To wonder how to go about picking up the pieces?

[crepeyneck]

STBXH left for another woman. He pays maintenance for the children but left me on a tiny salary struggling to pay the mortgage every month. Mortgage was based on his salary as he is a high earner. Absolutely distraught.

Did you get a solicitor involved? That should all have been sorted before the divorce.

Maybe you simply can't afford to keep the house on your own? I know it's hard, but is there property nearby which you could afford, if you got a deposit from the house you're in now?

No advice but want to wish you well. There will be people on here who will help you though.

Surely his name is still on the mortgage?
Get a solicitors advice, but let STBXH know that you cannot afford the mortgage repayments and he needs to consider what effect it will have on him if you default.