To point out you can have a diagnosis of severe depression and anxiety

[LunchpackOfNotreDame]

And still function

Because some helpful 'friends' are trying to undermine me by saying I cant possibly have that diagnosis because I'm not in hospital and I still work (albeit on reduced hours)

Hold on while I ring my cpn, Dr and crisis team then and ask them to reevaluate my diagnosis based on what some lay people think.

YANBU. You should be pretty damn proud of yourself.

My mother suffered from both those things and didn't manage quite so well.

Thanks IceBeing, you're very kind. I guess we just wait and see really. He won't talk to anyone but us and his care worker at the moment.

This thread has touched my heart x

I'm chronic. Have been hospitalised in the past and yet here I am....home owning, bill paying and SHOCK HORROR! Driving the innocent public on a bus. So either 17 years worth of doctors are wrong or it is possible to carry on in life

I agree that its perfectly possible to be diagnosed with anxiety and depression and to appear to be functioning normally. However I wouldn't like this thread to pile the guilt on for anyone who is not currently able to function.
As someone said upthread its parallel with a physical illness. You may be diagnosed with a severe long term illness such as MS and look as if you are functioning-although its a struggle-then there will be times when you just have to go to bed.

I agree with above poster

Being able to function with depression is not something that we should view as being positive or that the person who is not able to as a weakness

Agree it's not always possible. Wasn't for me. As I said , I was hospitalised. Hope o didn't come across as guilt tripping anybody.
Recovery is possible so anyone struggling please hold on to the hope that you will get there in the end. You will have better days. I like this thread.

YANBU.

Which isn't to say there are some people who's depression is too bad to function. I've had bouts where I've literally not been able to get out of bed (leaving my bedroom sent me into panic attacks). But right now I get up, take some diazepam, go into work, periodically hide in the toilets and shake, psych myself up for every meeting and work from home some days because the office is too scary.

And I manage a multi-hundred grand budget, I have a professional job, I do major presentations and talks and I hold down a life and a relationship and hobbies. It's a struggle and times, and I dread to think who I'd be without my meds, but I do it.

(I'm bipolar. Currently in a bad depressive episode. But not in hospital, still in work)

Oh God the last thing I wanted to do was make anyone feel guilty or bad about themselves. I am so so sorry if I've done that.

I liked the analogy to cancer earlier. That made a lot of sense to me

I have had both for years and carry on because i have no support network or financial means if i dont work. I know how bad they are because even one day without anti d's and i spiral down so quickly its scary. I look around at work sometimes and wonder if its only me. You never know whats really going on behind most people's public facade unless they let you in.

YY depression or anxiety are not "one" type, it's a spectrum or whatever and it goes up and down.
My referrals always stated " this well-dressed and presented lady" which I think is doctor code for "still gets dressed and brushes her hair" as actually that is useful info in case it changes. Still went on to say I had MH issues though.

It's not doctor code for still gets dressed and brushes her hair. It's Dr code for don't fuck this one about because she probably knows how to complain. It's used outside MH clinics too.

What, lazy?

I know it's rubbish if people think you must be ok becase you look ok. But that's because it's always people who don't see me during the 'bad times', of course I look ok at that moment or I wouldn't be out and about meeting them. However it's usually the same people who can't understand why I'm not employed or heavily involved in something like volunteering. Which I'm not, because my MH issues do significantly impact on my life.

I am happy to believe you when you say you have a diagnosis of severe depression and anxiety, and I'm sure it feels like hell in your head, however I find it hard to understand how that doesn't impact on your life more.

In some cases - don't know if this applies to you OP - the type of job makes all the difference. owlborn says "I... periodically hide in the toilets and shake, psych myself up for every meeting and work from home some days because the office is too scary. Clearly this is not possible in a lot of jobs. I have been fired so many times due to MH simply because I looked unhappy (tears forming in eyes whilst trying to keep fake smile plastered on), was shaking, get confused and muddled when low/overwhelmed, that sort of thing.

In another way I look ok day-to-day, eg. my flat is clean and I eat ok (when I don't feel too sick with anxiety.) However, I actually clean when stressed/anxious as a coping mechanism, and going to the shops is a half hour thing so just requires coping for a short while. So I can sort of see both sides of this!

However, I thought to diagnose depression/anxiety they had a scale rating thingummy? I can't quite understand how it would be possible to score highly enough for the 'severe' label without it impacting on yor life more, simply becaue of the type of questions asked.

surprise because some people have the ability to hide it more than others. I can "fake" being normal for a period of time. Some people cant. That doesn't mean mine isn't as serious.

surprise I'm not sure how, from my couple of posts on this thread, you determined I'm coping. I'm functioning. There is a difference.

