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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think a quick headcount on getting back into the car is not too difficult to remember?

166 replies

Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g · 10/08/2015 18:19

BBC news story here. A family left their 3yo at a motorway service station and didn't notice that she wasn't in the car for 2 hours. How? Poor little kid. Hope she's all right now. Sad

OP posts:
youarekiddingme · 10/08/2015 18:39

Although it's just dawned on me if it was an mpv maybe she sat behind the middle row? So they may have assumed she was asleep and the other had strapped her in?

Andrewofgg · 10/08/2015 18:42

My elder sister did it to me when I was a few months old. Not that I remember!

I am trying to put myself in the position of the family who found this child and who presumably had to give up part of their day waiting for the police. And of course if it had not been decent people . . .

girliefriend · 10/08/2015 18:47

I wondered if the parents were drunk or something? How could you not realise your 3yo wasn't in the car? Confused Its so weird.

Apparently the police are considering charges of neglect....

Eva50 · 10/08/2015 18:49

Perhaps a rear facing car seat in the third row of seats. Each parent may have thought the other had strapped her in. It's the only way I can think they wouldn't have noticed and that's stretching it.

NellysKnickers · 10/08/2015 18:51

The peace and quiet would have given it away for me

purplemurple1 · 10/08/2015 18:54

We went out without dc2 who was 4 months.
We had people with a baby visiting and were using two cars. So strapped in two kids jumped in cars and left. Luckily there was an adult in the back by the lo seat so quickly got asked where she was, did we have another seat in the other car.

She was in the house happily sleeping and unaware. If no adult had been in the back I can well imagine we would have taken a lot longer to notice.

Original poster
Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g · 10/08/2015 18:54

Here's the story about the baby floating out to sea in Turkey. She was fine, fortunately.

OP posts:
MadamArcatiAgain · 10/08/2015 18:57

Easily done!

ChanandlerBongsNeighbour · 10/08/2015 18:59

My other DC would certainly pipe up of we had left one behind! Strange that no one noticed at all!!

LineRunner · 10/08/2015 18:59

The Guardian story suggests there was one car and they heard it on the radio after two hours, and turned around.

MintyLizzy9 · 10/08/2015 18:59

I'm an only child and was once left to my own devices for 2 hours in a very busy town centre (M&S) age 5 as when my parents decided to divide up to save time they both went off on their merry way to different shops each assuming the other had me....to be fair I was like a pig in shit very content trying on shoes and hats and it was a good hour before I twigged I had been left then spent the next hour being bribed with sweets entertained by security until my parents met back up to "discover" I wasn't about!!

30 years on it can still cause a row between them Grin

CoperCabana · 10/08/2015 19:00

This is a really horrible story and I hope nothing more sinister, but Dita's post is v funny DD2 I am looking at you

chickenfuckingpox · 10/08/2015 19:00

ive a nearly three year old i cant imagine him being so quiet i would forget him he cant talk much but he makes himself known

2 hours is a long time

not surprised the older sibs didn't say anything at first my moms older sisters let her go in the pushchair down a steep hill they wanted to see how fast she would go!

but for two hours?

OnIlkelyMoorBahtat · 10/08/2015 19:02

Wasn't there a poster on here who said that when she was very small, her family were going on holiday; her parents got the suitcases packed, got her ready, got the baby ready, they all walked to the station and it was only when she asked "Doesn't the baby want to come on holiday?" while they were sitting on the platform waiting for the train that her parents remembered the baby was still in its carrycot in the living room?

Glad the wee lad's back with his folks, that must have been really scary and upsetting for him.

CoperCabana · 10/08/2015 19:04

There is no way DD1 would have not told me! She is very quick to point out all my errors!

RJnomore · 10/08/2015 19:05

I drove away from sainsburys without d1 last year. She was 14. She went to put the trolley back for me, I checked dd2 was belted and drove off. Never even remembered dd1 should be there.

Fortunately I went into the petrol station so she ran over. Was not amused at all.

I also once forgot to take dd2 to nursery years ago and was a good 15 minutes into my commute before I realised she was still in the back.

But 2 hours is a stretch!

AliceInUnderpants · 10/08/2015 19:10

The only way this could have possibly be an accident that I can come up with is if they were travelling in a 7 seater and 3yo was left sleeping right in the back part of the car whilst the rest of them went into the services. They came back out and got on the road, with noone checking - and the 3yo had escaped whilst they were gone.

I really can't come up with an alternative.

PerpendicularVincenzo · 10/08/2015 19:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

bloodyteenagers · 10/08/2015 19:12

So for 2 hours, neither parent talked to any of the dc's. Looked
Over their shoulder see if they were ok.
Ask them if they wanted a drink?
Nothing.

Forgetting your kid outside a shop, whatever happens. But the thing is you went back when you realized. Not when you heard it on the radio.

sliceofsoup · 10/08/2015 19:14

Reading parts of this thread out to DH and he has just confessed that when DD2 was a newborn (shes now 2.5) he went into the garage to pay for petrol and buy some milk and took her with him in the carry car seat. He left her down by the milk, forgot her, walked around the shop, paid, went out to the car, started the engine and was about to drive out of the car park when he realised.

No one had even noticed she was unattended, so it can't have been that long, but still. Shock Confused :o

BlueStarsAtNight · 10/08/2015 19:14

I can conceive that you might not notice if the other kids were asleep, and if the 3yo was in an extended rear-facing car seat with no mirror. That poor child must have been so scared.

Hygge · 10/08/2015 19:20

My brother would have let my parents drive to the other side of the world without mentioning me not being in the car if this had been us when we were little. He would have been delighted that the holiday was already going better than he could have hoped Grin

My mum did actually leave me in my pram outside a shop once when I was a baby, but we lived less than a minute away and she remembered me as soon as she got home. She ran straight back.

I imagine that both parents thought the other had strapped the child in and then perhaps thought she was asleep.

I read that they only realised she was missing when they heard on the car radio that a child had been found at the service station they had stopped at.

My heart goes out to them for the total panic they must have felt at that point.

I can't imagine being in that situation, having just DS think of, but I hope i'm never distracted enough to find out.

Tangoandcreditcards · 10/08/2015 19:22

Am I the only one who read this story and felt real empathy? It gave me a stomach-lurch thinking about the moment they realised it was them...

I only have an 18mo DS but I can see how this could happen. Maybe she slipped out of the car whilst they were stopped, maybe she'd been asleep or they thought she was, maybe the back was full of holiday gubbins and they didn't check under a blanket, maybe the other 2DCs are babies, maybe they were flustered, arguing, sleep deprived or otherwise distracted.

When I was a kid my DM once left my 5/6yo (never quiet) behind DSis at school. 3 other siblings (me and DBros) and 1 other child in the car and it took the other kid (as we dropped him off) to pipe up "is the little one out to tea?" The rest of us hadn't even noticed she wasn't there...

Orangeisthenewbanana · 10/08/2015 19:24

I was Shock at this too. How could 2 parents and 2 older children not notice they were missing someone??

MrsHathaway · 10/08/2015 19:26

Something like six children a year? week? die in the US in hot cars and a ridiculous number are rear-facing babies whose parents forgot to drop them at daycare and left them in the car park at work.

Re the two hours ... is that a total of four spent apart, or one each way driving?

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