Daily posts of baby on FB

[shebird]

A family member had a baby 6 months ago. Since the day baby was born she posts at least 3 photos and sometimes videos of baby together with updates on baby's weight, sleep and how much she's has expressed I thought this might have dwindled out as baby got older but it's not looking likely.

I'm aware that I can hide her posts and I am not having a moan about how annoying I find FB. My concern is for the child's privacy. We are not talking the odd cute photo here, pretty much all of this child's life to date has been documented on FB. Do children not have a right to have everything shared online or AIBU?

It really depends what sorts of details are posted and how long it goes on for, tbh.

To post every detail of your child's life on Facebook to all and sundry for years would be foolish for anyone, particularly if you have Facebook friended an awful lot of people and are posting indiscriminately to all of them. To help deal with loneliness and depression, or just a sense of isolation, by sharing experiences with supposed friends on Facebook (because you don't get to see them in real life) might just be a lifeline for you for a short while, even if tiresome to your supposed friends. Making all your Facebook posts totally public is just a bit bizarre.

Obviously, if you ended up having ambitions to be a spy or a world leader, evidence of parental neediness and details of your nappies might well be an embarrassment to you, even if only shared with people your parents trusted at the time. Embarrassing and incriminating details have a way of finding their way out, in any event, though. If you have led any kind of life at all, and your parents have been anything other than boring drones, there will be something or someone out there waiting to embarrass you. You will look quite sinister if it appears you have gone out of your way to cover up what you have done in your life and with whom from birth to the present day. It's far more fun to get pictures of squeaky clean people doing Nazi salutes or whipping prostitutes or being friends with inappropriate blabber mouths than it is to get compromising pictures of people whose nappies have already been broadcast on the internet... So watch out anyone in public life, because you can't actually sanitise reality forever, you are just delaying the inevitable.

And as for the incontinent thoughts posted on Twitter by people in public life...

Plenty of people in positions of discreet power and influence have been blackmailed by others who have found out their little secrets.

I think it is a very hot topic where nobody is wrong or right.
Yes. Unfortunately, those who find out they were wrong, likely only find through their children, and them go on to palm them off with platitudes about, "Oh well! back in those days we were all doing it."

I have absolutely no doubt that every scrap of detail about me is garnered by a dozen or more computer systems around the world, collated, filed and stored. And those are just the big players in Information Age. We know who those ones are and we know their agendas.

I think its a bit unfair to assume that those who have been defrauded are somehow at fault.

I am still amazed at how many people won't even bother concealing their PIN numbers at a cashpoint machine. For more than a decade we have known that card readers and PIN cameras are fitted to a large number of cashpoint machines throughout Britain. Yet people do not even bother to conceal their PIN numbers when they punch it into a keypad. That is how dumb some people are. If they find out that they are buying stereo equipment because their card was cloned, yes they are at fault. They knew how to protect themselves and they couldn't give a shit until someone stole from them.

And this is basic everyday security. This is the easy stuff. Stuff we've all known about for twenty years. We're not talking about contactless payment cards and remote access to yoir electronic devices here.

Incidentally, Ashley Maddison hack, with idiots posting their personal details online. Way to go. It'll be a hoot if they publish a list of all the worlds cheaters who have been actively seeking affairs. Bet they never thought about their own privacy or security when the let their hormones run riot.

Well, you see, EllieFAntspoo, humans will be humans, and as such, only the boring and powerless ones don't have any secrets or take any silly risks. In fact, the more powerful, the more bizarre and risky their secret lives are often revealed to be (or have been, if they're lucky).

Plenty of people in positions of discreet power and influence have been blackmailed by others who have found out their little secrets. That sort of thing would be considered rude. What you are describing is more likely to be someone wishing to advance their own career and selecting the wrong step on the ladder. It tends to lead to a fall for the blackmailer, if not a little wet work.

It's more a case that those who develop careers of service to those who need them, find that a public persona of any sort closes doors. But then those with a penchant for social media tend not to even recognise the mechanics of the world around them, and buy into the world that has been socially engineered for them to live in.

Well, to be entirely honest, those people can continue living in their world of "service to those who need them," EllieFAntspoo, and the rest of the world can be happy to have that invisible and rather sycophantic sounding door closed to it. Neither side of the door is covered in honesty or integrity, nor is either side creating a meaningful and uncorrupt world, so why would you want to end up on the sly and secretive side of it, anyway?

In fact, the more powerful, the more bizarre and risky their secret lives are often revealed to be.

