Who was BU here - traffic incident

[JuanPotatoTwo]

www.maidenhead-advertiser.co.uk/News/Areas/Maidenhead/Video-captures-railway-bridge-stand-off-between-two-drivers-which-held-up-traffic-for-more-than-30-minutes-23092015.htm

I'm sorry, I haven't worked out how to embed videos yet but, in a nutshell, two drivers come face to face under a railway bridge. The woman has right of way but the man refuses to reverse - claiming he doesn’t know how! It's one of those bridges where you can't always see the traffic you're supposed to give way to until you're already part way through so he should have been prepared to reverse.

Of course, if he really can't reverse, then he shouldn't be driving so it seems like the man is totally in the wrong - but I can't help feeling sorry for him. The video is fascinating if only to see how determined they both are.

What gabilan said. Absolutely.

Regardless of the right of way the treatment and demonization if the woman, both at the scene and on here (albeit by a minority) is disgusting.

minecraft your attitude particularly is revolting and concerning in equal measures.

References to the type of car ("flash" and then "basic") and the colour of her hair - FFS why would that ever be relevant.

The unadulterated hatred towards women who are not broken or on the bones of their arse depresses me.

If the man was already coming through when the woman arrived at the tunnel then she should have used her common sense and waited until he had come through before going. To me, it looks like he was there first so imo she was being unreasonable.

There is a small bridge in our village and one side has priority over the other but you can see clearly from both directions and if someone is already coming through then you wait.

That said, there have been similar incidents to the one here in our village. There was a 45 minute hold up one day because some idiot didn't wait when someone else was already coming through. Many people tried to reason with them and get someone to reverse but neither would back down! Ended up with someone having to call the police to deal with it in the end which is ridiculous and a waste of police (and everyone else's) time.

I once saw someone have a stand-off just outside our house with a herd of cows and a farm vehicle. He didn't see why he should back up the twenty feet or so into a side turning. The farmer quite understandably didn't think the driver's twattery was any reason to stop his cows.

The DSs and I sat on the fence and watched the ensuing carnage. One of the cows shat down the side of the car. It was awesome.

Jux I've inadvertently pheasant-herded whilst horse riding. They are daft birds and on a single track lane with high hedges they didn't seem to know what to do. So they waddled along in front of the horse, literally in a flap. Trouble was, the horse thought chasing pheasants was great fun and kept walking faster and faster so they'd waddle faster. Unfortunately I was giggling too much to exert control over the situation and make him stop. Why anybody tries shooting them is beyond me. A. it seems cruel to breed something just to shoot it and B. there must be more challenging things to hunt.

rainpouringrainbows, the trouble with your scenario is that you are saying that the man was petrified throughout. But why should he have been? At the point when he met the other car it was a perfectly routine incident; certainly he may have expected the other driver to reverse, but when it became clear within a couple of minutes that she wasn't going to, most people would simply have shrugged their shoulders, cursed a bit and reversed. There is no evidence whatsoever that he had cause to be petrified, nor indeed that there had been any road rage as you suggest: she was simply sitting there quite calmly, and all the shouting was directed at her.

If he was petrified, it was caused by his own inability to reverse, and that was entirely self-generated - if he is in fact never able to reverse he shouldn't have got into the car in the first place.

I'd guess he was 70-75. Older but not old. I don't think he looked petrified. Though I'd have been petrified by his reversing if I'd have been standing behind him.

The only good thing is that if he'd have been aiming at me, he'd have missed.

I think she was from the wrong. From the video (I'm not a local) it looks she had a straight road behind her and he had a bend, so she could see he was coming through, but he wouldnt be a ble to see her coming. As a PP said, it looks like he "committed" first, so he had right of way as they didn't reach the tunnel entrance at the same time. She also had a far easier reverse than him, so she shoudk have backed up.

Having said that the people shouting at her were also obviously in the wrong.

To those saying he obviously couldn't drive and shouldnt be on the road - I wonder how capable some of you would be at reversing around a corner with a massive crowd harassing you, in a hugely stressful situation.