I think it also depends on the cause of the depression. Mine is intrinsically linked to my physical health and I feel I have to show I can be wonder woman so people don't perceive me to be a shirker due to the amount I'm off sick. Just because in public, and indeed because I go to work, I appear to be able to deal with it all doesn't mean I can.

I don't have a social life. My anxiety has taken that from me.

I don't have a home life. My depression has taken that from me.

I have lost who I am as I've been swallowed up by illness upon illness and I will never. Never. Get me back. Ever. That is a horrible thing to recognise at an age where most people have only just realised who they are.

So yes I may not be in a hospital being heavily medicated and undergoing intensive daily contact with MH professionals but I am undergoing the community equivalent. It's gruelling balancing it all. Balancing not only my appointments and treatments for my physical health, but also the ones for my mental health, working, being a mum, being a wife, being me. I'm tired. So very tired.

But surely, by definition, it's more 'serious' if the person's mind is so clouded/overwrought/focussed on suicide that they can't 'pretend'/cover it up? Surely degree of disability is relevent when catergorising 'seriousness'?

Plus how do you do it? I've been wanting to know that since my first encounter with MH services a decade ago! (Have worked in that time but never for long.) I thought they'd give me some therapy working on the underlying experiences causing me to feel so awful plus very targetted techniques and things to manage in work. Sadly not :(

It just worries me because of the general "back to work" mantra for the mentally ill, to do with benefits. The idea that MH problems are likely to affect functioning may be frustrating for some, but trumpeting the idea that it doesn't need to stop you working could be deadly for others, so I'd rather err on the other side tbh.

Also amazed the OP has a CPN and the rest - not that she doesn't require it, just that round here you have to be mid-pychotic episode to get one, due to funding.

It is entirely possible to have head space for functioning and for suicidal and negative thoughts. It is also entirely possible to have a cpn and not be psychotic

I'm not jumping on any bandwagon or chanting any tory mantra about everyone needing to go back to work. For some, me included, work is one of the last bits of 'us' we have left. For me what is keeping me going, keeping me out of hospital and fundamentally keeping me alive is being able to work.

surprise not necessarily, the times I can't cover it could be worse than the whole time for someone else. It's hard to say because everyone's different and reacts differently

i don't know how I do it. I just sort of fake it. I can't keep it up for long.

I agree with that, my point is that people are affected differently so just because someone looks okay and is at work doesn't mean they don't have a mental illness.

I don't have a CPN either and get very little support - like you said you have to be in crisis to get it, even if you're diagnosed and asking for help

You can't win. Get off your arse and function and you can't possibly have depression. Suffer and stay off work and struggle to function and you need to pull yourself together/help yourself

Its shit isn't it sharon

Yep! Ignorant bastards really will use any stick to beat you with!

It is entirely possible to have head space for functioning and for suicidal and negative thoughts.

And what about the leaden weight feeling, difficulty concentrating etc. that are typical of depression?

I'm just struggling to understand this. I mean, I have times where I feel dreadful, anxious, suicidal, and hopeless but can still sort of function. But these times are better than when it's so bad I can't function. The very act of being able to ignore/put those things to one side whilst concentrating on something else means they are not as acutely painful and overwhelming as when I am unable to do that.

It is also entirely possible to have a cpn and not be psychotic.

Yeh, I didn't say it wasn't. Just that I was surprised because of the situation in this area, and the crisis in MH funding in general. I guess they have different criteria. Round here, stuff like holding down a job is seen as evidence of not needing input from secondary services. You could still see someone under the IAPT services in primary care, but wouldn't have access to a CPN or psychiatrist. If functioning varies so much the access criteria needs to be less of a blunt instrument I think!

feline the times I can't cover it could be worse than the whole time for someone else.
That makes sense. Thanks for explaining a bit :)

I have a diagnosis of BPD with bipolar traits, complex PTSD, severe anxiety and a dissociative disorder. I have a CPN, a Psychologist I see weekly, a Psychiatrist and a care plan. I am heavily medicated with mood stabilisers, anti psychotics and diazepam. I lose hours of time every day to severe trauma based dissociation (I was abused as a child/teenager) and often don't know how I got somewhere/remember things I'm supposed to have done. I receive high level disability benefits mainly for my mental health (I have a physical disability too).

You wouldn't know it to talk to me.