Was I wrong?

[Ballpitintheway]

Nc for this one sorry

Dh is at work, eldest dc at a campout tonight, and dts (18 months) tucked up in bed, fast asleep. Both dts sleep through, rarely wake, and are in separate cots, so safe and contained.

Realised about half an hour ago I'd run out of milk, so had to nip to the shop to grab some. Now, the shop is literally at the end of my drive. Out the back door, along the path (12 feet ish), through the gate, down the drive, and I'm at the shop. I can see part of the house from the shop door (but not the till). The shop is so close that the baby monitor still works with picture and sound at the back of the shop, and is definitely closer than my garden.

Babies asleep, so I grabbed money and baby monitor, ran to the shop, grabbed the milk, paid, and came back home. Was away less than 2 minutes, and could see and hear dts at all times via the monitor. Heard the phone ring too.

Came home, did 1471, called friend back. She asked where I'd been, I said I'd gone to the shop. She proceeded to give me a proper lecture over how dangerous, irresponsible, etc etc I'd been, and how lucky I was that nothing happened.

Wtf? Was I really being irresponsible? I need milk for dts for breakfast, and honestly can't see that I put dts in any danger at all - the only way into the house was past the shop, all other doors are locked, they're probably more likely to come to harm when I'm in the shower!

Friend has told me that she's too angry to explain anything, but I'm honestly confused. If I did wrong, I'll certainly not do it again, but did I?

[marinacortina]

Why "wouldn't you do it personally"? What are you afraid of?

[CluckingBelle]

I'd do it, if the baby monitor works. When I had my eldest I lived in a flat, and would visit my friends in a neighboring flat while she slept as the baby monitor worked from there.

I have 3 young kids, it takes so long lugging them everywhere you go. If my baby monitor reached to the shop I'd probably go frequently for equally important things such as wine and chocolate.

[Icimoi]

What's all this 'if you lived in a mansion' business? If you lived in a mansion, you simply wouldn't go to an area of it where you couldn't hear your children, whether that's on the monitor or in person. You would not sit ensconced in a remote part of it and think 'this is fine because I haven't left the house'

Why wouldn't you, if you had a monitor? Sadly I've never lived in a house that big, but it's news to me if it's the norm for people who do to decamp upstairs as soon as the dc go to bed so as to ensure they can hear them.

[TheHouseOnBellSt]

Icimoi is right! You'd not neglect an entire mansion just because you'd had a baby ffs! I wouldn't anyway!

[Floggingmolly]

The only part you did wrong was telling the nosy bugger on the end of the phone that you'd been to the shops. Next time just say you were in the bathroom. Why did she need to know why you didn't answer first time, anyway?

[chrome100]

Oh God, I'd do it. You did nothing wrong.

[chrome100]

And I would do it even if the monitor didn't work.

[SnapesCapes]

I'd do it. Neighbours of ours have parcels delivered here often through the summer (he's a mechanic so presumably car bits) and a few nights ago when DH was working away I saw the wife come home at around 11pm, thought I'd pop the packages over to them and saw no harm in leaving DS1 (9) and DS2 (4) asleep in their beds while I did it. I could see our front door (which I'd locked) from their house and stood chatting to her for five minutes. It's no different to me cooking tea while they play in the garden, or taking a shower while they're in bed.

[PingpongDingDong]

9 years old and 4 years old is very different to 18 months old, I wouldn't think twice in those circumstances Snapes. Op, I don't think it's a big deal but I probably would feel worried about doing it. I'd just feel weird leaving the house when the kids were on their own in it.

[TRexingInAsda]

She probably didn't realise quite how close the shop is to your house don't tell her next time

[ihateminecraft]

In the circumstances you describe - absolutely. In our old house (halls adjoining terraces) we often used to go into our neighbour's house leaving the baby and taking the monitor with us. Neighbours did the same. Had even been known to go in for dinner with one of us popping back every so often.

[LazyLohan]

I wouldn't do it personally because I'm a born worrier and every single possible scenario that could go wrong would play on my mind all night and I wouldn't enjoy myself at all. If that's not a problem for other people, fine, but I'm not going to go out and have a crap night and feel anxious just because Mumsnet says so.

[cardibach]

Lazy what's enjoying yourself hot yo do with it? It's not a party it's a shop run to buy milk!

[tobysmum77]

So really it's a bit like going into the garage to get my washing out of the tumble dryer. yanbu.

I think the risk of taking the dts is higher as they could potentially run under a car.

[Garlick]

Slight RTFT fail there, I suspect ...

[PrimalLass]

It's absolutely fine. I would have done the same. It's just like getting something out of your garage if that was at the end of your drive rather than the shop.

[TheReason]

Mumsnet is weird sometimes

People who leave children in cars while they buy petrol or leave primary school children at home while they are out are often flamed. People say all sorts of disasterous things might happen

But people are flamed for not letting small children play outside on the street out of sight of their parents - The parent who doesn't allow this is told they are being over protective

I would have had no issue with you going to the shop. My youngest is age 3 and I pop down to the shop which is very near my house - I don't have any baby monitor. I wouldn't go of in the car to a further away shop.

[spreektengels]

I did the same lived next door to the shop so monitor still worked! I was a single mum no family about. If I didn't get milk i would of have had a very angry baby ds at 3am. The risk is so small!

[FryOneFatManic]

TBH, the argument that the OP could have collapsed, etc while at the shop, is pants. In fact, I believe the children would have been found quicker than if she'd collapsed at home, when they wouldn't have been found until the DH returned in the morning.

I don't feel the OP WBU; she had the monitor, was so close to home with no roads to cross, the twins asleep and likely to remain so, etc.

I'd say she was in a position to do more in the event of an emergency than if she'd been in the shower, for example, where she'd be less likely to hear the twins if there was a problem.

[LazyLohan]

Sorry, I was thinking more of the person who's been to the barbecue. I probably wouldn't go for milk either. I'd probably have a herbal tea instead. I don't see what your problem is Cardi, some people would, some people wouldn't. Surely it's up to them.

[UrethraFranklin1]

but you're saying all the what if scenarios would torture you...Luke what? if you can't tell us, then you don't actually have any.

[LittleMissIntrovert]

The shop is at the end of the drive, would people comment if you went to put the bin out at the end of the drive probably some would but is it really any different?

Your friend might not do the same, but that doesn't mean she should judge you for it!

[PegsPigs]

The video monitor still worked. You were fine. If you had collapsed someone would have seen the monitor anyway.

[MitzyLeFrouf]

I'd definitely do this. I'd even have tarried a whole to choose a bar of chocolate.

Angry friend is a tit.

[marcopront]

Does your friend live locally. Maybe you should start calling her at 8pm saying "I need milk, could you come and babysit while I nip to the shop?"