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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Who was BU here - traffic incident

235 replies

JuanPotatoTwo · 24/09/2015 09:37

www.maidenhead-advertiser.co.uk/News/Areas/Maidenhead/Video-captures-railway-bridge-stand-off-between-two-drivers-which-held-up-traffic-for-more-than-30-minutes-23092015.htm

I'm sorry, I haven't worked out how to embed videos yet but, in a nutshell, two drivers come face to face under a railway bridge. The woman has right of way but the man refuses to reverse - claiming he doesn’t know how! It's one of those bridges where you can't always see the traffic you're supposed to give way to until you're already part way through so he should have been prepared to reverse.

Of course, if he really can't reverse, then he shouldn't be driving so it seems like the man is totally in the wrong - but I can't help feeling sorry for him. The video is fascinating if only to see how determined they both are.

OP posts:
Elendon · 26/09/2015 13:28

Clearly the man should not have been driving. Clearly the woman was given much more abuse than the man, both verbally and physically. How anyone cannot see this is troubling.

I'm wondering in the man was drunk or suffering a minor stroke. (why didn't he roll down his driver's window to talk to anyone?)

Why anyone didn't call an ambulance or the police is beyond me. My concern and total focus would have been for him. He should not be driving.

kali110 · 26/09/2015 13:32

Elendon the police was called

kali110 · 26/09/2015 13:48

unlucky i agree with you!though you may acused of doing mens dirty work Hmm
I was wondering why she didn't put her top down either.
If i felt threatened i wouldn't have kept it down.
I also would have been on the phone to the police repeatedly till they turned up.

LadyShirazz · 26/09/2015 13:58

Didn't realise he was in his sixties. He looks older from the video.

kungfupannda · 26/09/2015 14:06

That classics thread was me! I had my old posts name-changed around the time of the 'This is my child' campaign, as I'd put my foot in it and mentioned the campaign thread to a family member I'd previously posted about.

I didn't realise it had finished up in classics - or that there had been requests for further updates. I never saw the woman again. I don't know whether being required to occasionally behave like a normal human being spoiled the lanes for her entirely, or whether she changed her commuting time. I did see someone who looked like her once, but if it was her she was in a different car. I was closer to the passing place in that instance so her right of way, so I didn't have the chance to see if she behaved in usual reverse-refusing manner.

I have to say, I'm glad she did back down fairly quickly when I did make my stand - if the traffic had been building up I would have had to give in - I'm not quite as nonchalant as the woman in the video, and also those lanes back right up when something goes wrong. The last time it happened they had to send a police motor cyclist to sort it out and I wouldn't be able to show my face around the village if I caused that!

I stopped doing that journey a few weeks later as DS moved to a pre-school in the opposite direction, so I was no longer going against the flow of traffic. I've never met anyone else who completely refused to reverse - there have been a few who haven't been able to manage it, including one who made several attempts, finished up in the hedge, and then sent his wife to apologise and ask me and the two cars behind me if we could go back all the way to the next passing place!

We do seem to have fewer complete knobs using the lanes at the moment - most people seem to have figured out that they need to co-operate over whoever is closest to the passing place being the one to reverse. The trend at the moment seems to be people who don't know how wide their car is - some people try and plough on through when there's about a 2 inch gap between a wall and a tractor, and some people can't get through gaps that would happily accommodate a combine-harvester. We have a narrow hill a few hundred yards from our house, with a bend in the middle of it. You can see if there's anyone coming up or down when you get to it, and most people wait, but you do get the odd muppet who keeps trundling on merrily and is then flummoxed when they can't fit through the resulting 3mm gap between the other car and the hedge.

I still spend a lot of my time driving around swearing quietly to myself, but I haven't had any major threats to my blood pressure since the non-reversing woman!

kungfupannda · 26/09/2015 14:11

I've just skimmed my old thread. You all promised to come and dress as zombies and do the thriller dance down my lanes and it never happened.

I want thriller-dancing MN zombies!

Can we do it anyway? Even without the non-reversing woman?

hackmum · 26/09/2015 14:23

Haven't read the whole thread, sorry, but the whole thing was extraordinary.

Clearly they were both unreasonable as either one of them could have reversed - it wasn't a long tunnel, so it was just a question of reversing a few yards. I have occasionally had to reverse even though it's my right of way and even though it's annoying it's just something you accept.

I didn't think much of the man in the hi-vis jacket who kept swearing at the woman and called her a "silly cow".

Why the man claimed not to know how to reverse is beyond me. How can you drive a car if you can't reverse it? I couldn't understand why someone couldn't have just offered to get in his car and reverse it for him.

herderofcats · 26/09/2015 15:21

Ah, I don't know he's in his sixties - he just looks it to me, compared to the 70 and 80 year olds I know.

amarmai · 26/09/2015 20:08

She could not put up her roof top as men were leaning into and on her vehicle. I imagine too she got frozen with fear at the increasing number men attacking her. She was in a very vulnerable sit in an open car under a tunnel surrounded by angry men directing their aggression on her . She must have wondered how far they were capable of going, yelling about tipping her car over, calling her derogatory names including her hair color and age,reaching inside her vehicle trying to seize the steering wheel or her and no one came to her aid . Then a woman ran up and joined in the abuse and blame game=like what some pps have done here on mn. Contrast that with the friendly sympathetic helpful behaviour the same men then showed to the male driver=like what some pps have done here on mn.

giraffesCantDoThat · 27/09/2015 01:23

Hello kungfu!

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