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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

help please!

26 replies

0ldmum · 26/07/2015 14:06

Please let me know whether IABU, we have builders in and they have cut a doorway, when they had built the frame I came in and straightaway noticed it is really low, measures at lowest point of frame 196.5 cms, and the floor is a little unlevel specifically a little low underneath. I think we should make them redo husband doesn't, I am thinking of resale, and my eldest son is 6'4" and before any flooring is laid he has about 1cm clearance, with normal deck shoes on.
My husband is threatening to sell the house and divorce as I am going on about it so much, but I feel we are paying a fair rate for the job and to me now the doorway is always going to look tiny. I can't have reall wood floors because they will raise the floor too much and I am thinking it will notice.
My husband thinks I am being totally unreasonable about this, am I?

OP posts:
RedHelenB · 26/07/2015 14:25

If you're not happy tell them asap!

Smoorikins · 26/07/2015 14:29

What height is the door? Surely that dictates the height of the door frame?

soloula · 26/07/2015 14:32

My husband is 6'5 and he has a good few inches clearance through our doors. We are just in a regular new build so your door does sound small. If you're not happy you have to say something as it'll just wind you up every time you look at it if you let them carry on as is. How big are your other doors? Presumably that would be a good comparison?

millymae · 26/07/2015 14:33

No I don't think YABU - I've just done a quick google and this is what I've found:

'The height of common doors is 6 feet 8 inches. The standard height of the rough opening for a door is the door height plus 2 5/8 inches. The additional room allows for a 3/4-inch top jamb, a shim space above the door jamb and the thickness of underlayment and finish flooring. If you are using pre-hung doors the opening should be 1/2 to 3/4 inch taller than the door and its jamb plus the thickness of any underlayment and finish flooring.'

I am clueless when it comes to things like this and can't vouch for the web-site, but based on what it says I would have thought that you should at least be expressing your concerns to the builders. If your measurements are correct the height of the opening could well not be big enough.

Original poster
0ldmum · 26/07/2015 14:34

@redhelenb, I would like a shot but my husband thinks IABU! I suppose what I want to hear is that IABU and it is fine to have a doorway a good 2cms smaller than normal.
@smoorikins, they had already cut 2cms off the bottom of the door when I got in, and they aren't cheap doors, they are glass interior french doors.

OP posts:
Original poster
0ldmum · 26/07/2015 14:36

@millymae, this is what I think but to be honest my husband is being a complete git and I really do think he will piss off if I insist.

OP posts:
Original poster
0ldmum · 26/07/2015 14:37

And much as he is being a complete git in this case he isn't normally.

OP posts:
Smoorikins · 26/07/2015 14:37

WTF? They cut your doors?

YA most definitely NOT BU.

Topseyt · 26/07/2015 14:38

Ask them why they couldn't have put in a normal sized doorway. Measure what height your normal doorways are. Measure the new one and write down the difference in height. If the new one really is significantly lower ask why, and ask them to rectify it.

You are right to want the job done to the correct specifications. You don't want a doorway where at least one of your family will be continually socking their head.

MummaGiles · 26/07/2015 14:40

That's ridiculous! They cut two inches off the bottom of the internal door they were there to fit? Surely this should have flagged to them that the doorway they had cut was too small. Unless there's a reason why it couldn't go any higher, such as wiring/plumbing/something structural right above the new doorway that they otherwise would have cut through I would be asking them to make the doorway bigger and provide a replacement like for like door to fit in it out of their own pocket. They've messed up. YANBU.

LuisSuarezTeeth · 26/07/2015 14:41

Your husband will leave you over a door? Shock

He sounds charming

KittensOnAPlane · 26/07/2015 14:42

are you paying them to do a job? or are they doing you a favour??

you want them to sort it out and get your door replaced! FFS

Original poster
0ldmum · 26/07/2015 14:43

They cut the doorway and they put a beam in and they say they couldn't get any higher because of the coving being damaged, but thats bullshit as the neighbours is higher. I only noticed it was lower than normal when the wood framework for the door was being put in, otherwise I would have said something sooner. It was 2cms not 2" off the door.
Though to be honest my husband I think will end the marriage if I do say, he has seriously said I am driving him up the wall going on about it, and we will get the house done and then sell it.

OP posts:
jelliebelly · 26/07/2015 14:48

You are paying the builders to do a job - if they aren't doing it how you want then you need to tell them - in this regard YANBU.

Your dh on the other hand is threatening to leave you over a door frame - really??

MyPelvicFloorTrainsItself · 26/07/2015 14:59

If he will leave you over this then the doorway isn't your issue

Original poster
0ldmum · 26/07/2015 15:03

Yes well I am thinking this, can't stop crying.

OP posts:
Original poster
0ldmum · 26/07/2015 15:05

I have had lots of issues in my life due to a crap mum and a crap dad and stepdad and I do get into a state about things, but he is trying to make my be the unreasonable one over this.

OP posts:
Original poster
0ldmum · 26/07/2015 15:06

And actually he is actually quite a nice person normally.

OP posts:
Penfold007 · 26/07/2015 15:11

So is this thread about short doors or your issues?

The5DayChicken · 26/07/2015 15:18

Your husband is threatening divorce over a door? Fucking hell.

achieve6 · 26/07/2015 15:22

I'm guessing OP means her husband will be pissed off if she insists, not that he will actually leave...

I'd insist. if it's not standard it will be a pain. Why on earth didn't they do it standard height initially?

Original poster
0ldmum · 26/07/2015 15:24

No this is about whether IABU about wanting a doorway to be a standard size. I was hoping you would say I was but now I know I am not. I was trying to defend my husband saying he has had to put up with me when I have been in tears over various issues with my mum, I am not wanting to go into those now.

OP posts:
mrsfuzzy · 26/07/2015 15:25

there is a lot more to this post than the door isn't there ?
maybe you are 'going on' a bit about it but that would normally evoke the d. word, the door needs sorting out properly.
yanbu.

missingmumxox · 26/07/2015 15:26

I would save myself sometime by telling my dh to sing his hook first then tell the builders to sort out their mistake.

Honestly he can't be nice normally if you truly think he would leave you over this, or are you depressed, given the history you give about your mum and dad.

But whatever the reason you are nbu, if you can see the issue so will any buyer, it will only look more obvious once you get carpet/flooring in and then have to take more off the door to make it shut, they are relying on this job being done so far down the line you will have paid them then when you ask them to correct the issue they will just flick you the bird.

Sort it now it will effect the sale

mrsfuzzy · 26/07/2015 15:28

can understand you don't want to dicuss your personal stuff, but you have a lot going on in your life, and although it is probably a strain on dh with you being emotional.he really isn't helping by upsetting you further.

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