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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

5year old in a pram

129 replies

Jo4040 · 31/08/2015 19:30

Please bear with me, its not totally how it sounds...

Since my DS was born me and my partner have always put him in his pram just before bed time and gone on a very long walk. He would then fall asleep. When we got back we would put him into bed.

We didn't do this to get our DS of to sleep. We did this for exercise.

When my DS2 was born a few months ago, DS1 was too big for a pram, so we bought a step however he quickly outgrew this. Therefore the evening walks dwindled out as he couldn't keep up with the walks.

Now that the long walks are drawing in, with me and my OH be U to buy a double pram. We have seen a cheap one in a charity shop. It has a seat at the front and one at the back. You would not be able to see DS (4,nearly 5) sat in the back, drifting of to sleep under a blanket.

He is happy to do this as on holiday when he was tired a couple of nights he climbed in the pram on the way home and we carried baby back to the apartment.

We read him stories all the time and the bedtime routine would still happen...bath, teeth, pjs, but he would just climb into the pram.

Me and OH can't afford the gym membership but really want to do abit of exercise and its nice to go out on a walk at night and have a chat together. Also I rely on relatives for childcare in the day so can't really ask anyone to have kids at night whilst we go out for our hourly walk.

OP posts:
Doublebubblebubble · 31/08/2015 20:54

Sorry should have hit refresh before I posted - d'oh still think 7 is too late though. X h

5madthings · 31/08/2015 20:57

Op he is the same age as my dd, also five in Dec. She has only recently stopped using the buggy, she scooters or bikes. But school is two miles away and she couldn't have walked it day in day out earlier in the year. Now she bikes.

We often do evening walks in the summer, esp when on holiday.

People are funny about what they consider to be the right bedtime routine! So much judging here. Op has said her boy can go to sleep on his own, this is just something they like to do. Can't believe people are getting their knickers in such a twist.

Pico2 · 31/08/2015 21:02

I really don't see the problem. It is unusual in our culture, but that doesn't make it wrong. It sounds lovely to me.

ALemonyPea · 31/08/2015 21:02

The early evening walks sound lovely. I do agree with PPs who have suggested getting a scooter. Another idea would be something like this might be a good alternative as he can both sit and stand. I used one when my DS3 was a newborn for my 4 year old DS and it was a godsend.

Original poster
Jo4040 · 31/08/2015 21:05

Iv posted because I just wanted people advice/thoughts.

Iv taken into account what people have said and I have shown my OH and we like the idea of the scooter, earlier walks.

I suppose I gave sugary description s of the walks to the posters that replied that they like the idea.

Didn't think Id get this pulled apart. Just expected some friendly advice Confused

My DS is a happy, confident child. I wouldn't describe him as a 'poor kid'. If he ever showed any signs of not liking the walks. It's simple, they would end. Iv asked him how he would feel about going in the back of the pram and he said he would like it. Hes that friendly actually and well known in our area if his friends were to see him, he would wave at them and shout something like 'Look at me! Do you wanna turn?!' Iv never known a child with such great people skills. Not like me at all.

P.S. OH said he will put him on his shoulders if he gets bored of the scooter. The trailer with the fairy lights sounds cool. That's the kind of quirky thing only someone on MN can suggest! Ta

OP posts:
lovemakespeace · 31/08/2015 21:06

I'm surprised there is so much negativity for this. If it works for you as a family then do it OP :) He is still only little and if he enjoys it then what's the harm? He will soon let you know if not.
We live in such an increasingly child-centred culture. Not everything has to revolve around your kids. I would argue the best gift you can give them is a stable happy marriage so if this is good time for you and your husband to spend together then keep going.

CheekyMaleekey · 31/08/2015 21:07

He's not tiny - he's about to start school. I can't understand why he's not walking or scooting and why you can't do earlier in the evening, so he can fall asleep in bed.

As another poster said - your descriptions of your walks are sugary. We all know what it's like to walk around at 7pm.

Original poster
Jo4040 · 31/08/2015 21:07

Alemonpea...that's fab. We had one of them steps/surf boards but he said his legs got tired just standing after abit so we made him run along, but I like that idea.

OP posts:
Chippednailvarnish · 31/08/2015 21:09

Didn't think Id get this pulled apart

You haven't been, talk about over sensitive!

solidarityplease · 31/08/2015 21:24

I think we can all agree walking together is a lovely family pastime.
I just think the timing is a little wrong if DS is going to be scooting or walking then going to bed very soon after.
Adults are advised against any sort of exercise very close to bed time as it raises adrenalin levels and body temperature and is generally stimulating. This makes it harder to sleep.

