Should children be encouraged to offer their seats to adults?

[cornflowers]

At ds's gymnatics class, the parents all wait upstairs and watch from a sort of balcony. There aren't enough seats for everyone, so unless you're slightly early (almost never happens in my case!) you can't be sure of a seat. A lot of parents bring other dc along with them, so there are often several children in seats while adults are left to stand. This week, one little boy (approx 3-4 yrs) was alternately sitting on the floor/standing but had put three soft toys on his seat. I'd had an exhausting day & my back was aching from standing up for so long, so I asked the dm of this child whether I could sit in the chair occupied by the soft toys. She said, "Sorry, no, we're using that." AIBU to think that small children can sit on their parents laps in situations like this, and that adults should be offered a seat?

brokenhearted - correct.

They pay half fare, so they have to stand for adults who don't have a seat. It's just the way it is.

A 3 year old can sit on the floor just fine. I would struggle to sit on the floor and get up with my knee issues.

Exactly. It's generally the case that children are less uncomfortable on the floor than adults.

I always wonder in these threads: would most of you ask your child to stand for an adult relative if seats were scarce? For example, most of our family photos at Big gatherings show children sitting on the floor, or on laps, or perched on the arms of chairs. There is no way our parents would have let us take up a seat while an adult stood or sat in the floor.

There is no way my three children would sit in a seat if an adult is standing. I wouldn't even have to ask, they would just automatically do it. Basic manners surely?

Jesus if I had to sit on the floor you'd need a winch to get me up again.

I always wonder in these threads: would most of you ask your child to stand for an adult relative if seats were scarce? For example, most of our family photos at Big gatherings show children sitting on the floor, or on laps, or perched on the arms of chairs. There is no way our parents would have let us take up a seat while an adult stood or sat in the floor.

THIS. I'm nearly 40 and it's only in the past five to ten years that at family gatherings I'm guaranteed to get a seat (and to have the children of the family be nudged to move if there aren't any). Kids are fine to sit down but if there's an adult standing then they need to move (unless the adult says not to)

Yes but I know my child can sit on the floor. A friend's child with a serious but hidden back problem can't.

I would move my child for an adult but wouldn't ask a stranger to move their child.

I don't understand why adults can't stand for half an hour. And if they can't I don't understand why they aren't capable of saying to parent in charge of toddler - 'excuse me, do you mind if you move those soft toys so I can sit down?'

(IMO Children should get priority on transport for seats - they don't have the balance or strength for standing up on a moving vehicle, the vehicle is usually designed for adults to stand (with bars to hold onto at head height) and on a crowded vehicle they are at a risk of being injured or an obstacle to others)

I think that is what op did Tondelayo, but she was told the chair was in use.

I agree with you re public transport though

So she was apologies. In that case the other M was a cowbag bit precious.

Koala no, I wouldn't expect my son to give up his seat for an adult relative (genuine need excepted) and I'd tell them to jog on if they asked.

My dc are 7 and 5 and I make them stand up for an adult (if they need prompting, they very often don't any more).

I find it awfully rude if someone doesn't tbh.

Yes of course they should but not on MN where everyone has a hidden disability.

YANBU - I've only come across this rudeness on MN, tbh.
Of course a small child should let an adult have a seat.
Small child can
a) sit on parent's lap
b) sit on floor and be able to get up much more easily than most adults
c) is most likely to be up and down / back and forth / playing / not using seat anyway.

Older child / teen can also stand or sit on floor more easily than an adult.

I would also expect a younger adult to stand for someone who looked in more need - be that a particularly elderly person, a heavily pregnant person or a person who seemed to have mobility issues.

Fortunately, my dc, and most young people I encounter, seem to have been brought up with these basic manners.

I think people should offer seats to people who are more in need of them than they are. The age is immaterial.

And I think many adults would benefit from a bit of yoga if sitting on the floor is an issue.

I think the teddies were bu.

I think children should be taught politeness, courtesy, good manners and consideration for others.

I also think that if there are fewer chairs than there are people, then the children should sit on the floor.

My dad is 73 and won't sit if anyone in the room is standing. At family gatherings,my mum always sits on the floor, as do I (approaching 50) (and dc)

I only mention it because of the number of relatively young people who apparently can't sit on the floor. Perhaps if you'd done it more often you would be able to

Tondelay I fail to see how yoga would make it any easier for me to sit on a floor and get up again.

Soft toys don't need seats. Don't ask, just remove them.

It wouldn't because you have a replacement hip and my comment is aimed at you Sooty

isn't !!! sorry

Fair enough.

My 71-year-old mother can (and does) get on ladders to cut tree branches and kneel for hours to lay paving in her garden. She certainly has no difficulty sitting on the floor.

That said, I'd think any child letting her sit on the floor while they occupied a chair had shocking manners.