They were both wrong. He shpuld have let someone reverse his car. She should not have entered if her exit was not clear. Right of way or not.

The crowd were arses. Horrible and misogynist.

A teenager and her friends can walk home. Especially as they have phones.

But mostly the council should install some traffic lights.

I'm in admiration of her bottle, I can't imagine how vulnerable she felt with all those aggressive blokes towering over here. Old git just wound his windows up & hid....

The old bloke should hopefully get a visit from Plod & a recommendation that he resits his test as he's obviously not fit to be on the roads.

I wonder how capable some of you would be at reversing around a corner with a massive crowd harassing you, in a hugely stressful situation.

I'd do it the same as every other time I reverse - if you wouldn't, I'll suggest that you need to get off the roads too.....

No-one comes out of this well. I live in a village and near a town with lots of very narrow roads with lots of parking on either side. All you need is a little give and take. It's important to know when to stand your ground (like when BMW-man went past a space to drive up to me despite the fact that I was committed and had right of way) and when to give a little (like when you come face to face with a bus / lorry / horsebox and despite it being your right of way, it's much easier for you to reverse than him).

The woman could have reversed as she was closest to the entrance. She could have been the bigger person.

The man also could have reversed as technically the woman had right of way. He could have been the bigger person.

What's happened here is that two entitled gits have come face to face. There's no cure for it, other than perhaps banging their heads together.

The crowd were complete arses, but then being held up by two stubborn buggers when there's no reason for it does tend to make one a little grumpy. I was held up by an oversize lorry trying to back into a drive today and got fairly peeved, and he at least had a legitimate reason for bringing the road to a halt.

The man's issue with reversing is a completely separate one, and I only hope he is never trying to park that car when there are children around. On a high street for example. Or in a supermarket.

I'm appalled at the language here and on he video directed at the woman. If the man was that terrified, he should have allowed someone to back up his vehicle. From the video he didn't look scared at all.

How that woman remained calm when all those idiots were hanging all over her car I don't know! She has some balls!

AND the right of way. Fair play to her.

Even if I had have been stuck in this with my 9yo stuck at school, I would have called the school and informed them.

That woman with the teenage daughter ought to be thoroughly ashamed of herself, both for raising a child that can't function, and for harranging a woman who had every right to sit there watch a man back up his car.

Just today I got waved down by some bloke. Told me to slow down as there was a man reversing in a van.

I said to him that I was perfectly safe, driving well under the limit, on my side of the road and mindful o a van reversing perfectly well on the other side, and that if I needed to stop, I could do so instantly so no need to patronise me or infantilise the driver of a van by waving at cars in traffic.

I despair of the way women are treated these days. Shall we just take up the burka and stay at home and be done with it?

Oh yes, that's right... We need to go out to work and earn money or the whole nation would crumble, right...

"To those saying he obviously couldn't drive and shouldnt be on the road - I wonder how capable some of you would be at reversing around a corner with a massive crowd harassing you, in a hugely stressful situation."

At the start of this situation, there wouldn't have been a massive crowd harassing him.

I do think that he had the more difficult angle to reverse from, if only because he might at first have been worried about another car coming around the corner as he reversed towards it.

But as all traffic was stopped, and the tunnel was fairly wide, he shouldn't have been in such a bad way that he couldn't reverse at all. Most people might feel shaken, and upset, and possibly even embarrassed, but they should still be capable of completing the manoeuvre, even if they were a bit slower than normal while they did it.

I'm actually quite concerned about his safety in going forward once the situation was resolved. I hope he was okay.

"Maybe she didn't feel vulnerable at all. Maybe she was absolutely fine."

Maybe she was, hopefully she was. But she'd been shouted at, sworn at, laughed at, ranted at, and had threats made to her safety and the safety of her car. No matter how good a face she put on, I find it hard to believe she was absolutely fine.

I was attacked at work once, two male customers cornered me in an outside area, both of them shouting, one of them swearing, their friends gathered around laughing, before the sweary one came at me as though he were going to punch me in the face but instead picked up a piece of furniture and threw it at me. At this point the other man and the laughing friends all disappeared and I was able to escape.

