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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I love karma!

72 replies

CharlieBear15 · 31/08/2015 23:26

My stbxh is struggling. He has hardly any money and struggles to pay his rent ect. This isn't helped by the fact he drives 80miles nearly every day to see his girlfriend.

Anyway, he borrowed some money last month to take the dc and his gf out for the day I'm a twat.

He's abusive. That's the reason I left.

Anyway, about 4 months ago his car tax ran out. I told him he wasn't going to be allowed to take the dc anywhere if he wasn't taxed. A week later he tells me he is.

Tonight he dropped the kids off after a long weekend.

As he was taking his gf home he was pulled over. He's lost his car.
He's lost his log book or I may have chucked it out after he punched me for the final time

This means he can't get work tomorrow, and his gf can't get home.

I love karma. After all the abuse I get weekly!

Poor him, he hasn't got my dad to borrow him money to bail him out now.

OP posts:
Birdsgottafly · 31/08/2015 23:29

I can understand your enjoyment in things going tits up for him.

However, I'd worry about the fact he has been driving your children round in an uninsured car and he's capable of being abusive.

Why are you still taking abuse weekly, yet he's having access, so freely?

lougle · 31/08/2015 23:31

I hope you can move on soon. It must be horrible to feel so hurt that you'd be glad that someone else is in difficulty.

Original poster
CharlieBear15 · 31/08/2015 23:32

Because the police do nothing. I'm fuming that he was driving around in an un taxed car, I had no idea until tonight.

Iv reported him for abuse. Currently getting an injunction out.

OP posts:
BestZebbie · 31/08/2015 23:33

Also worried that your children are going to stay with someone who has punched you repeatedly. :-/

If you aren't actually divorced yet, be careful that he doesn't try to take out car finance or a loan that you could be partly liable for as his wife.

RealityCheque · 31/08/2015 23:35

You sound delightful.

Original poster
CharlieBear15 · 31/08/2015 23:35

Oh I am moved on. And so happy he's struggling!!

I have NO sympathy what so ever. He didn't care when I was begging to borrow money to buy food last year for our children. Or when he took all the things "he paid for" when he left, including our 5 year old sons wii who had no idea what he had done wrong.

OP posts:
Original poster
CharlieBear15 · 31/08/2015 23:38

Ha. I have no sympathy for him.

Karma.

Having a computer monitor smashed over my back when I gave him "attitude".

Being dragged up the stairs by my hair.

Kicked out the car when my anxiety from pnd is playing up on the motorway.

OP posts:
Birdsgottafly · 31/08/2015 23:38

You need to focus on protecting your children and putting a stop to how're he "causes shit weekly".

I've been in an abusive relationship with a game player and I know how they have you focusing on them and what's happening to them and not on what should be the most important to you.

This is enough to temporally stop access, if you need time out of seeing him.

Original poster
CharlieBear15 · 31/08/2015 23:40

As I said, currently in the process of an injunction and getting enough evidence to go court for a access through a contact centre.

OP posts:
3CheekyLittleMonkeys · 31/08/2015 23:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
CharlieBear15 · 31/08/2015 23:42

Nope he pays not a penny.

OP posts:
MaddyinaPaddy · 31/08/2015 23:42

To take delight in anyone's misfortune is really not an attractive trait. Also I am puzzled as to what difference it makes rk your kids whether the car is taxed or not

Dragonsdaughter · 31/08/2015 23:46

Its probably the insurance the op is actually worried about.

gamerchick · 31/08/2015 23:47

I'm with you OP. See it as a grace period for time till the injunction.

YellowDinosaur · 31/08/2015 23:47

To take delight in anyone's misfortune is really not an attractive trait

Oh Ffs don't be so bloody sanctimonious Angry

*Having a computer monitor smashed over my back when I gave him "attitude".

Being dragged up the stairs by my hair.

Kicked out the car when my anxiety from pnd is playing up on the motorway*

He didn't care when I was begging to borrow money to buy food last year for our children. Or when he took all the things "he paid for" when he left, including our 5 year old sons wii who had no idea what he had done wrong

I have absolutely no issue whatsoever in the op taking great delight and dancing a jig about misfortune happening to this utter cunt of a man.

Original poster
CharlieBear15 · 31/08/2015 23:47

Because he's driving me children around in it, and if we were to be stopped it wouldn't be fair on the kids.

Oh please. He is a violent bully who has been hit with a karma bus. After everything he's done to me and the dc he deserves some unhappiness!

The reason he doesn't pay his very cheap rent is because he would rather take him and his gf and her dc out and about.

Together 8 years and I was the one in charge of paying bills ect so he hasn't a clue

OP posts:
Palomb · 31/08/2015 23:48

He sounds like a cunt but seriously op, having this much hate in your heart is no good for you. Get the injunction and erase him from your mind.

greenwichjelly · 31/08/2015 23:49

You sound like an immature little girl. Grow up.

pastaofplenty · 31/08/2015 23:51

OP - why is he allowed access to his DC if he has been so abusive? Sorry don't understand why that has been allowed to happen

Jw35 · 31/08/2015 23:52

He shouldn't be anywhere near your children, he's a violent bully.
It's ok to be glad of karma I suppose but I think the fact you care at all about his life is a shame. Hope you get the injunction

ElementaryMyDear · 31/08/2015 23:53

Loving all these sanctimonious types who claim that they seriously wouldn't be the tiniest bit happy if someone who was violent and abusive towards them got into difficulties through his own stupidity.

Birdsgottafly · 31/08/2015 23:53

So have you made sensible plans to stop access (I still don't understand why you've given him open access)?

Whatever happens to him, does impact on your children, whilst he has free rein.

Iusedtobeapenguin · 31/08/2015 23:55

op do you trust this abusive and violent man with your dc? I'm assuming you don't if you want to involve a contact centre.

If so do you realise you don't have to allow unsupervised contact in the meantime - you can wait until it goes to court so you have all the necessary safety precautions in place, for you and your DC.

DixieNormas · 31/08/2015 23:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
CharlieBear15 · 31/08/2015 23:55

Currently working with womensaid to get a non molestation order. And trying to Sort contact out. X

OP posts: