - if they do, it's their problem, not yours.