Indeed, (if were talking about the AshleyMaddison hack here), but unlike those who walk our hallowed halls and attend certain parties and partake in certain abuses, your average schmo cannot have a police investigation closed, cannot have documents 'disappear' and does not have friends in the Crown Prosecution Service to help decide what might not be in the public interest. And I'm sure 99% of those partaking in AshleyMaddison's introductions were merely having consensual sex with willing partners, and the only real scandal is that the spouces at home though they had a happy marriage.

I, for one, enjoy the idea of outing those dumb enough to post their personal information on a site like that. It'll teach them to protect their privacy in future, and it'll teach their spouces more about the men and women they are married to.

You have been quite judgemental in some of your posts, none of which is necessary in order to get your opinion across. I don't appreciate being called dumb just because I typed my pin number on a key pad in Tescos!!! If I remember rightly, I was in there at 10pm at night and nobody was behind me because it was late. So please tell me again how it is my fault my card was cloned???

You assume everything you say is right whilst the rest of us are wrong. It is a shame to belittle what others say and make assumptions that we are all idiots who don't have a clue what is going in the world. You can't expect to be very opinionated about a topic and not expect to get stuff back that you might not agree with. Clearly this a topic you feel strongly about and fair play to you, I get is probably frustrating that some of us may not see where you are coming from but there is no need to be patronising to people.

I was honest and said whilst I agreed with a lot of what you said, there was some things I disagreed on but that was just my opinion (which is neither right or wrong). I did not attack you or be rude (unless you class this reply as rude in which case I am sorry but I am a bit annoyed).

It is a free country and everybody is entitled to their opinions, be they right or wrong in your eyes. Nobody is ever right or wrong, there is always going to be a mixture of opinion, especially on such a topic as this.

Ah, so you like to out the average schmo but protect the corrupt and powerful?

I used to post a lot more about my kids than I do now. Various reasons why, 1. I don't want to be on Facebook all the time, I have visions of my kids remember me staring into my phone during their childhood. 2. I got concerned about the privacy even though my account is set to private and 3. my kids especially my 8 year old asks me not to now!
I am slightly worried about Instagram now because there are apps that can be used to get into private accounts.

Personally I'm not bothered by the privacy thing, I think people stress too much about it.

I post loads of pictures of my kids for family and friends to see. Even if (as privacy settings are not completely foolproof eg when you tag someone their friends can see your post) someone else can see a picture of my child and their name, how is that any different to someone in a shop hearing me talk to my child by name?

The only thing I would draw the line at is I don't post naked pictures of them as I can clearly see the possible abuse of such pictures.

I sometimes wonder if people get pissed off with me putting pics of my kids all the time, but if they do then they can stop following me. However, lots of people have, completely unprompted said to me "I love seeing all your lovely pics of the kids on Facebook"

Oh also, I think it depends who your Facebook friends are. Loads of people seem to send friends request to anybody and everybody, and have thousands of 'friends'. I don't accept requests from anyone I don't actually consider a friend in the normal sense of the word eg I know where they live/their phone number, spend time with them or used to before they moved away etc. I actually just unfriended a few people because I haven't seen them since school and am unlikely to want to contact them directly again, not because I hate them or they've done something wrong.

In this context sharing stuff with your friends is much less scary.

FB is for the middle aged now anyway. It's Instagram and twitter.

Honestly it's funny that people really think they have any real privacy settings in any areas of the internet. It really is.

Rabbit

Well, merely looking at what we can all see, the offices of state and the functionaries therein. They govern for a reason. We vote for them for a reason. They are merely puppetry, but very well paid, and their positions come with the chance to build legacy wealth. A step into civil servitude, or into the cabinet for one generation can bring with it the upward mobility of an entire family line into the lower levels of the governing classes.

I can't see that most hold no ambition or hope of ever advancing future generations of their family, and to be honest, very few outside of the aristocracy perceive lineage or their position within their family as being one of mere custodian. The traditional view is a very narrow one. They think differently, act differently, and have a different value system. However, on all measurable scales, health, education, leisure, access to resources, freedom, liberty, access to the law, immunity from the law, etc. Their way of thinking is better. It produces greater results.

Somewhere along the line, families here today are going to begin their move upwards in society. It is inevitable, but it requires foresight. In a hundred years some of them may be thought of by those around then to have always been there. To have always been influential or powerful, and to have come from a line that has always held office or formed part of the judiciary or banking industry, whatever.

But you're right. No-one really wants that for their family, least of all their children. Too much hard work, and it's never likely to happen to poeple like us, anyways. Best just enjoy life on FB. We can teach little Jimmy that kids like him can't do things like that, because if they could, we'd have done it long ago. And just to make sure, we'll plaster the internet with as much of his personal information as we can. That way everyone will see that we're just like them, we'll get lots of thumbs up, and little Jimmy won't ever be able to prove us wrong.