I assume the same would be the case for children?

CheekyMaleekey · 31/08/2015 21:26

Don't most families go for walks together? Time it earlier in the evening or go for longer weekend walks, and make sure your DS is active and involved, not tucked away.

XCChamps · 31/08/2015 21:29

I've never understood that bit about not exercising before bedtime. After running a half marathon all my body is crying out for is sleep and I can never stay awake for more than a few minutes if I sit in a comfy chair after a bracing walk.

A walk at 6-7pm followed by quick bath, story, bed sounds perfect to me. I don't know what's wrong with sugary descriptions either and I agree that parents who want to walk and chat together are a very good thing for a child.

Lurkedforever1 · 31/08/2015 21:32

Should have added I don't think 7 in itself is too late for a 5yr old to be out walking, mine was out way past that and there is no way that was a suitable time for her bedtime routine. I was going off the fact that ops ds gets tired at that time, therefore it should be earlier in his case.

BlackeyedSusan · 31/08/2015 21:32

sod what anyone else thinks. your excercise and well being is important

solidarityplease · 31/08/2015 21:35

I think that it is a generally held view and that there are always exceptions Smile

Although I will say that as a teacher, the lessons after break time where the children have spent the best part of 15 minutes racing non stop around the playground, are often the hardest to regain focus. They're high as kites.
I have to peel some off the ceiling Grin

SaloonBalloon · 31/08/2015 21:50

"They're high as kites.
I have to peel some off the ceiling grin"

Aha.... if my DC get like this just before bedtime they are a nightmare to wind down. I have to judge/time things very carefully to avoid this!

When my 7 year old gets that manic wild eyes overtired thing going on and can't sleep I occasionally take her for a spin in her old pushchair.

MissDuke · 31/08/2015 22:00

I never understand the scooter thing. My children always tire more quickly on scooters and I end up carrying the flipping thing, are we missing something here? Not sure if maybe we have rubbish scooters or something.

Op is that the earliest you can manage to go with work commitments etc (sorry if you already answered this). Also, if you do decide to go ahead, could you put the baby in a sling to save the need for a double buggy? Those things can be horrible to push.

VerityWaves · 31/08/2015 22:02

I think your walks sound lovely !

Mrsfrumble · 31/08/2015 22:15

I think it sounds lovely too. I'm actually a little envious; we couldn't do it as DH doesn't get home until 7.30.

I think the wagon idea sounds great, but I wouldn't raise an eyebrow at a nearly 5 YO in a buggy either. It's not like he would be riding in it all the time. Once a day is not going to make his legs whither if he's walking / scooting / riding his bike the rest of the time.

MidnightDinosaur · 31/08/2015 22:20

I think your walks sound lovely op (as does your bedtime routine but you weren't actually asking about that so don't know why posters are commenting)

I do agree though, a bike or scooter would be better although buy the double pram if you want and if your ds1 gets too tired on he bike/scooter, he can hop in the pram.

There's no need for a child to be in bed at 7pm on the dot unless you have a child that needs to be asleep by 7pm.

In Summer, we have dinner and then head to the beach most evenings, sometimes we're not back until 9pm, showers, drink, snack and bed by probably close to 10pm. Fresh air, fun and exercise makes for happy, tired children who will sleep well.

Get the pram op, take a scooter along with you and enjoy your walks.

AndNowItsSeven · 31/08/2015 22:25

I think it's a little bit selfish but not intentionally on your part.
Your ds need to be tucked up in bed at bedtime not squashed in a buggy so you can enjoy a walk with your dp. Family walks are great but your ds should actually be walking and it should happen after dinner and before bath and bed,
The tv in the bedroom is really not a good idea.

hibbleddible · 31/08/2015 22:31

missduke dd will travel far further happily with her scooter than walking.

We have a Micra scooter the one everyone has

The cords that hook over the scooter and you can pull are good if they tire.

Mrsfrumble · 31/08/2015 22:36

But why "should" he be? Because that's what everyone else does?

Would it be damaging his health to ride in a pushchair once a day (providing that he's getting plenty of exercise during the day)? Would spending time with his family, talking with his parents and listening to them talk to each other, damage his mental wellbeing? As previous posters have pointed out, not all small children are in bed by 7. Mine aren't; they'd never see their father if they were.

CheekyMaleekey · 31/08/2015 22:37

But this could clearly should be in bed because he falls asleep mid-walk.

HoursTurnIntoDays · 31/08/2015 23:46

I'd love to be pushed along in a pram in the fresh air while I drift off to sleep. Maybe I'm weird

I say do it if you and your DS are happy. I think sometimes people totally overthink these things