Then his girlfriend came after me screaming, swearing and shouting as well, and I was subjected to another fifteen or twenty minutes of verbal abuse before help arrived.

I got away unhurt but I was running on adrenaline throughout it and probably looked much the same as the woman in the video, impassive and hard-faced. But I was terrified for weeks afterwards and could only function at work if I was wearing the police attack alarm. I really believe if I'd shown how frightened I was of them, they would have gone even further and physically hurt me.

That woman could have been holding it all together just long enough to drive away, we don't know. But just because she looked more composed than he did doesn't mean she really was. I suppose we'll never find out either way, about either of them, how they were really feeling at the time.

I think both of them were in the wrong frankly.

It's impossible from the video to tell who entered the right of way section first (though he was further under the bridge, due to speed, visibility, road layout its not proof he was there before her), however it was clear from the video that it would have been easier for her to reverse than him given she was nearer the underpass exit.

Regardless....the fact that he could barely drive means he shouldn't be on the road and whether right or wrong, the woman felt a point on principle was enough to block a road for 40 minutes was just downright egotistical and entitled.

I didn't like the pressure the woman driver was subjected to, but I can understand why people felt very cross, when it would have been very easy for her to just reverse a few meters and let everyone get on their way.

Some drivers seem to have lost all consideration for other road users, she may have had right of way but as he was already committed to passing the bridge all she had to do was wait for him to clear it before entering which would have held her up for a matter of seconds. Even if she didn't see him until the last minute a short reverse would have taken no time.
Why did she feel the need to make it into a power struggle? Perhaps she couldn't reverse either.

My mother always said "Beemers for dreamers and Mercs for berks." That's about right in this instance.

After watching the video... She's a bloody bitch!

He cannot be telling truth anout not being able to reverse though. How does he het in/out of driveways, parking spaces etc. Unless her perpetually drives forwards never stopping, at dome point he must reverse.

After watching the video... She's a bloody bitch!

I've watched the video too. While I think she should have reversed, I feel your judgement on her is a little unkind.

He cannot be telling truth anout not being able to reverse though. How does he het in/out of driveways, parking spaces etc. Unless her perpetually drives forwards never stopping, at dome point he must reverse.

You'd be surprised. Have you been out on the roads or read driving threads on here lately?

It all made me think of this

Plenty of people can't reverse. They admit it on here all the time and go to extraordinary lengths to avoid it. If they do have to reverse (usually out of a space ime), I would imagine they do what I see lots of people doing on a day to day basis. Swing out, sometimes miss the other vehicles/trees/hedges by accident and sometimes scrape them, screw it up, pull back in, try again, take it too wide, hope nobody else is around and they can use the whole carpark to swing their car round etc.

Not being able to reverse is to driving as maths is to memories of school. It seems okay to say "oh I can't reverse, I'm hopeless" in the same way people "can't do numbers". I don't mean people who genuinely can't do maths or have a real mental block but the perception that there are areas in life where it's acceptable to never bother even learning. I think we still see it now with maths btw. As a society we're fairly obsessed with reading levels and a bit apathetic about other strands of learning.

I know someone who is scared of turning right across traffic or using roundabouts.

She not only goes to enormous lengths to avoid doing that but tells me that it is reckless of me and anyone else to do it when they could drive a little miles out of their way and turn left or use traffic lights.

I don't travel in her car and I always watch out for it.

I don't think she's a one-off.

Both idiots.
He was an idiot because he (said he) couldn't reverse. Should not be on the road.
She was an idiot not to recognise he was a useless idiot & solve the problem quickly.

I have watched the video and see two people who if each had given a little would have resolved the situation in a couple of minutes , rather than cause mayhem for many other people for half an hour .

Surely no-one on MN cannot reverse ? It is part of driving , the car goes both backwards and forwards ( because it has wheels and gears and shit ) , I can understand those who might struggle with a reverse park if they passed their test around the 80's , but that can be avoided in most situations .

Surely no-one on MN cannot reverse ?

Have you not been keeping up on MN lately Frumpet?