I have a number of friends who do a similar thing. Whilst I admit, I find it irritating, I am also concerned about the privacy aspect. For me, it's less about the data sharing/potential identity stealing/pervert side of things, and more the message this gives out to children. In my view I find the daily updating to be narcissistic, assuming that each of your 200 FB "friends" must be informed about what you/your child has done every day along with photographic evidence. As a child, if this constant public sharing and assumption that the entire world cares about what you do every second of the day, is how your entire life has been lived out, it is surely going to result in a selfish and self-aggrandising attitude growing up.
I also think it promotes over-sharing, giving every aspect of yourself over to whoever is available, which just isn't a message I would want to pass on to my DC.
Also, I know that a lot of these FB updaters spend a lot of time thinking about what they post and looking for the recognition of "likes" and "comments" and it seems that people are so preoccupied with posting random pictures/statuses to show everyone just how perfect their life is/how amazing a time they are having that they miss out on actually enjoying the time they have. I would much rather be spending time enjoying a trip out with my DD than spend my day making sure I photgraph it/tag myself/update my status/check to see who notices.

? Sorry, EllieFAntspoo, but your post makes no sense to me. Who are you talking about? Civil servants? Spies? Cabinet Ministers? The judiciary? All have been caught with their pants down...

Russian oligarchs? Bill Gates?

The aristocracy? Aliens?

I don't appreciate being called dumb just because I typed my pin number on a key pad in Tescos!!!

Sorry, I thought I was talking about the idiots who don't conceal their PIN numbers at cashpoints. I have absolutely no idea about your personal situation, although, without Tesco's staff being complicit in the crime, it could not have happened. Personally, I use cash. Always.

I am curious though to know how you know your card was cloned by a member of staff at Tesco's? Or is it just that that was the last real transaction on your account prior to a fraudulent one?

Ah, so you like to out the average schmo but protect the corrupt and powerful?

Not at all. How much fun would it be if members of parliament were amongst the patrons of AshleyMaddison? However, in the real world, even a hacker knows who he can and cannot out, no matter how incriminating and watertight the evidence. Being in possession of the wrong information and being believed to be a risk to some, tends to lead to ones 'suicide'.

Kaekae Instagram stores everything you post and so do a number of other sites. Likewise, there are online root kits you can use to brows FB accounts regardless of people's privacy settings.

Vicki The difference is, I'd have to have a superpower memory to remember you talking to your kid in a supermarket, and six months later remember that you were the same person with the same kid, if I overheard yountalking about your birthday arrangements. And I'd have no way to corroborate any of that, and I'd have to take a photo of your kid with my mobile if I wanted to pass that information to someone else.

And I'd only need to be concentrating on you in order to target you, and I'd have to do it for a long time to get enough information to make money at it (either by selling that information or committing fraud with what I did have).

But if you post the photos online and store the conversations online, I don't need to remember anything, and I can target many millions of people all at the same time. I personally don't need to ever meet you, be in the same country as you, or even be the same person from one moment to the next. Computers mop up information, store it and collate it. You have no idea what they are going to do with it, or who can see it, and you may not care. But don't make the mistake of thinking it's the same as passing someone in the street. People you pass in the street cannot sell everything you've told your friends for the past two years to your health insurer.

Agree it's bloody boring!

I wouldn't be so bold as to proclaim that only dumb people over share on FB. In fact, the person I am referring to in my OP is quite intelligent which is why it surprises me even more that she is happy to share so much.
I also agree that there is an element of looking for recognition with some people, a constant need to be validated through 'likes' and 'comments'. I don't buy that sharing in a daily basis at this level is always about keeping in touch with close friends and family there is often an element of 'look at me' in this.

MagicalMindy

It'll certainly be interesting to see how well the country functions with a whole new generation of self-obsessed narcissists coming to the realisation that actually the world doesn't revolve around them. I see much youth unemployment in Britain's future and lots of 30 year olds living with mummy and daddy.

Between over education, a lack of practical skills, a failure to teach children about money, and an obsession with social media and instant gratification, we are economically castrating our future generations, and ironically, these will be the children who will not pay taxes to keep us in our old age. There may be much pensioner poverty to come, and no-one to give a shit. Karma mayhaps.

"Where do we go from here?" Said Florence.
"Time for bed." Said Zebedee.

Some of you guys must be shitting bricks about the snoopers charter. If the govt gets it's hands on this kind of info it's likely to end up left on a train...